"Whispered Touches"
Written By: Zazu
Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing, nor do I
own the characters. I have borrowed them here for some fun and creativity,
and this is not for profit. I do, however, own the plot mentioned
here, and any instances that you may find similar to real life events
are purely a coincidence.
Rating: PG-13 (for now)
Pairings: 1+2+1, 3+4+3, 5+M (may progress to 1x2x1,
etc)
Notes: Beta-read by ShenLong Deb. Thank you!!
/blah/ denotes thoughts.
Summary: Heero moves to a new house and finds
something odd going on, something he's not quite sure about.
Started: June 5, 2006 :
"Whispered Touches "
Chapter 8
"So you guys are an item now?" Meiran asked.
"Don't be nosy," Wufei said quietly.
"I'm not. I'm pointing out a fact." Meiran ignored Wufei and turned
back to Quatre and Trowa. "It's the cute guys that are gay. Always."
"Should I be taking offense?" Wufei asked no one in particular as
Quatre flushed and Trowa looked amused.
"Who said I liked cute guys?" Meiran asked in reply.
"Should I really be taking offense now?"
Meiran only smiled in return and kissed his cheek. Wufei flushed a
little at the sudden show of affection and squeezed Meiran's hand
lightly.
"You guys...are comfortable? With us?" Quatre asked carefully.
"Love is love," Meiran said casually. "We've learned to recognize
the signs between two guys."
"Oh?" Trowa asked. "What do you mean?"
Meiran rolled her eyes. "Heero. And I'm not spilling any beans. Heero
gave me permission to say it."
"Ah." Quatre nudged Trowa. "I told you Heero was gay. Did you see
how he looks at Duo?"
"Duo is...no longer living," Wufei cut in. "And that is my concern."
"It is all of our concern," Meiran corrected. "But like I said, love
is love. What can we possibly do?"
"Nothing. Yuy has a very stubborn mind," Wufei huffed. "All we can
do is hope that Duo has a clearer mind."
"Somehow...I don't think that's the best way to describe Duo," Trowa
said. "So I think all we can hope for is that Duo does not particularly
care for love in his...ghost form."
The others nodded in agreement.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Heero tapped lightly on the attic door before he entered. Climbing
the stairs quietly, he glanced around to see Duo sitting by the window.
The ghost looked up after a moment.
"Hey," Duo murmured.
"Hey," Heero replied, sitting against the same wall as Duo just a
few paces away to indicate that he would still offer Duo the privacy
he wanted since two diaries were open on the floor. "Are you all right?
You've been up here a while."
Duo shrugged. "What time is it?" he asked.
"You've been up here a few hours. It's almost 2am."
"Wow." Duo closed the diaries. "Why aren’t you sleeping then?"
"We...all of us were a bit worried about you. Not that we expected
you to come back downstairs right away and tell us if there was any
information you’d found, but..." Heero trailed off.
"I'm not done reading. I read Mom's diary and like me, she seems to
only have written on important dates, or for special events. I read
up to Naoko's birth. Then I sidetracked and read my own diary, but
I had stopped writing at the time of Dani's kidnap. I didn't have
the inclination to write after the kidnap. I was going to read Dad's,
but then I was distracted by the family album. Mom got the diaries
for the three of us, you know? That's why they all look similar. They
were pretty much started on the same dates. At least Mom’s and mine
were. I guess Dad's should be too."
"I see." Heero exhaled slowly.
"I know you guys are curious. Can I tell you about it later?"
"Don't rush it, Duo. You should take all the time you need," Heero
said quickly.
Duo shook his head. "I...I think I want to solve things as quickly
as possible. Lay my own ghosts to rest, I guess."
"You going to be up reading all night?"
"Probably." Duo lifted his father's diary. "Dad's diary seems a bit
thick, and I only got halfway through Mom's. When I think back on
some of the events Mom and I both wrote about, I get lost in thought.
That's why it's taking a while."
Heero nodded. "I understand. Then...I'll leave you to it. I'll go
back downstairs. See you tomorrow?"
Duo nodded. "Goodnight, Heero." He watched as Heero got up and left
the attic, waiting until the door had clicked shut before he turned
back to the diaries. Picking up his mother's he decided to finish
reading the remaining entries. It took only a few minutes and it was
understandable that his mom hadn't had much time to write in her diary
since Dani's birth, other than to take down milestones.
Duo felt tears cloud his eyes as he read an entry from his mother,
recalling that he had read from his diary his own version of the event's
detail.
'I truly believe that having Danielle was not a mistake. When I
first found out, I had many fears. Fears of being pregnant at this
age, fear of the family's financial ability to bring up another child,
especially with Duo about to enter college in a few years. Fear of
how this would change the family, as a whole, or for each individual
member.
I especially feared how Duo would take the news. He had been excited
to learn that I was pregnant, but sometimes he would be moody too,
because he knew that both Alan and I know he is capable of taking
care of himself and would devote much more time to the baby. He knew
he would have to help baby-sit, help take care of the baby and he
would have to become even more independent. He'd have to share the
parents he's had for himself all of these years.
But today, I know these fears are unwarranted. Duo's got sports scholarships
waiting for him to enter university with. Our financial situation
is not a problem since Alan got a raise last year. Today, my last
fear of what sort of relationship Duo would have with baby Danielle
has been proven false.
Dani, as he likes to call her, said her first word today. Duo's first
word had been 'Ma', and his second word had been 'Pa', followed by
'okie' in reference to his favorite treat of cookies. Dani's first
word today was 'Doh'. Alan was out at work, but both Duo and I knew
that baby Dani was calling for Duo. She can't pronounce the 'u' in
his name yet, but it certainly was meant to be Duo. And my dear son's
eyes shone with pride to hear Dani call him.
He's like a little father to our baby Dani, and I know they will grow
up very close to each other. It may even be because of Dani that Duo
does so well in school; he constantly seeks to be a role model for
her. Seeing her call him, seeing his surprise, is one of the greatest
gifts I have received. Knowing my two children get along so well is
a great blessing. I pray that God will continue to watch over my two.'
Duo sighed, remembering the day. His own diary entry had been written
in an excited manner, and was short, concise, and to the point. His
mother's entry let him know that it was that day that she really believed
Duo loved Dani and had never been jealous of her presence. In Duo's
own eyes, his family had been a happy one, and Danielle had served
to tie the family even closer together.
His mother's last diary entry, oddly, was almost word for word the
same as his own last entry.
'Someone has taken Dani from our family. Dear God I pray to you
like I have never prayed before. Please, keep her safe. I will do
anything to have her back, safe and sound at home.'
Duo set the diary down on top of his own and looked at the album again,
studying the family picture that had been taken during Danielle's
second Christmas. He was suddenly curious as to what his father thought
was important enough to detail in a diary. Picking up the last diary,
Duo made himself comfortable and opened it.
'Helen. You shall be named Helen for it is only here that I will
be able to tell you the whole truth and nothing but the truth.'
Duo blinked. His father had named the diary after his mother? Truths?
Curious, Duo read on.
'My real identity is George Alton. I know one day I will be able
to tell you, but for now, the truth will lie only in this diary and
in my heart. George Alton was a man who worked hard to become a member
of the FBI. Three months before I met you Helen, I had forsaken the
identity of George Alton and assumed the name Alan Maxwell, for I
signed a contract to go undercover and try to delve into the local
gangsters in order to seek information on drug dealings as well as
the dealing of arms.'
His dad was an undercover FBI agent? Duo suddenly laughed. It was
hard to believe, but still, he read on. Alan Maxwell would have no
reason to lie in his diary, would he?
'As a day job, I became a manager of Incorporon Ltd. and that was
where we met, three months later when you became my temporary secretary
while the usual one, Sheryl, went on maternity leave. How could I
not have fallen in love with you, with your beautiful eyes, smile,
and most importantly, your beautiful heart and soul? I swear to you,
Helen, that this is the only lie I have told to you, the lie of my
real identity. After you promised me your hand in marriage I vowed
that this would be the one and only lie between us.'
Duo closed his eyes. He knew the story of how his mom and dad got
together and that must mean that his father was really, an undercover
FBI agent. He continued to read.
'The undercover job was to last until I could gather enough information
to pass on to the FBI about the gangsters. When that time came, Duo
was already five years old and I no longer knew how to tell you both
the truth. It took half a year of secretly going to court and offering
statements before the gang was thoroughly uprooted; and two weeks
after that for me to offer my resignation to the FBI and apply for
a permanent change of identity.
Helen, Duo, I couldn't tell you that I was once George Alton, an FBI
agent. And I swear to you both that the Alan Maxwell you have known
is truly who I am, and not the fabricated identity I was to begin
with. Duo once said to me that he wanted to be a cop and asked why
Daddy never wanted to be a cop. How close to the truth he had come.
I struggled for some time when I first dated you, Helen, as to whether
I had fallen too deeply into the Alan Maxwell identity. But the more
time passed, the more I knew that we were meant to be. If you or Duo,
or any of our future children were to read this, then I assure you,
Alan Maxwell is the new George Alton, and his love for you, all of
you, has never been a lie.
I swear that this is the one and only lie I will ever keep from you.'
Duo suddenly didn't want to read any more. His father had a different
identity? If he had never been this fabricated Alan Maxwell, he would
never have met Helen! Then this lie wouldn't have been there to begin
with. Dropping the diary, Duo felt himself shift easily into his immaterial
form before he floated down into the basement. Wufei and Meiran were
sleeping close to each other, as were Trowa and Quatre, who seemed
to be snuggling for warmth. Heero slept on his own futon and that
was where Duo sat close to.
Heero blinked his eyes open at the now familiar tingling feeling that
was at the back of his neck. He rubbed at his eyes before he focused
on Duo.
"Duo?" he whispered.
"I don't want to be alone right now," Duo murmured.
"Okay..." Heero sat up. "Let's go to my room. We won't wake the others
there."
Once they reached Heero's room, Duo sat down on the window seat.
"Did...you read about something?" Heero asked hesitantly, sitting
on his bed. On second thought, he stretched out and lay on his side,
hugging his pillow.
"Yea," Duo answered shortly.
"You...want to talk about it?" Heero sat up again.
"Sit still, will you?" Duo said softly.
"Sorry," Heero muttered. "I don't really know what to do."
"Why?" Duo asked suspiciously. "Are you really curious?"
"It's not only that, Duo." Heero drew a hand through his hair. "Somehow...I've
learned to tell when you're upset or not. And you are upset right
now. And somehow I realized that...I feel upset that something has
upset you."
Duo was quiet before he padded silently over to Heero and sat on the
bed. "The first entry my father had in his diary...detailed a lie."
"A...lie?"
Duo nodded, hugging one knee. "Dad swore in that entry that it was
the only lie he ever told to us. He...was an undercover FBI agent.
He wrote that he quit when I was five after he'd solved the case he'd
set out to complete. In that time though, when he was undercover I
mean, he met my mother, married her, and they had me." Duo glanced
at Heero. "Alan Maxwell was a fabricated identity that George Alton
took on."
Heero swallowed before he spoke. "I'm sorry to hear that, Duo,"
"Why?"
Heero blinked. "Well, that's obviously what upsets you. I mean, I
guess...you must be thinking that this fabricated Alan Maxwell identity
was the person your mother married, was the person who you called
father. You must be thinking that he was a fake and wondering if anything
and everything of your life and your mother's life involving this
Alan Maxwell was nothing but a lie."
The next moment, Heero's collar was clutched tightly in Duo's fists,
blazing amethyst eyes burning into his own cobalt eyes. "My father
swore that it was the only lie! He swore that Alan Maxwell was a real
person, the new George Alton, and that he loved us! His love for us
had never been a lie!"
Heero rested his own hands upon Duo's cold ones. "Then why are you
so angry, Duo?" he asked quietly.
Duo's fists relaxed. "I don't know," he whispered.
Heero wrapped his arms around the cold body and Duo stiffened under
the unexpected gesture. "You're angry because you love your father
and mother, Duo," Heero said softly. "This was a surprise to you,
no doubt about it. But you know your father better than anyone else,
definitely better than me. Think about what kind of person he really
was. Even if he did lie about his initial identity, you said that
he quit when you were five. I bet you that he had always been Alan
Maxwell when he met your mother, when they married, when they had
you. I certainly don't doubt that Alan Maxwell was a false person."
"But the initial Alan Maxwell was a fabricated identity," Duo said
stubbornly.
Heero pulled back to look Duo in the eyes. "Look at it this way, Duo,"
he said. "If a person has a past and changes over time, is he a different
person from the past?"
"Yes," Duo answered after a moment.
"But does that make them a fabricated identity? A lie?"
Duo shook his head. "No. No, it doesn't, Heero."
"Initially, your father assumed the identity of Alan Maxwell for a
case. But I truly believe that he really became this Alan Maxwell
and deep inside he is no different. Sure, he assumed a different job,
and did different things, things he probably wouldn't have done as
an FBI agent. But deep inside, he must have been the same person."
"How can you be so sure, Heero? You never met him."
"In the very least I know that his love for you and your family was
never false. Because...you would not have grown to be the Duo you
are now if it had been a lie."
Duo smiled a little. "Thanks, Heero," he murmured. "You know, it's
kind of funny how you just voluntarily touched me. When did that start?
I think you and I used to be afraid of each other."
"I don't know. Maybe...it's because Naoko trusts you."
"Naoko is a baby."
"You had a baby sister too. They may be little, but there's that pure
thought in them, that pure instinct. I trust Naoko's instinct. Plus,
knowing how close you and Dani were, I don't think you ever could
be a bad person."
"Technically, I'm not a person."
"A bad being." Heero cast a glance at Duo. "Just because you're a
ghost, you don't have to flaunt it."
Duo chuckled. "Thanks. I kind of needed to hear something like that.
It's...not too bad, being a ghost, I guess."
Heero nodded, then yawned, flushing a little at the sudden action.
"Sorry," he muttered.
"No, I am. You must be tired."
Heero nodded again, sheepishly. "I am a bit tired, but I can still
stay up."
"I could use a doze too," Duo said. "Would you mind if I stayed here
though?"
Heero shook his head. "Of course not." Heero shifted and lay down,
tucking his arm under his head. He was surprised when Duo lay down
though on top of the covers.
"Goodnight, Heero," Duo said quietly. "Thanks."
"Oyasumi nasai. Goodnight, Duo."
A few minutes later Duo's quiet voice pulled Heero briefly from Morpheus'
world, though he was too far gone to do more than listen.
"You know, Heero? Somehow, you make me feel warm. I didn't think I
could be warm, but deep inside, that's what you make me feel."
It was almost sunrise when Duo found that he was unable to sleep and
made his way to Naoko's room. The toddler was sleeping soundly and
Duo knelt beside the crib, reaching in to brush gently at Naoko's
hair before taking her small hand into his own.
"You're lucky to have your brother, Naoko," he said softly. "So lucky."
As if she heard him, Naoko awoke. After a few minutes she was smiling
and holding Duo's hand in return. Duo played with her, distracting
the baby with her favorite stuffed bear before he realized that right
by Naoko's head was Paw, Danielle's favorite stuffed toy.
"You like Paw, Naoko?" Duo asked softly, touching the familiar toy.
Naoko grinned at him and pulled at his hand. "You should go back to
sleep."
Naoko pulled at his hand again, and Duo gave in, letting his own body
melt through the bars of the crib so that he was lying beside Naoko.
She snuggled close and he tucked the blankets around her, knowing
that his own body was cold.
"You make me warm too, baby Naoko," Duo whispered. "You know, you
and Dani, if you were both the same age, would probably have been
great friends."
Naoko began to baby talk and Duo smiled at the nonsensical sounds.
"That's right, baby," he cooed. "Come on, go back to sleep." He brushed
her cheek lightly, and she mimicked him, patting his cheek. Duo smiled
again, and she smiled in return. Quietly, Duo began to hum, brushing
the back of Naoko's small hand as she grabbed his braid.
"Your brother was right. Dad loved us, no matter if he was George,
or Alan. I should know that better than anyone. He loved Mom, loved
me, and loved Dani. The lie he told was a part of his job and I'm
old enough to understand that. I think...I was upset because I wish
he had found the courage in him to tell us that instead of just writing
it in his diary. Heero is right. Dad was truly Alan Maxwell, and if
it weren't for the lie, he'd never have met mom and I wouldn't have
been born. Dani wouldn't have been born."
Naoko snuggled close again. "Doh," she murmured.
Duo pulled back a bit. "What did you say?"
"Doh," she repeated. "Doh, smile." Naoko smiled sleepily at him.
Duo leaned forward to kiss her forehead. "Okay Naoko. I'll smile."
"Doh," she said again.
"Naoko," he smiled and brushed her cheek again. Then, he realized
his hand wasn't touching the toddler anymore. He glanced up and noticed
the sunlight streaming through.
"Doh," Naoko tried to touch him, but her own hand passed through his
body. After a couple more tries, Duo felt his heart squeeze painfully
to see Naoko's eyes fill with tears. "Doh?" Naoko kept trying to touch
him.
"I'm sorry, baby. Tonight I'll be back. Doh will be back tonight,
I promise,"
But Naoko's tears were already streaming down her cheeks as she began
to cry louder. "Doh!" she sobbed.
Duo stood quickly when he heard footsteps, turning in time to see
Heero rush into the room. He backed away as Heero spared him a quick
glance and lifted Naoko from the crib.
"What's wrong, Naoko?" Heero cooed, rubbing her back and trying to
sooth her before he reached for her teddy bear in attempt to distract
her. "Shh, don't cry."
"Doh!" Heero blinked, recognizing the single syllable. To both his
and Duo's surprise, Naoko tried to reach for Duo and only continued
to cry.
~*~*~*~*~*~
To Be Continued...
Chapter 9
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