|
"Jump"Written By: t-shirt Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters are
copyright to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties.
I make no money with this fic. Rating: NC 17 Warnings: Post War Cannon/Preventer type stuff,
Angst/Sap/Mention of lemon, Unbetaed. Pairings: 1x2 Summary: Duo’s attempt to save a jumper from a sixteen story fall reveals details about his own life that irrevocably change it forever. "Jump"
I watched Hiiro lock and load while Trowa finished threading the wire beneath my shirt. Each of them wore a receiver for the tiny transmitter hidden under my collar as did Quatre and Wufei but they were probably already in position. Quatre would be in the van we used for a mobile command post in situations like these while Wufei was no doubt hunkered down behind the shutters of some window that gave him a clear shot at the subject. I had loaned him a couple of rounds of a tranquilizer I liked to call Dozers. They were quick but left you feeling like your head had caught fire and someone tried to put it out with a baseball bat. The idea was to subdue the subject, not kill him but if we had to hit him with one of those he was gonna wish he’d hit the sidewalk after all. Hiiro slapped a clip of live rounds into his rifle and I swallowed a thick lump in my throat knowing full well that if Wufei and I failed, Hiiro would do whatever was necessary to keep him on that ledge. I really didn’t want to think about that just then so I turned my attention to the background information scrolling across the screen of Hiiro’s laptop while Trowa tested the wire. It looked like a fairly run of the mill assignment. His name was William Bardy and he worked for a stock brokerage in central downtown, a high stress position that probably left him little or no time to spend with his family. Things had gone bad recently, his wife had taken the kids and gone to her mothers, there had been a demotion due to poor judgment and evidence of drug and alcohol abuse. “Test it,” Trowa instructed curtly and I ignored Hiiro tucking a pistol into a calf holster while I did. “One, two, three.” We all new the drill but I didn’t care for wearing the wire. I suppose I was chosen to do the talking because people think I’m good at it but it’s damn hard to come up with something to say when you’re sitting on a two foot ledge sixteen stores up. It was even harder when you knew four other people were listening to you’re every word but Quatre insisted we all know exactly what was going on at all times. I guess it was a good idea but it left me feeling ill at ease, as if I were scamming the guy or something and to be honest, if he didn’t learn to trust me real quick, we’d be shuttling him off to the morgue. “He’s moving,” Quatre’s even tone sounded on the nearby com. “Shit!” I exclaimed willing my partners to finish their preparations faster before I didn’t have the option of trying to talk him down. “Wufei?” Hiiro called shouldering his weapon to peer through the sight at the subject and I tensed just knowing it was aimed at the poor guy. I had no doubt Hiiro would shoot him in the leg or something before he let him jump. “Five more seconds and he takes a long nap,” Wufei replied in a tone tight with concentration. “Damn,” Quatre sighed. “He’s retreated.” I breathed a sigh of relief while the rest of them cursed the rotten luck but I’d rather see the guy climb down on his own than be drugged or… worse. He’d just be right back up there next month if he didn’t choose to live of his own free will. “You’re set,” Trowa informed me and I caught Hiiro’s eye like I always did before stepping into the jaws of death. And like always, he was looking right back at me, his gaze so intense I could almost hear him thinking `be careful`. He never said it out loud but it did me a world of good to see it in his eyes. “Order me a calzone for lunch,” I smiled, the only reassurance I could think to give before climbing outside. He was in a little alcove sort of niche just past a junction box about thirty feet down and around the corner from me. I could have gone out the same way he did but then I’d have just popped up right beside him with no warning and the way this guy was acting I was pretty sure that would be a bad idea. This way, he could see me coming and I could get a feel for his tolerance of my intrusion before things went too far. He looked up, saw what I was about and looked as if he might try to move again so I stopped, raised both hands in a sign of surrender and squatted down to await his decision. It took almost half an hour in which I was sure Quatre was cussing me six ways to Sunday for my `irresponsible behavior` but I wasn’t going to see this guy fly just because I was in a hurry to chat. “Hey, man,” I called mostly because my legs were going numb. “I know you’ve probably got it all worked out but this is making me look bad in front of my boss.” He rolled his head to look at me but there was no expression in his eyes. “I’m gonna come a little closer,” I told him. “Just past the junction box so I can sit down, ok?” I’d still be ten feet from him, too far to do anything if he decided to take a leap but at least I could talk to him without shouting. He didn’t object so I began my slow creep along the ledge again. I made a show of slipping a couple of times hoping it might put things into perspective for him when he saw the fear on my face but he barely even acknowledged me until I’d found my aforementioned seat and then he simply said… “Stop.” “No problem,” I panted a little harder than I needed too adding offhandedly, “Damn, what a view,” as I smiled out at the city below. “Guess if you’ve gotta go this isn’t such a bad thing to be looking at.” He was despondently quite and I wondered if he was high. “You work in this building?” Had to start somewhere. “Not anymore,” he droned laying his head on the wall next to him. I watched the leg he had dangling over our two-foot edge of the world swing absently and had to swallow again. “Why’d you quit?” I asked trying to sound interested while I got a bearing on Wufei across the street. “Fired me this morning,” he sighed. “Was it that good of a job?” I snorted. “Sucked,” he chuckled darkly. “Doesn’t sound worth it,” I commented settling in once I had Wufei’s location. I knew where Hiiro would be and Trowa was probably on the roof by now. Things took a turn for the worse when he proved himself an intelligent man and turned to face me. “Let’s just cut the shit shall we?” he told me and my stomach tightened. “You know exactly who I am and why I’m up here.” I nodded understanding that bullshit and fairy dust wasn’t going to work with this one so I decided to try a more direct approach. “In that case,” I sighed moving to stand, “At least let me move out of the wind…” “Stop!” he barked and I was suddenly staring down the barrel of a pistol and sitting my cold ass back down. “All right,” I soothed gently settling back against the box. “Relax, man. It’s just cold up here, ok?” “You can leave anytime you like,” he replied but lowered the gun. “That a Luger?” I asked hoping the guys had seen that little exchange clearly but there was no way for them to fill me in. I’d put up with the transmitter but I’d be damned if I’d have a receiver spook the guy. The things I needed to get him to talk about in order to get him down were probably going to turn out to be damn private. It wouldn’t help if he knew there was a pack of guys listening in. “I don’t know,” he droned in that lifeless tone again. “I stole it out of the safe.” “Is it loaded?” I smiled and wished I hadn’t when he squeezed a shot off into the air. “Geez, man!” I gasped not having to try all that hard to look afraid. I was seriously surprised he was still alive after a stunt like that and wondered what Quatre had said to Hiiro to keep him from disabling the man. “Don’t you know not to shoot a firearm in the air?!” I groused. “That lead could come down anywhere.” He looked a tad crestfallen for a moment but it left him quickly and I was looking into lifeless eyes again. “So what do they call you?” I sighed getting as comfortable as possible. “Bill? Willie?” “… Will.” There had been a lot more than a reply to my question in his answer and I wondered who in his life had called him that. “That Casey’s nickname for you?” He snorted. Guess not. “File said she took the kids and hit the road.” “My wife was just another mask I wore,” he explained and I watched his eyes drift down to the street below. “She married me for the money and I gave her children because that’s what I was supposed to do.” “Kate’s six next month right?” I’d seen pictures of his son and daughter in his file, cute kids, they sure didn’t deserve to have road kill for a father. “And Danny’s doing football this year? You ever play with him?” He wasn’t responding but he seemed willing to listen. “I always thought that sort of shit would be fun if I’d had a Dad. We didn’t have a football at the orphanage.” Never hurt to play the sympathy string. “Or was it soccer?” I had hoped he would correct me when I got the sport wrong but he was just staring off into the distance. “I saw some soldiers play once. Weird game…” Things took a turn for the worse when he cut me off with, “How about you just shut up?” Damn, this guy was seriously on the brink. I suddenly felt as if I were walking on eggshells and decided to keep my mouth closed for once. He hadn’t asked me to leave so I just did as he bade and shut up. Four hours later my ass had gone to sleep and the tedium was starting to drive me nuts. “Mind if I at least sing or something?” I grumbled shifting my numb ass around in the hope of circulation. “You can leave anytime you want,” he replied softly. “Sorry, man,” I sighed. “Afraid you’re stuck with me.” “You can’t help me,” he sighed. “Probably not,” I nodded. “You seem an intelligent guy, I hardly think I have to tell you you’re the only one that can make it better but I’m here for the duration regardless. Whatever you do, you won’t be doing it alone.” “You talk like I have a choice.” “Everybody’s got a choice,” I grinned. “Can’t say I get why you’re thinking about making that one,” I grimaced glancing down at the earth far below. He was quite for a time and I let him work it out fearing his regression if I pushed too hard. Then my gut turned when I saw a tear fall down his cheek and he choked in a voice laced with pain and defeat, “They fired me… because… I brought a prostitute into the office.” Damn. Bad call. “Couldn’t wait till five?” All I could do was try to keep it light. He ignored the question. “He was bringing me my usual order.” I heard a bell go off in my head and suddenly felt very uncomfortable with this conversation. “Drugs?” I evaded pretending I hadn’t heard the pertinent part of this confession. “He was only seventeen,” he went on, the tears running freely over his skin. “I never could resist a beautiful boy,” he snorted chuckling darkly as his eyes rounded on …me. Shit. “I’m not as young as I look,” I chuckled hoping he didn’t ask because I only had his boyfriend by a year. I thought my chest would cave in when he broke down and began to weep heartily. “Now… they all know. Everyone knows what I am.” “Hey,” I soothed. “So what? There are lots of gay men…” “Not in my world,” he sobbed. “Casey… she left… took Kate and Danny because she found out… he and I…” “The boy?” I questioned but he shook his head and I got real nervous when his gun hand came up to scrub at his eyes. “Brian,” he choked. “I’ve had a lover for years. He was… everything to me…” “What happened?” “He left me,” he cried degenerating to a point where I tensed and prepared to spring in case he slipped. “That’s tough, man,” I soothed looking for some way to inch closer before Hiiro or Wufei took a shot. “He still around?” “No,” he sobbed. “But it’s my own fault. He was right. I should have left Casey and been true to him. I should have made him understand how I felt.” “Sometimes it’s hard to tell someone you love how you feel,” I reasoned daring to shift my foot up beneath me. “Don’t fucking talk to me like you understand!” he shouted and I was suddenly tense for a whole different reason than my concern over his falling when the gun was aimed my way. “I get it,” I told him holding my hands up to sooth him. “Just calm down. You really think you’re the only guy in the world that’s ever lost someone they love?” “What the hell would a kid like you know about it?!” “So fucking what?!” I snapped. “You think just cause I’m young I’ve never been in love?!” “Like you don’t have a dozen girlfriends,” he scoffed but he calmed and the gun retreated. “Naw, man,” I sighed trying to get my heart back under control. “I don’t dig girls either.” I hadn’t really thought about what I’d said until I suddenly remembered I was wearing a wire. Shit. Not exactly the way I’d thought of coming out but maybe the guys would think I was just humoring him and leave it go. His gaze sought me out, the curiously hopeful expression in his eyes firming my resolve to continue on that tact. “Told you, you weren’t the only one,” I smiled. He looked me up and down as if calculating his chances and I couldn’t help the sardonic laugh. “Don’t go there, man,” I chuckled. “I’m damaged goods.” It really sort of sucks being in that position, sixteen stories up with the life of a man riding on your every word because sometimes shit falls out of your mouth before you’ve really had a chance to work out the consequences. “Does he know?” Shit. This whole situation was turning into something I wasn’t anywhere near ready to deal with. “No,” I sighed truthfully. It would’ve been so much easier if he’d been an idiot. I needed to get the focus off of me. “What about your guy?” I asked. “Can’t you still talk to him?” “He’s moved on,” he sighed and again the tears began to flow. “I’ll never get him back now.” It sort of pissed me off. “Guess you don’t really love him then,” I grumbled wishing for the hundredth time concrete wasn’t so damn hard. “What the fuck do you know!?” he growled and I sighed as he sighted me again. If he kept this up he was going to be spending the next six weeks in the hospital because I was sure Hiiro was on a hair trigger because of the gun in the first place. “Chill, man,” I breathed heavily. “I just know how it is, ok? When you really love someone it’s impossible to give up, even if they’re never yours.” I don’t know if it was my words or the conviction in my tone that made him stop to consider but he put the gun down and I wondered that he was still undamaged. “You should tell him,” he sniffed and I had a moment of sheer panic as he gazed longingly down at the street. “It isn’t about me,” I told him softly. “I’m near him, that’s enough. Have you even tried to be this guy’s friend?” He looked a little guilty but I had his attention again. “It’s over for me,” he sighed. “Only if you let it be.” There was this odd little light in his eyes and I was shocked to get a lopsided grin from him. “You’re a virgin aren’t you?” he asked and the flare of crimson on my face apparently gave me away because he laughed. “You don’t get it,” he sighed degenerating into the darkness again. “I miss him… so much…” “At least you have something to miss.” Well, shit. That had come out a bitter, little pill. “I didn’t think love was contingent upon sex anyway,” I sighed trying to smooth it over. “That’s the difference between lover’s and friends,” he informed me and I’m afraid my nose twitched in irritation. I had not climbed out there looking for a lesson on life. “Don’t tell me you’ve never had wet dreams about this love of yours.” Ok, now he was just getting personal but I knew there was no use in lying to him, the brilliant color of my cheeks had already confirmed his claim. “Is he handsome?” he asked curiously and I nodded reluctantly. “Like…dark hair and hazel eyes?” “Blue,” popped out of me and I suddenly clapped a hand to my damn big mouth and hoped like hell no one out there put it together. He laughed seeing that I had confessed something close to my heart. “You really do have it bad,” he chuckled and drew his leg back up on the ledge. Bolstered now that I had his entire body on the building I pressed on. “Bad enough I intend to make sure his life is as long and happy as I can make it,” I told him. “And that has nothing to do with whether or not he sleeps in my bed or someone else’s.” Fuck it; the guys probably already thought I was just blowing smoke to talk him down. Might as well go the mile. “I don’t… think I can do that,” he said softly and though there were still tears I didn’t miss the part where he’d said `think`. “Sure you can,” I smiled. “But first we need to get you off this ledge.” “What happens then?” he asked. It was incredibly hard not to take a really deep breath of relief since his response indicated he might be willing to come down himself. “You’ll get some help,” I promised. “Whether I want it or not?” he snorted but there was a tiny smile of resignation in the corner of his mouth. “This isn’t normal,” I told him vying for the honesty route again. “You’ll be detained and evaluated but you’ll also get whatever help you need to get you back on your feet.” He was quite for so long I thought maybe he’d backslid and was thinking about that dive again but then he sighed and asked, “How do you do it?… How can you be right there beside him and not… do anything about it?” “I told you,” I smiled climbing to my feet. “It isn’t about me.” He smiled seeming to understand something of what I was saying and placed the gun in my outstretched hand. “Come on,” I said holding my hand out for him next. “Let’s get the hell out or here. I could use a cup of coffee and a hot bath.” “My ass lost feeling about ten this morning,” he chuckled wobbling so much as he stood I stepped closer in fear he might accidentally stumble off the edge. We took the short way back ducking in the window he had probably used to get out there to find Trowa and Hiiro ready and waiting. They hung back though I thought Hiiro’s head might explode with the effort until I got him safely inside then let the blue’s in to book him. Something they did with a quiet respect I appreciated very much considering the circumstances. Cuff’s where required but the gal that put them on left his arms in front and smiled gently while she read him his rights. He didn’t seem all that interested and cut her off before she was quite done. “What’s your name kid?” he asked. “Duo.” I saw something in his eyes, something that told me he doubted his decision, something that told me he was thinking himself a fool to let some kid hoodwink him out of his ultimate solution as he cocked his head and asked. “Any of that bullshit true?” I could not have lied to him for all the cocoa in Switzerland but I made sure I wasn’t looking at Hiiro when I nodded. “This guy,” he smiled sadly. “He’s a pretty lucky fellow.” I returned the expression and hoped I didn’t sound as hopelessly romantic as I felt when I replied, “So am I.” Then they were taking him away and I decided I really wanted that wire off. Trowa didn’t say anything, he’d heard it all after all, but bent to helping me with untangling myself without a word. We were almost finished when he came to stand in front of me and held out the little earpiece that allowed him to hear our teammates. “What’s up, Quat?” I asked knowing full well who wanted to talk to me. “Duo…” Gods I could hear the questions just oozing out of his ears. “Think he’ll be ok?” I asked hoping he’d understand I really didn’t want to talk about it. “Eventually,” he sighed. “Are you… ok?” “Peachy keen,” I quipped. “`Cept my ass is gonna hurt for a week. Next time we use padded jeans.” He laughed because I wanted him to then I gave him back to Trowa who, quite abruptly, bailed on my ass. Next thing I knew I was standing in a small office on the sixteenth floor with Hiiro and no explanation for all the shit I’d just said should he decide to ask, which, of course, he did. “What you said,” he began. “It was really true?” It was going to be a major pain in the ass if he had a problem with how I felt about him but I couldn’t lie. I also couldn’t force words out of my throat so I nodded instead. One thing about Hiiro, when he gets his teeth in a bone he goes right for the marrow. “I have… blue eyes.” Well, shit. Maybe if I kept it light he wouldn’t freak out too bad. “Prettiest blue eyes I’ve ever seen,” I grinned buttoning my shirt back up. He… was not amused. “Is it me?” he asked stepping forward and I think it was the sudden intensity of his tone that made me retreat. “Am I the one you were talking about?” he persisted reaching out to snag my shirtsleeve. “Yeah, so?” I grumbled wishing I could get free without seeming desperate. “It’s not exactly a news flash that I care about you.” “Duo…” “Look, Hiiro,” I sighed. “It’s no big deal, right? I’m still the same person I was six hours ago. I’m still your best friend…” Damn but I was beginning to sound almost as scared as I was. “Yes, you are,” he grinned and threw me completely off balance because I had expected an entirely different reaction than for him to pull me into his arms and quip, “But with perks.” I had absolutely no reply to that so he kissed me and the next thing I knew we were sprawled all over some poor slob’s desk. I don’t really remember how we got there but I do recall him ripping his com off and moving on to my shirt. “Hiiro?” “Hm?” “We’re…” It took him a second in which I discovered my dreams of how his lips would feel on my neck sucked rocks compared to the real thing before he came back to his senses and helped me up. “We should…” “Go home,” he finished and was kissing me again. I had never been so glad we shared an apartment. It was funny how nether of us had dared confess to the other and I thought about Will and his reluctance to talk to his lover. There was a lot of sex when we did get home but then we talked for a very long time. I suppose if things hadn’t worked out like they had it could have been rough but I couldn’t shake the sickening feeling in my stomach when I thought about never having gotten the chance. As I lay in his arms and spoke to him of our future, our past and promises of open hearts and lasing love I hoped wherever Will was he got the nerve to talk to his lover because if he ended up with even half of what we had I had know doubt he was going to live for a good, long time. owari :)
|
