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"Secrets"Written By: t-shirt Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters are
copyright to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties.
I make no money with this fic. Rating: R Warnings: Fluff, light angst, sap. Post war cannon. Unbeta’ed Pairings: 1x2, mention of 3x4 Summary: Duo overhears a conversation that quickly changes his outlook on his and Hiiro’s relationship. "Secrets"
It didn’t make any sense. Two years they’d been partners, fought two wars together, faced untold danger and looked death straight in the eye countless times. Hell, they even shared a damn laundry room so why was Hiiro all of a sudden requesting someone else to back him up? He couldn’t reason it out. What had changed? Duo’s mind fought to put the pieces together as he moved from his bedroom to the laundry to change over his jeans but the fact that his partner had chosen to take Wufei on his last mission instead of Duo rankled. It just didn’t make any sense. They were getting along fine, so well in fact he’d invited Hiiro to move into his apartment. They ate together, watched the news and even fell asleep on the couch now and then but not once could he recall having given Hiiro a reason to shun him. He sighed as he moved his jeans from the washer to the dryer pausing for a moment’s reflection when he found a pair of Hiiro’s in the mix. They hadn’t even fought. The sound of the door chime brought him out of his thoughts but Hiiro’s voice called that he would get it so he continued his chore. Trowa’s strong tenor revealed the identity of their guest but Duo knew he had really come to see Hiiro which was usually the case. He didn’t mind, the two had formed some sort of bond during the war that was obviously important to his partner but at the moment hearing them banter and talk so easily was grating his nerves. Why couldn’t Hiiro talk to Duo so easily? “Hey, Trowa,” Duo said offhandedly grabbing his jacket on the way out. “We’re out of milk,” Hiiro reminded him. “I’ll grab some,” Duo replied heading down the small hallway that led past the laundry room to their front door. “See ya, Duo,” Trowa called and Duo waved back as they disappeared into the living room. He felt bad about brushing the ex-Heavyarms pilot off but after the past week he just wasn’t up to listening to the two of them bond. He’d just run out, grab a quick sandwich and some milk and… shit. He sighed heavily when he put his hand in his pocket and came up empty. He’d left his keys on the shelf above the washer when he’d put his jeans in. He really didn’t want to go back in there but the apartment was five miles from the closest store so he eased back inside hoping to avoid any further contact and grinned to himself when he retrieved his keys and no one seemed the wiser. He was just about to leave again when a certain comment from the other room caught his ear. “Is he still mad at you?” “Furious,” Hiiro’s dejected groan replied. “Well, you can’t really blame him,” Trowa went on as Duo silently eased back toward the living room to he could hear better. “You didn’t exactly give him a reason for taking Wufei on that assignment.” “You know damn well I can’t just tell him,” Hiiro snipped. Duo felt his heart beat quicken as the urge to turn and leave gripped his chest, the seed of guilt growing heavy in his gut but he needed to understand. He had to know why Hiiro suddenly seemed to have lost his faith in him. “You should tell him something,” Trowa advised sounding much to amused for such a serious conversation. “I can’t lie to him either.” “Then be honest.” “Right,” Hiiro grumbled. “Like ‘Duo, would you mind bending over so I can bang you blind?” Duo’s heart stopped. “Eloquent,” Trowa laughed but the long haired boy hardly heard it over the rushing in his ears. “You’re not helping,” Hiiro groused. “Well, you’re just confusing him with the way you’re acting,” Trowa went on. Duo clung to the wall and prayed his knees weren’t as weak as they felt. “Either tell him or deal with the problem some other way.” “Like what?” “Try one of the clubs,” Trowa advised. “Nice looking guy like you shouldn’t have any problem getting laid.” “It’s not that simple,” Hiiro sighed and Duo felt the entirety of his torso musculature system contract. “I don’t want to just do anyone,” Hiiro confessed. “I want Duo.” “So find someone with long, brown hair and…” “Why don’t you find a cute little blond and pretend he’s Quatre?” Hiiro snipped. “Because Quatre warms my sheets every night,” Trowa chuckled. “Fuck you.” “Look,” Trowa laughed softly. “You need to find a release. If it’s bothering you so much you can’t even take him on missions…” “He wears all those sinful, black clothes!” Hiiro groaned. Duo bit his lip as a flush of heat warmed his face. Was that why? Hiiro hadn’t wanted him along because he couldn’t control his libido? “Geez, have you ever seen him from behind when he wears those pants?” Trowa laughed again at the Japanese boy’s obvious distress. “Yes,” he chuckled, “It’s a very nice view.” “Nice, hell,” Hiiro retorted. “That view haunts my damn dreams. I have to sleep with my head under the pillow for fear he’ll hear me groaning or something.” “Then why’d you move in?” “Because he wanted me to,” Hiiro sighed. The silence spoke of a heavy gaze from Trowa before he amended. “And I couldn’t pass up the chance that I might get to see him coming out of the shower or something.” “You’re seriously hard up,” Trowa laughed. “I know,” Hiiro groaned. “If I could just…” he growled showing his frustration in the tightness of his tone and Duo’s ears lit on fire when he heard him say, “…nail him to a wall. Just once.” “Believe me,” Trowa advised. “Once is never enough.” “You’re right,” Hiiro agreed. “Damn, I think I could do him for a solid week without breaking a sweat.” “Only if you weren’t doing it right,” Trowa countered. “Shit,” Hiiro suddenly sighed. “I think I need a shower.” “I think you should tell him,” Trowa commented. “I cannot tell my best friend I’d like to ream his pipes.” Trowa stifled a loud laugh before regaining his voice. “I’d suggest you practice some finer points of vocal expression but I think you should talk to him.” “I’m not going to embarrass him just because I’ve got a hard on for him,” Hiiro replied. “Is that all it is?” Trowa asked and Duo’s chest tightened to the point he could barely breathe. There was a pause in which the braided boy thought he might suffocate before Hiiro finally replied. “Doesn’t matter. We were friends before my dick decided to betray me and we’ll still be friends when I get it back under control. I’m not about to let this ruin what Duo and I have. We’ve worked too hard and come too far. There’s no one in this world I respect or trust more than Duo and there’s no way I’m going to embarrass or confuse him with this idiotic bullshit.” Duo felt his knees wobble dangerously and knew it was time to make a break for it. There was no way he could stand there and listen to anymore, he had to get away, he had to think. He had to figure out what in the hell he was going to do now. Hiiro wanted to have sex with him. The thought raced around his brain as he eased outside and headed quickly toward the stairs. Hiiro, his partner and friend, the man who had saved Earth, the deliverer of mankind and the guy the Queen of the world would give her left tit for wanted to ‘ream his pipes’. He just couldn’t get a handle on it. That was why Hiiro had been drawing away? Because he had the hots for him? How the hell could he want to have sex with him?! He was a guy for Christ’s sake! His mind whirled, his heart wavering between anger and painful confusion as he made his way into town. There was no way he could eat after that but he needed to think so he ended up in a park overlooking a small lake. It was after dark so there wasn’t anyone around other than a couple of other cars parked in shadowy places but they were of no concern. All he could think about was Hiiro’s words but they still didn’t make any sense. Hiiro wanted to have sex with him. What did that mean? Was that all it was? A carnal desire to… to… oh gods he wanted to… down there… “Stop it, Maxwell,” he scolded himself wiping a hand over his face. “It’s not that bad,” he told himself. “Trowa and Quatre do it, right? How bad could it be?” He shook his head trying to clear the thousands of horrible responses his mind came up with for that one. “He’s right,” he surmised pressing hard on the firmness that had risen in his lap. “We can’t let this rip us apart.” Nodding to himself as he set his resolve he started the car and backed out, his hand once again pressing hard on the stubborn erection between his legs. “Maybe it’s contagious,” he grumbled aiming himself back home. “Hiiro?” “In here!” came the Japanese boy’s reply. Duo took a deep breath and hung his jacket before stepping into the living room where Hiiro was watching the evening news. “Hey,” he smiled watching casually as his partners eyes absently raked over his form. The wandering gaze made his skin tingle and he wondered how he could have missed it before. “Mind if I join you?” he asked coming to set on the couch with Hiiro. “Um…no,” Hiiro replied mildly shocked as Duo usually sat in the chair if he was on the couch but he made room scooting all the way down to the far end. Duo stifled a chuckle knowing that this was the only time he was going to get to play this game and sat right beside him despite the amble room. “Thanks,” he smiled relishing the nervous glint in Hiiro’s blue eyes. They watched the news for a while before a plan formed in his mind. “Hiiro?” “Hn?’ the Japanese boy replied somewhat hastily. “I have a confession to make,” Duo began turning to face him. Hiiro’s brow creased as he moved his arm from the back of the couch to his lap then back again. “What is it?” “I think I understand why you didn’t take me on that mission.” Hiiro eyes grew large and pale. “W…why do you… I mean… it was just…” “It’s because of this, isn’t it?” Duo asked leaning back a little so that Hiiro had a perfect view as he slowly pulled his shirt from the front of his jeans. He couldn’t stop the slow smile that curled his lips as the color drained from his partners face. “Duo,” Hiiro hissed unable to keep his eyes from the gradually revealed expanse of Duo’s firm stomach. “This is why,” Duo smiled softly running a fingertip over a small scar just to the left of his navel. Hiiro swallowed so hard Duo heard it hit bottom. “Wh…?” “You’re still blaming yourself aren’t you?” Duo asked reaching out to take Hiiro’s hand. “I… that was…” Hiiro stammered but the words stopped when Duo laid his hand on his stomach over the scar. “Son of a…” “What’s wrong?” Duo asked gently moving Hiiro’s hand over his lower abdomen. “Duo…” “Yes?” “That’s…not why,” Hiiro breathed looking up to catch his gaze. “Then…why?” Duo whispered inching forward. “I want…” Hiiro began having to stop to regroup. “I mean… it’s nothing you’ve done… I just…” “Just…what?” Duo breathed leaning well inside his personal space. “Are you coming on to me?” Duo heaved a huge sigh as he flopped back on the couch and lay looking up at the ceiling tiles. “Not anymore.” “You were?” Hiiro gaped. “But… why? You’ve never shown even the slightest interest in…” “Does this look like a ‘slight’ interest to you?!” Duo growled gripping the major erection between his thighs. Hiiro back peddled and tried to get a grip. “You mean you’re really attracted to me?” “Duh,” Duo rolled his eyes. “Since when?!” “Never mind,” Duo grumbled trying to roll off the couch but Hiiro leapt on him and held him fast. “Wait,” he gasped squeezing his eyes closed tightly to gather his thoughts. “I’m sorry it’s just… I don’t know what to do…” “You want me?” Duo asked. Hiiro gazed down at him for a moment before he ground out, “Hell yes but…” “But?” Duo echoed uncertainly. “I don’t know… I mean I want you, yes but… what if that’s… all there is?” Hiiro replied, his words fading as quickly as the confidence in his eyes. “There’s only one way to find out,” Duo reasoned pulling him down to kiss him. Hiiro gasped and flailed for a time before the heat began to melt his doubts and he fell head long into the sultry warmth being offered to him. The dawn had broken before either of them realized it and Duo groaned contentedly as he rolled over in Hiiro’s arms. It hadn’t been bad at all, on the contrary he’d learned very quickly that when properly performed the act of sex between men could be just as enjoyable regardless of which roll was taken. Hiiro had proven once again, however, that he was primarily a controller but Duo had been more than willing to receive the sort of pleasure the Japanese boy could give. “Duo?” Hiiro’s raspy tone cut through the morning silence. “Hm?” “What do you want?” “You’re here,” Duo smiled. “That’s enough for now.” “What if I said it isn’t?” Hiiro asked. Duo pulled back until he could see his eyes and consider him. “Something you want to say?” he asked wishing they could have just lain quietly for a little while longer. “I want a commitment,” Hiiro stated bluntly and Duo’s eyes went utterly blank. “I’m sorry,” Hiiro sighed pulling him tighter. “I shouldn’t be making demands but I can’t stand the thought of you with anyone else.” “Hiiro.” “I know I should have told you a long time ago….” “Hii…” “Maybe it’s just because I’ve been keeping it from you for so long but I don’t think I can go back to how it was. I don’t want to. I need this and I’ll do whatever is necessary to keep it. I really think I could make you happy if you’ll just give me a chance.” Hiiro’s words stalled when he got a good look at the sappy expression in Duo’s eyes. “I’m sorry,” he breathed feeling foolish. “I didn’t mean…” “I love you, too.” “W…what?” Hiiro gasped staring in wide wonder into Duo’s amused eyes. “I always have,” the braided boy smiled reaching to touch his face as his mind grasped the truth of it. He hadn’t realized it until he’d heard Hiiro speak of his desire but in his heart he’d always known. “You’re sure?” Hiiro asked letting him pull him in for a small kiss. “Mmhm,” Duo hummed nodding as he urged Hiiro on top of him. “I’ll make you happy,” Hiiro promised kissing him sweetly. “You already have,” Duo grinned then amended. “Only, no more secrets. OK?” Hiiro smiled brightly as he kissed him and sealed the vow. owari :)
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