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"Ferocious Squirrels"Written By: Kaeru Shisho Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Gundam Wing
or its characters, nor do I make any monetary profit off this story. Rating: R Warnings: AU, male/male pairings Pairings: 1x2 Summary: There may be more to Duo
losing his cable connection than gnawing vermin when the repair man
turns out to be attractive and just in the nick of time. "Ferocious Squirrels"
Monday, I'd come home from work, got my beer, turned on the television to catch the news while my microwavable dinner warmed. And I got nothing. Nada. TV screen was a black void, a real one, not one of those metaphorical ones you talk about when you mean that the programing is empty of content above and beyond the mind-numbing variety. "Huh? What's up with cable?" There was an absence of data feed. All was dark and evil looking. I had a bad feeling and knew I wouldn't be watching the soccer match that night. "Damn!" I'd been looking forward to the game all day. It was a replay of the one I missed the day before when I'd gone into the garage-an emergency repair. And I'd managed to avoid overhearing the other grease monkeys give away the outcome! So, I was pissed. This led to the inescapable call to the service company, the terminally long wait: Your call is important to us. Please wait for the next available operator. The vapid questions: Are you sure your cable box is plugged in? Have you changed your controller's batteries? And, finally, when all else had failed, there came the tests for simple "fix-its" doomed to failure: Wiggle the cable? Try turning it off and on again and see if that doesn't solve the problem. It didn't. Nothing did. Nothing would. I needed a technician on the spot. All this activity led to the inevitable appointment with a repair engineer. Lucky for me I only had to wait until the end of the week. Wonderful. I loved missing half a day's work, without pay-which I couldn't really do without- waiting for a repairman. Mondays were bad enough without one more thing, and now Friday, the only marginally non-sucky weekday, would suck, too. I found a sports bar to watch the game-replay and grab a bite to eat. When I got home, I fell into bed. Wind-driven rain beat upon my window. I was glad I had a good job and a place to call my own. I wished I had someone to share my thoughts with, but life wasn't so very terrible, and, if all went well, I wouldn't have a cable-less weekend. Right, what with Sunday being Valentine's Day, and me without anyone to share it with. The day would be bad enough. I didn't want to have to miss the next televised match. And with that comforting thought, I drifted off into slumber land. The week passed unremarkably and Friday finally arrived. Yes, getting my cable television working really was that all-consuming of my attention. My life was that dull, especially since my best friend acquired a boyfriend who monopolized his sporadic free time. I couldn't blame him; I mean, I did, but I know I would have done the same had I been in his place. So, I had time to plan out my Friday. My appointment window was between noon and five, so I put in some hours at the garage, replacing brake pads, and on the way out picked up the book which a customer had left a few years ago and had since rattled around in the shop's Lost and Found box. I figured I'd have lots of time to waste waiting for the repairman to show up at a quarter to five. The collected works of Sherlock Holmes and me were well into the first chapter and I was about to chow down on some salsa and chips- not having thought of picking up something better for lunch on my way home- when I heard a van pull up. "Probably the mail delivery with bills. More wonderful." Checking the mailbox wasn't going to happen. I marked the page in the book with a turned down corner fully intending to take a nap, when there came a polite knock at the door. I opened it to gaze upon a dude about my size and age, and for a moment life was wonderful. The sun shone and I swear I heard birds singing. "Hello. I'm from Intercom Cable Company. I understand you may have a broken cable?" Oh yeah. Come into my den of iniquity you great hunk of delicious manhood. I brushed the tortilla chip dust from my t-shirt like the slob I was but wished I wasn't and blathered, "Oh, yeah, I'm, ah, c'mon in." I couldn't have delivered that any more ineptly. Call me smooth. The handsome man with the messy dark hair and dark blue eyes shook his head and gestured at his mud-caked boots. "I just need access to the outside cable line." "Oh. Okay." I slipped on my shoes and closed the front door behind me on the way out. "This way to the back." I led the way to the side yard, and when we didn't have to shoulder our way through the thicket of weeds that had been here, I felt a wash of pride. I'd recently paid a friend-of-a-friend to clean up around my house. But... even that good feeling was fleeting as the sun rays. The weeds were gone but the yard looked bleak. Hadn't Quatre had told me I'd have roses? That friend of his, the new boyfriend he'd recommended to fix my garden, had planted roses? He had said that. I was sure of it. So where were they? Passing by the new flowerbed, it looked pretty depressing-puddles of muck and twigs. The cable guy scanned the bed. "Roses? You have a large number of them." "I'm not sure what's wrong with them exactly." I had no idea. Roses meant pretty flowers to me, not these bare thorny sticks the gardener had stuck in the ground. "Funny!" The cable man let out a laugh. I'd said the wrong thing. Obviously, I should know they were all dead. "Nothing spring won't be able to fix, right," he said sounding as if he thought I knew this and had been kidding with him, but I must have looked as dumbass blank as I was, because he added as explanation, "When dormancy breaks? Nice varieties. Fragrant. Disease resistant." "Ah..." I had nothing to contribute and had just the wits not to layer my earlier dumbass with ignorance. I trotted behind him as he opened my gate (why did that latch not jam up when he used it?) and set off for the backyard. I had nothing to say about growing roses, but that didn't mean I had nothing to say. I always could find conversation points. "So about the cable line. I got this theory, see, the problem is squirrels. Squirrels and raccoons. They bite the drip-watering hoses, break branches jumping off the roof to get to the fence and now one's broken the cable line." "Unlikely." Ooooh shot down that idea like a cable repair man pro! "Yeah, well, that's what the tree trimmer said," I said, shoring up my defense as best I could. "He was here thinning limbs, messing with the vermin high-wire highway-" "-If the tree trimmer cut the cable," the repair man broke in, "which is the most likely thing that happened, I will know." "You mean he might have lied to me?" I hadn't wanted to throw the blame on Quat's new boyfriend. Quatre spoke highly of the man and talked me into calling him, having him "spiff up" my "gardens", saying he was "the best." Huh. I repeated my accusation, "He lied to me?!" "Possibly. It happens." We stood under the tree and looked up. I could see the cable draped over the upper branches. No doubt about it, the cable was not going to fix itself. "I'll get my tools," cable guy said on his way back to the gate. I would have offered to help, but he didn't seem to need any. He came back with one arm looped about a 12 foot ladder and a large canvas bag hefted over his other shoulder. He made it look effortless. He left the bag at my feet, erected the ladder, and ascended. "Hn." He grunted at the cable. I ogled his ass in his tight uniform khaki slacks until he climbed back down. "What's the verdict?" The cable guy gave me a sweet little half smile that made me weak in the knees. "It's a clean cut. Animals gnaw and leave a ragged rupture." "That makes sense." "Sorry," he said. "Yeah, well, not your fault." I absolved the cable dude. He was just the bearer of bad news. "So, the gardener screwed up and tried to shift the responsibility onto the innocent little squirrels, the shit." "Licensed tree trimmers wouldn't do this." "Right." But screw-up, doing-you-a-favor boyfriends of besties did. "So, what's next? You can fix it?" "Yes. If the cable is damaged by natural causes then the repair is covered free of charge. This was man made. The basic charge is $325. It won't take long for me to complete the repairs." "That much?!" I was struggling with finances currently, pretty much all the time ever since I bought the house. It wouldn't break the bank, but it would seriously cut into my eating-out fund. In a grand show of sensitivity, the cable guy shrugged. "The guy that cut this should pay. Do you want to contact him first?" "I don't know. He's a friend of Quat's." "Cats?" "Not like a kitten. No. He's as evil as a mangy tomcat though." I'd had a bad history with vermin competing with me for the same food-long in my past but ever-present in my memories-making cats and dogs unattractive to me. No warm and fuzzy pet vibes. And as much as I loved my bestie, Quat often interfered in my life in ways that tottered on the edge of demonic. He definitely had a crazy streak. The cable dude was looking at me with a curious- shall I say cute?- look of confusion. What had I been talking about? Oh, yeah. Cats. "Quatre, actually, is his name. He recommended this Trowa dude like he was the God of Gardening." "Trowa? You mean Trowa Barton was cutting your tree?" "Yeah, that's the name. Know him? Is he some scourge of internet cables or something?" I chuckled a bit so he'd know I was joking. And yet, he took me seriously, or looked that way. "Scourge. Yes." Cable guy stared into my eyes, and I gotta say I felt as if he was looking into my soul. Like x-ray eyes gutting me, examining my inner secrets, but leaving no bloody evidence. I shook in my boots. "Then again," he said measuring his words out teaspoon by teaspoon-so I wouldn't choke on the bad news? I expected bad news. I started clearing my throat, which had tightened up for no good reason. My mouth felt dry as dust, too. He waited for me to gather myself before continuing. "The squirrels in this neighborhood have been particularly aggressive." He waved up at the treetop. "Teeth like clippers." And then he flashed me another of those tiny smiles. "Um..." I liked that smile and didn't want to risk making it disappear by jumping to the wrong conclusion. Was he was going to fix the cable for free? I was afraid to ask and suggest an unethical thing, not that I was going to judge him, so I chose to stand there like an idiot. He brought up a hand and simulated snapping teeth with his fingers and thumb. "Grr... snap!" I joined him in a smile and then laughed. "Ferocious squirrels. Choppers like pipe cutters!" He nodded. "Repairing damage due to natural causes is part of your service package," he reiterated and climbed the ladder. How nice of him! I felt all dreamy-like and enjoyed the view. He filled out his work slacks just right going up and just as nicely when he made the trip down to his tool kit, and then back up and down a couple more times. I avoided speculating too much about why he was giving me this special treatment; instead, I blocked it out. It occurred to me that he hadn't told me how he knew my friend's friend, the gardener, Trowa. I preferred watching him work without intruding thoughts, so I shut them out for a few minutes. "I can clear the cable better," he shouted down at me, "cut a few limbs so they won't interfere as they grow or come down in the wind, if you want." I liked his suggestion and jumped on it. "Sure, if you know what you're doing. Thanks!" "More than Trowa," I heard him mutter. I liked this man and his apparent thoughtfulness, but it got me to thinking again. Why had he decided to give me this freebie? What had changed his mind? Was he expecting something from me we hadn't discussed? I was not the type to be beholden to anyone, so when he climbed down the last time and started folding up the ladder, I went for clarification. "Hey, you know, I can swing the bill. I don't want you getting in trouble with the cable company, or anything." And for the first time I saw his confidence break, or at least crack. "I won't get into trouble." He fumbled the fastening on his bag and just grabbed the handles to keep it closed. "It's not your fault." "No, but it wasn't some steel-jawed rodent's fault either." I could dig my heels into the soggy lawn as good as any cable repair man. He looked like I'd run over his dog, all hurting and angry at the same time. I searched for the right words to tell him his dog was fine, just a near miss. Trowa's name hung in the air between us, and then he spoke it. "I know Trowa. He's a friend... my best friend." "No kidding?" The possibilities that came to mind were astounding. Was this Trowa dude seeing both Quat and the cable guy? Was he sabotaging my cable service just to give his friend work? And while I was at it, why roses? I stopped with the guesswork when I noticed the cable guy's dark expression. "Um, is this complicated somehow?" I asked. He nodded. "This was the first time Trowa did any work for you, I take it?" "First and, I promise, last." I wanted to call Quat and tell him what I'd learned about his newest love interest. "And you can warn your boyfriend that he'd better be over the con-job profession. Quat's a lawyer." "He's not my boyfriend," cable guy snapped. Oh yeah, I'd hit a nerve. The news was good, though. "And this isn't a scam to rip you off!" he shouted. He sounded super defensive as he worked out what I'd figured out. But just in case, I walked him through my thought processes. "Sounds like one to me. Cable guy and tree trimmer scope out potentials dupes. Tree guy seduces friend of one sucker, gets a recommendation, damages cable, repair guy gets another job..." I thought it sounded feasible, but it did put me in the positon of the sucker. I was not good with that. "It's not what you think!" he insisted. "No? Then you tell me what's up." And if he didn't go and look me in the eyes and make my knees do that melty thing again. The more fired up he got, the hotter he got. "It was a setup," he said, his voice almost a whisper. That sounded bad. He added, "But not to get me repair business." Well, that had me wondering about other kinds of set ups. "What kind of...? Oh! He set up you and me, the two of us?" He nodded and looked anywhere but at me. "I think so. It's possible." Huh. That wasn't so bad from my point of view. Could be worse? Then I thought it through and saw Quat's influence, meddling, at the heart of the plan. "My friend, Quat, is a plotter supreme. I bet he started it all." Cable guy ran his fingers through his unruly mop. "I may have said something...not on purpose." Hmmm, that sounded intriguing. "Like what exactly?" Couldn't wait to hear this excuse. He looked so uncomfortable I nearly laughed, but that hint of vulnerability was sexy as hell. "Trowa was telling me about this new guy he was dating." Quatre, I wondered; I hoped? "He became... weird... and recited poems about 'flaxen hair of silk and eyes like the sparkling sea'." Heh, heh... yeah. That must have been Quat he was talking about. "Quat can do that to a person. He's a looker and he's got charisma, as they say. Right, well, he was over the moon for your friend, too." "I wanted to be that happy." Oh, God. So did I. So did I. "I resented him. He'd found someone special, and I wished I'd found someone, too... and he called me on it," he revealed. "I know where you're coming from." I tugged at my braid. "I may have let on how envious I was, too. There's no hiding anything from Quat." "So our friends set us up?" he said. "They did," I concluded. "Though it seems introducing us over barbeque would have been simpler." "This was effective." "Yeah," I agreed. This was just too good an opportunity to miss. Someone was going to have to make a move to take it to the next step. Me. "You know, at the risk of giving Quat the satisfaction of having gotten away with one of his schemes, what do think? Have time to get a coffee? We can talk about something besides ferocious squirrel and devious friends." "I have time. This was my last job for the day- the week. Okay," he agreed, looking down at the work order, "Mr. Duo Maxwell." "Thanks, Mr. Cable Guy." I grinned. "Heero Yuy." We shook hands. He had a grip like a weightlifter, but he let up before my hand was crushed meat. And I was being reeled in! Crushed into his chest! And before I could do more than open my mouth, he kissed me! Yeah. He slipped a hand at the back of my neck, so I couldn't lurch away, I guess, and massaged. All I could think was: That was nice. My brain was spinning away when he left off. I blinked, brought him into focus, and gradually released the grip I'd had on his tool belt. "I've wanted to do that since I saw you at the door," he said. He did not look like he was the least bit sorry he'd done that without permission. "Oh yeah? Well..." Well what? "Warn me next time." I could feel the heat on my face and decided not to over think things, now that my week was definitely looking up. "Lock up your equipment and let's go. It's a couple blocks away." "Okay." As we started out on our walk, he leaned close and confided, "I'm glad we're past that stressful 'will he, won't he part', aren't you?" "Oh, yeah. Now we're in that 'will we, won't we' stretch." I intended that to sound flippant. But then he slowed down and turned to give me an appraising look. "I have no doubt we will... sooner or later." He winked and chuckled at my stunned expression. Stunned, but thrilled. Sooner was better than later, for sure. I had this feeling about him, a good one. "There is no instinct like that of the heart," he said, reading my mind," Lord Byron wrote that." He smiled at me and added, "I read it on a card." "A greeting card?" "Yes, a Valentine's Day card. That's coming up." "Yeah. One of the mechanics at the Howard's garage-that's where I work-was talking about taking his wife out-making reservations." A new thought occurred to me, something else to run-through my mind. Something I could do to make the most of this setup, build it up into more of a date. "Here's the coffee shop." He didn't care what he drank, saying "Just whatever you have." So I ran with my bright idea and made a special order; that is, I ordered the special, and waited for it at the counter while he found us a table. One thing about ordering the special, it tends to be fast. I watched the coffee master do his magic with the foamy milk, while the rest of the order was stacked on a tray. When the coffee drinks were shoved in there someplace, I weaved my way through the chairs and people, carrying it to our table. "What have you got there?" Heero asked me, interested- if I correctly read his eager, hungry look as he examined the serving dish hovering near his head. "Today's special. It's a little early for dinner, but I'm starving. Hope you don't mind." He didn't. "I missed lunch," he admitted and helped me with the tray, removing a plate stacked with tea sandwiches and another layered with small cakes and cookies. I set a mug of latte at his place, the other at mine then returned the tray to the counter. I could see him smiling into his cup on my trek back. The shop was crowding up as folks got off work. "It's a good bake shop and they roast their own coffee," I explained. "So, ah-" I hesitated, caught up in the smile on his face. His eyes met mine and he pointed to the cup. The foam on the coffee formed a heart shape. "Yes," he said. "I'll be your Valentine. Will you be mine?" My heart skipped a beat. Wow! "Yeah, sure! Heh, heh, and I have ferocious squirrels to thank for my good fortune." "That's makes a better story than owing Barton." "Or Quat." I groaned, imagining his smug face glowing with the knowledge that he'd done good. Trowa probably had a similar self-satisfied performance he'd play out with his friend. "We cannot let them know their plan worked." "Secret Valentines then?" he asked. "That's going to be hard, but yeah... until April Fool's Day?" I suggested. "Will we have a surprise for them by that time?" "Oh, yeah. I plan to, if you're game?" It would mean we'd have reasons to get together many more times in the near future. I think he got that part of what wasn't said but was just hinted at, because his smile widened. "Mission accepted." The End. Happy Valentine's Day to you all!
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