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"Diary of a Protected Witness"Written By: Snowdragonct Disclaimer: Don’t own any part of Gundam
Wing or the characters, more’s the pity. This is for fun...no
profit involved. Rating: NC 17 Warnings: AU , yaoi, swearing (lots), some OOC
(probably), violence, drugs, sex, Pairings: 1X2X1, 3X4, 5XC, (past 2X3X2, 6X2) Summary: Ever wonder what was running through Duo's mind at certain points in"Witness Protection?" Here are snippets of his point of view...a companionfic, that will not rehash the entire plot, but offer a new perspective of certain events. A/N: This fits with chapter twenty-eight of Witness. " Diary of a Protected Witness"
I woke up feeling better than I had in ages, with Trowa’s warm chest acting as my pillow. I couldn’t resist sliding my hand across it, enjoying the familiar sensation. “Shini—?” he murmured drowsily. Yeah, he knew it was me even before his eyes opened. While both of us had entertained other lovers, we’d never spent the night with anyone else, until I paired up with Zechs. I kind of felt a pang of guilt, realizing how much Trowa had given up for me when he pushed me to accept Zechs’ request for exclusivity. Now that I’d had to sleep alone again, I was keenly aware of how much I’d missed the comfort of having a warm body to curl up against. I reached up to kiss him awake, realizing I’d fallen asleep in my jeans. Damn! Didn’t even get to feel his legs twined naked around mine. I felt strangely cheated. “Wakey wakey,” I crooned, nuzzling him under the chin. He groaned quietly, and then shifted underneath me. “Why’re we wearing so many clothes?” “I fell asleep,” I told him. “You must’ve decided to suffer along with me.” I got a sleepy snort for my efforts. “Dozed off,” he said, yawning widely. “Shit—where’s the bathroom around here?” “That would be the room I went catapulting out of to throw myself at you last night,” I reminded him. “Oh yeah.” He pushed himself up on his elbows, quirking a small, intimate smile at me. “Love the way you look in the morning,” he teased affectionately, reaching to ruffle my thoroughly unkempt hair. “I love the way you feel,” I responded, running a hand down to the bulge in his jeans. He squirmed under my touch. “’F I didn’t need to take a piss so bad, you wouldn’t get away with that,” he warned. “C’mon—lemme up.” “Spoilsport,” I groused as he rolled away and got up. He turned to fix me with a soft, almost sad look. “I’m not gonna spoil anything,” he assured me. “Least of all your chance with the hot cop.” “Oh, God, Tro’. There’s no chance,” I insisted. “He’ll never loosen up enough.” And suddenly he pounced, pinning me back down to the bed and straddling my legs, his face only inches from mine. “Y’want me?” he asked in a throaty voice that always brought goose bumps to my skin. “Any time.” His eyes searched mine. “But would you be thinkin’ of me while we fucked—or would your mind be—somewhere else?” I gaped up at him, wondering how he could see things I hadn’t even recognized in myself. “Face it, love,” he said with a smirk. “You’re fixated on Yuy. And this time I don’t even have to step aside, like I did for Zechs. That cop is so far under your skin, you couldn’t help yourself. You couldn’t stop wanting him if you tried.” “I don’t want to,” I whispered back, hating to admit what I’d known since the log cabin; no matter who I was with, I’d be wanting Heero. Wasn’t there some way to erase shit like that from a memory? To make me forget how good Heero had felt? God—he’d fuckin’ ruined me for anyone else, hadn’t he? “Sorry,” shrugged my ex-lover. “You can’t help what you want—or who.” I scowled, twisting out from under Trowa and stumbling out of bed. “I want coffee,” I grumbled, grabbing my discarded shirt off the floor and throwing it on without buttoning it. “See you downstairs.” I’d made coffee and was pouring my first cup before Trowa joined me in the kitchen, having apparently taken a quick shower—without inviting me. I hopped up on the counter and pouted, making him get his own coffee, just because he’d deprived me of the feel of his slick, wet skin under my hands. He took it with his usual good humor, teasing me about how we’d have ended up missing breakfast all together and arriving downstairs in time for lunch if we were lucky. And of course I forgave him as soon as he came to stand between my legs and run his soothing hands up my thighs while we talked about something other than my fucked-up feelings for Yuy. We talked about his feelings for a change; more specifically, his attraction to my pretty blue-eyed lawyer. Yeah, it was kind of fun to turn the tables on him and poke at his insecurities and reluctant attractions. Yuy came in as we were getting to the heart of the matter. As hot a guy as Trowa was, he was also painfully insecure at times. He’d had his heart broken once, by a guy he’d been really serious about. And he was reluctant to trust anyone again. I think that was part of why we kept our relationship casual and based on friendship. If we’d let it get “serious,” and one of us had a change of heart, we’d have stood to lose so much. Even when I’d taken a chance on Zechs, I’d known that Trowa would be there to catch me if it went bad. And likewise, when he found someone that made him want to risk love again, I planned to be there for him. Whether I had to prod him into taking action, or pick up the pieces if he got shot down, I’d be there. Or would I? Here I was prodding him into starting something with Quatre, when I was about to be dragged off into hiding forever. And then, if the lawyer dumped him—where would he be? It wasn’t easy to push Trowa into taking a chance I wasn’t sure I could back him up on—but I’d seen a spark in Quatre’s eyes that made me think maybe it wasn’t too big of a risk. At least, it sure looked like there was a whole lot of mutual attraction going on there. And when Yuy threw in his endorsement, I felt a surge of relief; it reassured me that the gleam in Quatre’s eyes hadn’t been placed there by my imagination. “Is that what you’re looking for? Because I don’t think Winner’s a ‘quick roll in the sack’ kind of guy.” I darted a narrow look at Yuy when he blurted that out, reflecting that he probably thought I was that kind of guy—the prick. “That’s not what I want!” Trowa asserted. “I could get that from any guy on the street, Yuy.” “You could get that from me,” I pointed out with a chuckle. And he could, too. I’d never turn him down. “I know, Shini.” He dropped a quick kiss on the corner of my mouth and went back to his discussion with Yuy. And of course, I picked just the wrong thing to say. “You could always try pointing a gun at him.” The minute the words left my mouth, and Trowa made his wisecrack about it being more up my alley, I knew I’d screwed up. “Jesus fuckin Christ. You told him? Why not just tell Chang while you’re at it?” Why not, indeed? I wasn’t the one denying my sexuality. And did Yuy not realize Trowa and I shared all our deep, dark secrets? For fuck’s sake—he was my best friend! Of course I told him. I couldn’t stand the anger and embarrassment on Heero’s face. I mean, shit. Was it that goddamned horrifying to him that Trowa knew we’d had sex? I thought he’d admitted he enjoyed it. So why was it such a big deal that one other person knew? Unless he’d decided he regretted it after all—? I got the hell out of the kitchen before my expression could reveal how much it stung that he felt like our “moment” was just a dirty little secret he had to keep. I’d been hoarding the memory like a treasure, while he’d been looking for a rug to sweep it under, damn him! Trowa joined me out on the deck a little while later, where I was leaning against the railing taking deep breaths and trying not to let on how upset I was. It felt great when he slipped an arm around me and pulled me up against him, and I made it a point to snuggle into the embrace. “Don’t give up, Shini,” he whispered gently. “I think you were right. I think he really cares. He’s just scared.” “So ‘m I,” I whispered back. “I’m scared that I’ll never feel this way about anyone else.” “I think he is, too.” Trowa’s arm tightened reassuringly. “And I think he’s never felt this way before, either. It’s all new to him. At least you had Zechs—and me. You’ve got something to compare with what you’re feeling now. He doesn’t.” “He doesn’t have feelings,” I insisted. “Aw, yes he does,” came the almost breathless answer. “God, Shini—he’s so fuckin’ confused and scared it’s kind of—sweet.” I pulled away to give Trowa a searching, skeptical look. “What did he say to you after I left?” “He said a lot, without coming right out and saying it,” came the cryptic response. “But what it boils down to is that he does feel something for you—beyond just duty. And I think he’s fighting it because he knows you’re going into relocation.” He smirked and tugged me close again. “He’s afraid of letting you get close, only to have to give you up, love.” “Yeah, but if this is all we’ve got—,” I sighed, closing my eyes and leaning into the embrace. “Fuck it, Tro’, I don’t want to waste what little time we have. An’ I’m not sayin’ I expect him to come out of the closet an’ fuck me in front of his partner. I just want a chance to know him…to let him know me.” “Don’t worry,” he soothed. “He’ll figure it out before long. He’s getting there. And maybe I gave him something to think about.” “What did you say to him?” He shook his head. “That’s between him and me—but you just keep being you—and I’ll keep trying to make him face up to his feelings, okay?” “Gonna try to fix me up with the cop, while I fix you up with my lawyer?” I joked. “This isn’t about me.” “Wanna bet?” Oh yeah. Trowa might be all focused on trying to make
Heero admit his feelings for me; but I was thinking of the warm light
in Trowa’s eyes when he mentioned Quatre. I wanted to give him
something back for all that he’d done for me. And if I could
facilitate things between him and the hot blonde lawyer, well, that’d
be a start.
tbc... |
