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"Alternative Directions: Options "Written By: Karina Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or the lovely
boys and their girls in the series. Wish I did. Please don't sue me.
I haven't even got a brass razoo to give you. Rating: Deffinately PG in Australia, at the moment,
but probably safer to say R for later chapters. Not sure about international
ratings Warnings: It will be 6x2, even though it does
not start out that way. After all, Zechs and Duo never met in Gundam
Wing and only spoke briefly over a com line in Endless Waltz. I've
tried to keep them in character as I saw them in the series. A bit
of language creeping in under stressful conditions. Pairings: eventual 6x2, past 2xH, 2+H,6x9, 1+R
Summary: Directions is set post Endless Waltz
and roughly 2 years have passed. Zechs and Noin are on Mars and Duo,
after spending some time with Hilde in a relationship leaves L2 to
join Preventers. Hilde was not happy about his decision. I guess enough
said. Here t'is, and I hope you like it. This is also AU for the standard
setting, as well as the series and Endless Waltz. Spoilers: Gundam Wing Series and Endless Waltz Many thanks to Dulin for volunteering to beta this. //... // thoughts
"Alternative Directions: Options"
Chapter 98 Mars Colony Base Dome 1st March AC 198 Time: : 23: 15 [ 21:05 Approx Sanc time] Zechs “Are you sure that you don't want me to take her for a while? You can't honestly deny that you need a rest, Zechs.” “It's fine. We need to get out of these vents as quickly as possible and your ribs would need to be strapped before I would even consider allowing you to carry her weight for an extended period of time. Get on, Giles. The oxygen supply is running low and we have to move.” Giles glared at where the beam of the flashlight reflected off of the fumes clogging the air vent and sighed. Visibility was poor in this polluted vent but it was not the cause for his temper fraying as it was. He hurt, yes, in all honesty he hurt like hell, but he was also in far better condition that the stubborn blonde who crawled behind him, Noin strapped securely to his back and pushing two bulky oxygen cylinders through the vents before him. They had decided not to strap Noin's cylinder to Zechs despite the additional room offered by the larger vent system as by not strapping them to his back it lighten the load on him as much as possible, a mercy considering the condition the man had to be in, but it meant he had to control two unwieldy tanks. “I know I hurt, but you do too. Don't deny it.” “I hurt. I admit it. I hurt more now than I did before we left the shuttle control tower, but pain can be ignored and I am capable of ignoring it.” //Nothing for it. I have to chance alienating him just to make him understand that it is not only the visions that make me different. God, if you exist, don't have him look at me like a freak now. I don't know if I could bear that from him after the acceptance he has shown for the visions. // “Look, Giles, there are some things about me that you don't know. It's not just the visions that make me wary and keep my distance from people. I have a certain … resilience … that allows me to take a fair bit of punishment and still function.” //Please don't ask for more of an explanation. Just accept it and go on.// “Resilience?” Zechs suppressed the groan. He was tired and he ached in every extremity of his body and he so desperately wanted a shower. A steaming hot shower would be heaven about now, soothing the bruises and cuts and taking the ache out of his abused body and he could have that luxury after a fashion in the shuttle bay. The emergency shuttle came fully equipped with a shower unit and decontamination solution, which would do absolutely nothing for his hair but it would do wonders for the multitude of pains that marked raw bleeding patches where skin used to exist. It was not going to be a luxury that he could not afford the time to take, but rather a necessity he would have to take if he was to finish this business satisfactorily. He needed to get himself treated and Giles scrubbed down and his ribs strapped if they were to have a hope of taking out the remaining two members of Blue Squad. If he had his figures right then there were only two more of that elite unit of the ESUN Security Agency to take out, but those two men would be the hardest to take down. It would be doubly difficult to take them down purely because he wanted to extract certain information out of them. “Think about it, Giles. You don't think it odd that I survived an explosion of the magnitude of the one that took place on the Libra? I learned quite a bit about myself that I did not suspect prior to that explosion. The truth is that I should not have survived the destruction of the Libra, but I did. It would appear that it takes a great deal of damage to incapacitate me and a great deal more to kill me. They tell me that within two days of my being picked up by Raydon's ship they were certain that I would survive the injuries I had sustained. They explained to me later that mine would be a slow recovery, but that it was going to be a full recovery and as it turned out, it was a faster recovery than they had expected. Physically I was fully healed within seven months of the explosion, though I lacked stamina and had weight to recover.” Giles considered that, crawling now on hands and knees, careful not to get too far ahead of the man trailing him. “You sound … upset, I suppose is the best word. You were not pleased that you would recover completely or so quickly?” A snort echoed in the vent as Zechs felt a stir of anger rise once again, at the information the doctors of Raydon's ship had given him. Raydon knew more that they had told him and if he ever saw the man again he would have to demand that he be given answers to his questions. It was his right to know after all and Raydon had not told him a great deal of what went on while he was critical. Those dark eyes with their golden points had not met his gaze when he had asked certain questions, and the man's voice had been soothing as it had told him to rest and concentrate on recovering his strength. There would be time enough later. Always he had said that there would be time enough later. “Why should I have been pleased about my survival? I went into that fight and I fully intended to die, Giles. I intended to die to avoid just this type of situation from developing. I intended to end everything, my past was no reason to live, believe me. Epyon showed me alternatives again and again and demanded that I choose from them, all of the options giving me a life after the Libra. A life that ranged from living in the gutter, on the run from every law enforcement agency in existence and people dying around me … helping me or hindering me it made no difference, because they always died … to living in a single room cell for the rest of my days, seeing no one, food passed in to me by automatic dispensers. Why would I want to live with that the high point of my existence? I refused the options Epyon drew from my visions choosing instead an alternative more to my liking. Oblivion. There was one vision that offered me a darkness in the future. I thought that it was the darkness of death and that seemed such a blessed relief. The darkness in my vision was not death though, or else Epyon cheated me by shielding the vision with that darkness simply because I would choose it over everything else that I had seen. I chose what I thought was death, because if my survival was known there would be disruption to the vision of Peace that I had seen and decided must become reality. I made a mistake. I grew to trust that Epyon wanted the same thing that I wanted, but I was deceived. It seemed that Epyon had its own agenda where it came to its operator and it lied to me.” // Shit. Just how long has he lived with suicidal tendencies? I know from what Raydon told me that he did not have what you could loosely call a normal childhood, but shit. I wonder if Raydon knows this? // Giles considered the flat, almost toneless delivery, crawling slowly forward. At least he did not notice his body's pain as much when he had something else to concentrate on, but the topic was definitely not to his liking. The man who followed him through the vents needed long sessions with psychologists who would not be fooled. The Training Masters and their medical teams were going to be horrified when they got their hands on one Zechs Merquise. He was a massive contradiction and an incredibly messed up man. He blinked, noting the oddity in the movement of the fumes that surrounded him, slowing slightly not only to allow Zechs to catch up with him but also to check more carefully for the next junction in the vents. Zechs bumped the oxygen cylinders into his feet, mumbled what could have been an apology and Giles winced, resisting the urge to swear. It seemed that talking about the Libra and the Epyon was a mistake as it seemed to cause the blonde to withdraw into a bitterness and depression that he knew they could not afford now. “Junction. Left, right and straight ahead.” at the silence that responded he sighed and raised his voice. “Zechs! Junction. Left, right and straight ahead. Which way?” A ragged breath echoed in the vent, slightly louder that the hissing of the oxygen tanks and Zechs forced himself out of his almost hypnotic trance to rub a hand over his forehead, reaching for the mental map of the vents he had been relying on. They had come a considerable distance from where they had entered the more modern vents and he knew that they had descended to approximately the correct depth they needed to link to the ducts that opened out into the shuttle bay. If he had not made mistakes in navigating the duct system then they were almost out. “Left. Take the left turn and go straight. No more turns. At the third junction on the right after that there will be an inspection hatch. We use that to enter the vents that link to the shuttle bay.” “Let's hope it is wider than the last one then.” Giles muttered and worked his frame into the required vent, blissfully unaware of the look directed at him by the blonde for his comment. Zechs forced back the snarl and the urge to snap at the man. He was tired and he was on edge and he really wanted out of this dark claustrophobic world he found himself confined to. He forced himself to move, to carry the weight of Lucrezia in silence and to take sufficient care to keep her as steady as possible. He tried his utmost to keep her from touching the sides or the roof of the vent, well aware that in the vision she had been shot by a stun gun and that her recovery from that would not be easy. While he did not know for certain that she had be hit by the devilish weapons he suspected that his vision had been true and she was now in recovery from its effects. He knew the side effects of the weapons and that few ever survived a direct hit from one set on a high setting and she had come so far and he did not want to think of her failing now. She was such a bright and strong woman and he did love her. She could have been anything her heart desired. She could have had a bright and sparkling career and he had never understood why she had chosen to place herself in second position. Second to him. Why? Why had she felt it necessary to come in second to him? He had never understood why she would cheat herself of her achievements. Was it a female thing? He had so little experience with matters of the heart and with women in general, but he had to deal with the matter of Lucrezia at some time. From his first days at Lake Victoria Academy she had followed him, dogging his heels when she could have gone her own way and given herself such a bright future. What had become of the dreams she had told him about when they had sat on the roof of the dormitories and she had told him her dream of exploring the stars? She was a smart woman, intelligent, forceful and ultimately capable of achieving her dream, so why had she saddled herself with a boy who had been lost in a nightmare since he was six years old and who had no future beyond revenge? Or was that justice? Had he not acted as he had, who would have returned Sanc to the people who had lived there for generations? //But Relena gave it away again. Everything that I had worked for, bled for, planned so painstakingly for so long, gone again. In seconds it had been wiped out again. People I knew, they were the only family that I knew, died to free Sanc from the Alliance, to bring back the people to a free country. Why? I never did understand why she did it. Oh, I know that she thought she was saving lives but she was more concerned with her Principles of Peace than the lives of the people. Did she not see or did she simply not care that they continued to kill after she was taken from Sanc? It did not end when she surrendered herself and the country to Romefeller. It did not end, it merely began again. The cycle that Epyon showed to me later that very day began again with the second fall of Sanc. I learned that I could not only look forward amid the options yet to be presented, but that I could look back as well, and trace the cycles that led to each war and to each shift in the cycles that make up what we call history. Treize was an avid student of history. Yuy said that he had used the Epyon, so what did Treize actually see? What did Epyon show him and what did it show Yuy? This is not the time for this.// He heard Giles swear ahead, somewhere in the darkness and he paused but the sounds of movement did not stop so he continued, careful with his precious burden. His children needed their mother and she was now in his care. He had not been able to find her before she had been wounded, but that was past now. Despite all of the options that had shown him repeatedly that she would die she had come from the chaos thus far alive. Hurt, yes, there was no doubt about that, she was hurt and perhaps more than just hurt. Giles suggested that she had Gifts, as he had gifts, though please God not gifts so shocking as that which he must deal with on a daily basis. He had said that she might have overextended her Gifts and that it was dangerous to herself and to anyone near her and that she needed specialist care. Care they most certainly did not have available to them on Mars. If she had gifts then surely she would do better on Station One than on Mars or back on Earth when this was all ended? //When it ends, however it ends. If it ends with us alive and free to choose our own futures then I have to wonder if she would choose to go to Station One? At this point in time she knows nothing of them, not even that they exist. She did not deal so well with learning of my Gifts, so how might she deal with her own abilities? There would be so much explaining needing to be done and I suppose that I would have to do much of that explaining. God. I do not look forward to that. He said that she needs training and I know for certain that I need help. I wonder if they could take this terrible thing away from me? Is there some way that they can free me from it so that I can live a normal life again? Huh. Normal? Has my life ever been normal? Raydon never suggested that, though. He never once suggested they could block or remove the ability. He only ever said to me in that quiet voice of his that they could help me to deal with it. They could help me to understand it a little better and to have it become useful. Less of a burden, I suppose. At this point I think anything would be an improvement, but what would I do if both Lucrezia and Raydon were on the station? God. It does not bare thinking about.// He gasped as he felt the surge behind the barriers that he had so painstakingly erected and hastily turned his thoughts away from the possibility of Raydon and Noin meeting. That instant surge in response to the thought was frightening in its implications. He really did not want to know and just now he could not afford to have visions disrupt him. Noin had to survive her wounds first and recover from the after effects of the shock gun and whatever else it was that had happened in that room. Just what had it done to her? Giles surmised that to effect so much damage on the room and the tower in general suggested that she had caused considerable damage to herself. Damage that would likely only be healed with the help of people who knew about these cursed gifts that so disrupted lives. For Noin to receive that help, that training that was demanded to manage a Gift and still lead a relatively normal existence could mean only one thing. //Noin is going to have to go to Station One. Shit. Noin and Raydon on Station One. I wonder if I could live on Station Two? Anywhere would be preferable to where those two will be. I could not cope. I could not hope to function with both of them crowding me.// Again the surge pushed against his barriers and he shied from that contact. Not now. Not here in the dark with his oxygen running low and time marching on toward disaster. It was definitely time to think of something else and he had learned that to begin forcing the visions to recede simply counting was best. He had learned that doing simple equations after a period of counting allowed him to stabilize his thoughts and turn his attention away from unwanted visions. Sometimes. Always there was the horrible word 'sometimes' lurking in his head. There were occasions when no matter what he tried he would go down into the well of vision and he had to accept that when it happened, but not on this occasion. He could not afford for this to be such an occasion as there was too much to do to allow himself to falter. “Zechs. I have found the access cover.” the voice floated back to him from the darkness and he breathed a sigh of relief at the distraction. “You will be thrilled to know that it is larger than the last one.” He paused, shaking his head and a smile twitched his lips in the darkness. That was hopeful. //Blessings on you Giles, for being the distraction that I need. // “If you are trying to be funny, I am not amused. How much bigger?” The man's voice held a hint of amusement and there was some shuffling from ahead and the sound of tapping on metal. “Considerably. You are of course, going to have to get Noin through separately. It will need me to go through first and you can pass Noin's cylinder through to me like last time and we can work her through. I don't think there is much danger of you getting stuck again. This one looks considerably larger and it's set lower in the side of the vent too.” //There is a God.// He sighed in relief and with a low groan he settled his weight down on the floor of the vent, resting while he waited for Giles to work loose the cover dividing the two vent systems. It would be a blessed relief to take the time to rest his aching body and he only wished he could roll to his side to give his body some relief from the position he had held so long. The ropes binding Noin to him had rubbed him raw around the chest and upper thighs where they had secured her to him and it would not now be too much longer before he could be free of the restraints. From up ahead he heard the first of the screws squeal as the magnetic screw driver turned. He knew that the screws securing the cover would be on the far side of the vent and because of that it was going to take a little longer to work them loose. Magnetic screw drivers were all well and good but sometimes they simply did not allow for a decent seal onto the screw if the screw had not been used for a lengthy period of time. These vents had not been accessed in this manner since the sub base vent systems were initially completed. He needed the rest and the only thing that worried him was that the rest might make him lethargic. He could not afford to sleep. // I think I hurt too much to go to sleep. What has been going on beyond the vents? I have to make some plans to deal with Simpson. I need answers and I need them on tape. Not easy, but not impossible either. There was an option or two that covered me questioning the Commander and I fully intend to make as much as I can of any opportunity I am presented with to gain information and evidence. Whether it will ever see the light of day is another matter. Did you just move, Lu? Ah, God woman, just stay still.// He tensed, but the twitch that had alerted him to a change in her condition had not been repeated and for anxious minutes he lay there, staring into the darkness, willing her to be still. If she had been hit by the shock gun the less she moved the better. Just how high a setting could a person hope to survive? They would not have wanted to kill her outright, but they might not have cared too much about keeping her alive indefinitely either. They had intended to use her as bait to capture him taking her as his weakness, and they were right. She was the only person who had loved him since the massacre of Sanc. His loyalty went to her for her acceptance of him in this future he had not asked for. //Damn Epyon for forcing this on me.// *Thank … Epyon … survived … * He frowned into the darkness, body and thought processes freezing. Had he …? Did he hear her? The body strapped to his back remained still and if he had heard her, whether she had spoken vocally or perhaps her thoughts, he did not hear her again. He rubbed his cheek against his upper arm, shaking his head in denial. He was going insane in this damnable darkness. “Got the cover off. Won't be long now.” //Not long, but still too long for my peace of mind. // Ahead Giles grunted as he angled himself to crawl through the access vent and the 'all clear' that rang out in the darkness was perhaps the most welcoming sound he had heard. Suppressing the groan he forced himself off the vent floor, arms reaching forward again to make the reach and pull motions that he was sure he would be dreaming about for the rest of his life. He worked his way up until he was beside the cover and paused for Giles to undo the ropes at his thighs, inched carefully backwards until the man could reach the ties at his chest. //Should I mention that I thought I heard Noin? That I think I felt her move? Ah, I don't know what is real and what is not. In this infernal darkness I would not be surprised to see a goblin walking down the vent. It's just as feasible as hearing Noin's thoughts. No, it was wish thinking. Just the darkness. He has her in the other vent now and he will check her over before he gives the all clear to me to come through. At least this time I am not going to get so thoroughly stuck. // On this occasion he was not going to make so undignified an entrance to the new duct system and to make certain of that he was careful to remove both the tool belt and the whip before Giles even returned to the vent from settling Noin. With the light returned and the man's face peering at him through the hole he arched an eyebrow, daring Giles to make a comment as he passed belt and whip through to him. “Ah, Noin's okay. Her pulse and respiration seem okay, not as good as I had hoped, but no worse that it was before.” “I thought she moved.” //Damn. Why did I say that? It was imagination, I'm sure. // “I hope not.” Giles sighed, meeting the ice blue eyes with what he hoped was compassion and not fear. He did not need to panic the man. “Don't take this wrong, Zechs, but we cannot afford for her to wake up just now. The longer she stays out to it the better off we are.” “If you say so.” a sigh. “I know you're worried about her, I am too, but for us to deal with her we need to be out of here and have medical facilities close to hand. I don't just mean the emergency medical shuttle either, but the hospital unit and trained doctors. She needs to be kept sedated until her mind can rest and begin to heal from the damage done by what I am certain was a psychokinetic blast. It can cause real physical brain damage, Zechs. She needs a scan to determine if there is physical damage to the brain and if so, just how extensive it is. She may have burned herself out, perhaps permanently and if she is a telepath she needs to be kept isolated until she can deal with hearing other people's thoughts.” “Deal with people's thoughts?” “If she is an emergent telepath she will receive plenty of white noise, that is what we call the subconscious workings of other people's minds. We think on multiple layers, Zechs, especially women. I've heard male telepaths complain before that while they were making love to a woman she was thinking about how much she was enjoying what he was doing to her, tonight's dinner, whether she had put enough fabric softener in the washing and that she would have to clean out the fridge the next day. It's very off putting for a man totally absorbed in the experience of sex to discover that the female mind does not work in quite the same manner.” “I can imagine.” Giles grinned. “Come on. Let's get you through this hole. The vent will clear of this toxic shit as soon as I can get the cover back over the hole.” He moved carefully trying to ignore the multitude of aches and pains, passing the oxygen cylinder through ahead of him before he began to work his bulk through the hole. While it was considerably larger that the last vent access, he still needed to be careful working his bulk through the gap, but on this occasion there was no comedic disasters and once through he was quick to work his way past the access point to allow Giles to replace the cover and seal them in the vent. He was gratified that by the time that Giles had secured the last screw the fresh air running through the vent in a gentle breeze had dissipated the last of the toxic fumes and allowed he and Giles to remove the oxygen masks. For long minutes they lay in the vents, Giles on his side and Zechs stretched out on his back, simply breathing and resting, neither concerned with more than enjoying that simple pleasure. Not only was it a relief to allow their bodies to find some ease from the same movements for so long, it was pleasurable to consider that they no longer would need to drag the bulky oxygen cylinders with them and that they were only a few minutes away from the shuttle bay. “I'll scout the shuttle bay when we reach the vent.” Giles almost purred as he rolled to his back, luxuriating in the movement that stretched muscles too long cramped into specific movements. They were going to need to scout the shuttle bay and determine who, if anyone, was alive there and Zechs merely grunted. He only hoped that the emergency medical shuttle had not been removed from the bay or had its equipment disabled. If they had smashed vital systems then his hope for getting Noin into the life support capsule and stabilized was dead. The nearest other medical facilities was the hospital unit in the sub base. With a sigh Zechs stirred, shifting onto his side without complaint as the light Giles held began to bob around. It was time they moved on and he retrieved his tool belt and the whip, securing them quickly, ignoring the growing pains in his body at the very thought of taking Noin's weight again and settled low on his belly for Giles to work Noin over him again.
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