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"Clutterbug"Written By: t-shirt Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters are
copyright to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties.
I make no money with this fic. Rating: NC 17 Warnings: Post War Cannon, Fluff, sap, slight
angst, eventual lemon Pairings: 1x2, Background 3x4 Summary: An unexpected love confession rocks Duo’s
world. "Clutterbug " Ch 2 Dawn smelled different somehow. I couldn’t really put my finger on it but it was a pleasant scent mingled in with the usual flavors of the morning. Hiiro was cooking breakfast like he always did since he gets up at the insane hour of five a.m. We don’t punch a time clock in our line of work however, so I say why not relax and ease out of it? Let the sun come up. Stretch out the kinks. Grin like a frigging moron at the memory of warm lips and flushed cheeks. Geez. I decided to hit the shower before I faced him and see if I could at least compose a decent state of mind. I took my time since his early start had forced my early start and I needed some time to think about what we’d said to each other. I love you. The words rang in my memory reverberating off my skull and leaving me with that stupid grin on my face so I washed my hair again and spent some time with the conditioner and a fat bristled brush. The truth was I was stalling. As clear as his words were in my mind I couldn’t help but consider the fact that he’d kept his feelings a secret for a very long time. How he was going to react the morning after his confession left me with visions of trapped wolves and gnawed legs. What if he wasn’t as ready to face all this today as he had been last night when frustration had been the root of his determination? There was always myself to consider as well. Yeah, I couldn’t wipe the slaphappy grin off my face whenever I thought about the heat in that kiss, but I’m not stupid. What Hiiro wanted was a lot more than a kiss both physically and emotionally. A lot more. I love him, don’t get me wrong. I always have, it’s just that in the past that love was allowed to flourish and grow unhindered by the awkwardness of an intimate relationship. That thought made me stop in the middle of reweaving my braid. Yep. He definitely wanted more than a kiss. The implications were mind-boggling. He had said he wanted to touch me and I understood exactly what he meant. It kind of took my breath away to think about it, but if he wanted to touch me then there was little doubt that he wanted me to touch him in return. Touch another guy. Down there. Um... shit. It was time to face the music before I totally creeped myself out. “Mor..ning?” I half smiled stepping into what used to be our kitchen. No wonder the aroma had awakened me. He must have been cooking for hours. There were pancakes and eggs, sausage and homemade biscuits. Some sort of light cream gravy in a bowl on the counter beside stacks of toast, hot buttered grits and fresh strawberries. There was enough food to feed us for a damn month and he was pulling a friggin quiche out of the oven! “What the hell’re you doing?” I deadpanned unable to generate any other suitable reaction. “I have no idea,” he sighed setting the quiche down next to what I recognized to be steak and eggs skillet style hash browns. “Well, you better quit it or we’re both gonna need a girdle,” I chuckled dipping my finger in the whipped cream on top of some of the pancakes to taste. “Are you alright?” he asked making me realize he was probably as worried about me as I was about him. “Nothing a little Eggs Benedict won’t cure,” I grinned, earning myself this really adorable little nervous smile that I had never seen before. It kind of made me wanna... well... never mind. Once the pleasant shock of the moment wore off I realized he had to be pretty damn out of synch to be acting like this. It made me wonder just how much of him he had been hiding from me in his efforts to keep his little secret. “What are we going to do with all this food?” he chuckled easing the tension a little. “Let’s take it with us,” I suggested. “We could freeze some of it,” he offered getting down some Tupperware. “Frozen eggs?” I grimaced. “No thanks. It’ll be gone in half an hour once the guys get a hold of it,” I chuckled getting the cellophane wrap from under the sink. He got quiet then while we wrapped and packaged the fruits of his frustration. At first I didn’t think much of it, but after a couple of minutes the silence started to get heavy and I found myself counting the seconds between my own breaths. It’s an old habit from a time when shallow breathing and utter silence was a survival technique. I still catch myself doing it when I’m feeling threatened or uncomfortable for some reason and Hiiro’s presence was suddenly standing my little hairs on end. It wasn’t fear I was feeing however. I could feel his eyes not watching me. The way he stayed just out of reach never brushing against me, carefully holding himself at a safe distance. It was something he had always done, but now that I knew why it was driving me fucking nuts! This was just the type of thing I’d been afraid of and it frightened me all over again. “Hiiro,” I sighed, intent on defusing the situation, but when I turned to face him, the expression in his eyes sucked all the air out of my lungs and suddenly I couldn’t recall what I had been about to say. “Duo,” he breathed in a tone I never thought I’d hear from him in a million years. It simmered with desire, a blatant need that was mirrored in his eyes and I couldn’t believe I’d never picked up on it before. “We should,” I began searching for the rest of the words in the boiling heat that was quickly frying my brain. “Go,” he supplied, but he was moving toward me not the door. “Hiiro?” I choked backing against the counter. My damn heart was thundering so hard I could feel it in my temples. “Just one,” he whispered, drowning me in a sea of impassioned blue. I was dizzy and searching for a hand hold on reality as my mind snatched frantically for something intelligent to say. “I really don’t think…,” was all I managed before he swooped in and all conscious thought went fluttering right out the window. It was so embarrassing. All I could do was stand there shivering in his arms and groan while he proceeded to do a very nice job of turning my kneecaps to jam. He paused long enough to whisper something that sounded remotely like my name then redoubled his efforts and I found myself sitting on the counter after all. Only instead of the safe haven I had thought to make it; it became the means of my imprisonment. I hissed his name arching back as his mouth demanded access to my neck. It was totally amazing how high he made me with just the touch of his hands; that burning desire in his kiss. I was lost to him long before he ever popped the button on my jeans, then suddenly I wanted him to touch me so badly it was all I could do to stop myself from ripping my own clothes off. It felt so damn good. I couldn’t stop. I wanted to feel him, taste him, know the inner secrets of his soul and it might have happened right there on the kitchen counter if his fingers hadn’t suddenly brushed across a portion of my anatomy that was never meant to be touched my another human being. The intensity of the sensation reminded me rather poignantly of what he wanted to do to me and I’m afraid I gasped and came right off the counter. “Sorry!” he panted looking for all the world like he’d just seen a ghost. “I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have... are you alright?” “Yeah,” I nodded uncomfortably righting my jeans and brushing my damp bangs back into place. “I just...” “Sorry,” he repeated. “You surprised me,” I explained. “I know,” he replied. Gods he looked like he’d kicked someone’s kitten. “I shouldn’t have rushed it.” “It’s not like I didn’t like it,” I soothed and I’ll be damned if the SOB didn’t laugh. “We need to slow this train down a little,” I told him which served to sober him up real quick. He didn’t seem to have a response to that and nodded his reply. “Come on, man,” I sighed, wondering when that kitten had wandered across my path. “I do like it,” I smiled. He returned it and I think we both felt a little better. “I just don’t wanna mess this up ya know? You’re important to me,” I confessed. It wasn’t the `I love you` he had gifted me with, but it was honestly how I felt. For what it was worth it served to satisfy and calm him. Things between us reverted back to something a little more amiable once we got into our usual morning routine. He took his shower while I loaded the food into his car. I offered to drive but he refused to get in my roadster. This time it was, “Half your damn wardrobe is in the backseat,” but the truth is I just hadn’t made it to the laundry yet that week. He had a point though; there wasn’t anywhere to put the food that didn’t involve a pair of my boxer shorts so we just took his car. The guys were more than a little happy to help us with the over abundant breakfast fare. I’ve never been comfortable with lying, but it was easy enough to let them believe we were just being spontaneous. I caught Quatre staring at me more than once however, and knew there would be no keeping this quiet for long. Wufei was giving Hiiro the eye as well. I couldn’t blame him. Even I noticed the oddities in Hiiro’s behavior and I was just about as out to lunch as he was. I thought Trowa was gonna bust a nut when my usually grumpy partner tossed a strawberry at him in retaliation of a comic defense in Quatre’s favor. I can’t help it. I love to see the boy blush so my Arabian friend is usually found on the receiving end of most of my more colorful jokes, but I had never gotten the laugh Hiiro did when he beaned Trowa in the noggin with his half eaten fruit. The inclination towards a protective tendency for me left me feeling giddy and more than a little embarrassed when Quatre grinned at me. He had me cornered by lunch. “What in the world has gotten into Hiiro?” he smiled. He looked so damned happy to see Hiiro happy it was a little disturbing. ‘What’dya mean?” I teased turning on the water in the sink to wash my hands. “You know exactly what I mean!” he grumbled, doing the same though I don’t think he had actually used the facilities. “He’s positively glowing,” he went on. “What happened?” he added watching me out of the corner of his eye like he might see something he wouldn’t hear. “Nothing,” I shrugged then laughed as I was beat with a wet paper towel. “OK, OK!” I giggled, wrestling my jubilant assailant back. “Geez! Back off! We just made up that’s all!” I told him. “How’d you make up?” he grinned, waggling his eyebrows. “You are an evil little shit,” I chuckled, reaching for a towel of my own. “He told you didn’t he?” he beamed and I stopped to wonder just how much he knew about my partner’s feelings. “Told me what?” I asked suspiciously. “You know what!” he grumbled. “It’s written all over your face and he’s thrumming like a live wire,” he laughed. I shrugged but I couldn’t help the huge grin on my face. “Oh, Duo,” he suddenly beamed. “I’m so happy for you both.” Christ, I though he just might cry. “Don’t go buying the rice just yet,” I warned. “I’m not really sure things are going to turn out the way your hoping.” “You didn’t turn him down!?” he gasped. “Well I...” I started, but his sudden grasping of my shirt startled the hell out of me and a second later I was being inspected from ear to ear. “You haven’t slept with him,” he surmised. “NO!” I barked retrieving both my shirt collar and my personal space. “Hell no! What the hell’re you talking about? He only just told me last night!” “Then he did tell you,” he repeated triumphantly. Ok, he had me there. “Crafty,” I chuckled knowing I’d been bested in the tactical arena once again. He just stood there grinning at me then all of a sudden he got this serious look in his eyes and said, “Don’t be scared.” For a very long moment I had no idea what the hell he was talking about then he raised one pale eyebrow and I felt that napalm hit my cheeks again. “Geez, Quat! We only talked!” “It doesn’t hurt if you do it right,” he smiled. “Oh, fuck no!” I grumbled, tossing my towel in the can and heading for the nearest exit. “Really, Duo!” he called chasing me. “I am not having this conversation,” I told him fleeing to the relative safety of our common workspace where he was forced to relent. He kept staring at me all afternoon though. A fact that had Trowa whispering in his ear after awhile then he was staring and smirking as well. Wufei did his usual ‘if I don’t look at it, it doesn’t exist’ routine and Hiiro just seemed completely oblivious because he was way to busy flirting with me when he thought no one was watching to notice everyone was watching. It was a pretty sure bet everyone knew where we stood by the end of the day. I was still trying to figure out just how I felt about that when we walked into our apartment and I found myself pinned up against the entryway wall. “Don’t,” erupted gently from my throat in a soft tone that put an instant stop to his advance. “Duo?” he questioned, worriedly backing away. “It’s all just moving too fast,” I told him. The conversation with Quatre had brought it home for me. What he wanted to do to me just was not a natural way for the body to behave. There was nothing about it that my mind could fathom would be pleasurable. Ok, so Quat apparently enjoyed himself but I always kind of figured he got off on pleasing Trowa. I’m afraid I just didn’t think I could be that selfless in bed without resenting it later. “Alright,” he replied regrouping. “You want anything special for dinner?” he asked turning to more familiar subject matter. “No.” I was grateful for the common ground but all this was still nagging at me. I had everything I wanted really. Hiiro was there and he loved me. I had the best partner and team on the face of the planet and a job that fed our overactive need for excitement. The thing was, I was also living with the sexiest man alive and couldn’t bring myself to accept a physical relationship with him. I sighed and made a salad while he grilled us some steaks and we went over the smugglers data we had pulled from the scavenger ship. After dinner he made us some popcorn and we settled in to watch a movie, but I couldn’t get into it. My mind just kept reverting back to that morning when he had had me caged against the counter and every cell in my body vibrated with fiery light. “Maybe,” I began as the Swamp Thing carried his lady off into the mire, “If we just... started slow?” I saw Hiiro tense, was aware of the careful control in his movements as he set the bowl of popcorn on the table and turned to face me. “How slow?” he asked evenly. I almost wanted to laugh. He was just so damn cute sitting there masking his anxiety. It was a real thrill to know that desire was aimed at me. “Can we keep our clothes on for awhile?” I asked tentatively. “Anything you want,” he breathed, moving closer and my heart rate doubled. Oh Gods, what did I do? He paused because I imagine I must’ve looked like a rabbit in a floodlight. “Duo?” “Sorry,” I kind of chuckled/breathed wiping my sweaty palms on my jeans. “We don’t have to do this,” he told me. “No,” I sighed. “I want to, its just; I need to take it slow ok?” Real slow. Like so slow my body doesn’t realize what’s happening until it’s too late slow. Butt slow. HA HA HA HA!! Ok... keep it together Maxwell. “I love you, Duo,” he smiled reaching out to touch my cheek. It was amazing how that one small gesture smoothed over the rough edges of my hesitancy. I even managed to smile for him as he moved closer and kissed me. It wasn’t anything like before though. It was warm and soft and made me feel like I’d been wrapped in a big, warm blanket. It melted me just the same but in an entirely different way and before I realized it the movie was over and it was an hour and a half later. “Hiiro,” I breathed between lazy kisses. Gods, he felt so damn good lying on top of me. He had pushed me down into the couch at some point and we had spent the evening memorizing things about each other no other activity could have shown us. “Hn?” he replied nibbling at my ear. “It’s late,” I smiled though made no attempt to move. “Hn,” he grunted and when I laughed he chuckled along with me. Then he was kissing me again and I lost track until the alarm on the watch that was lost in my room went off signaling the first hour of the new day. It was one of those times I really could have kicked myself for not having found the stupid thing sooner and shutting it off. “We should get some sleep,” I sighed. “Sleep with me,” he whispered and ‘thoom!’, I was fighting off a full blow panic attack. “Relax,” he chortled easing my anxiety with a gentle kiss. “I meant sleep, that’s all.” He is so amazing. Just looking at him gave me a sense of wonder and I realized I had never taken the opportunity to really just look at him like that before. I smiled and nodded and he took us to bed; his bed because it was a double. I usually sleep in my boxers, but that night I wore a t-shirt as well. He followed my lead and I felt pretty calm when we piled in together until he rolled over and wrapped me up in his arms. It was a very strange feeling, kind of safe and intrusive at the same time. I’ve slept alone for a very long time, but this was Hiiro. I trusted him and soon relaxed in his embrace. I suppose he must have been waiting for it because the moment I did he kissed me gently. I could feel the smile on his lips then he was snuggled up to my back and I felt warmer and more comfortable than I ever have. I drifted off to sleep that night smiling at the memory of tender kisses and gentle caresses in the arms of a man who claimed to love me with all his heart. Not something I had ever thought would happen to me but I gotta admit; it wasn’t half bad.
~ * ~ tbc... |
