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"Mixed Blessings a Cat Tail "Written By: Kaeru Shisho Disclaimer: I don't own any part of Gundam Wing
or its characters, nor do I make any monetary profit off this story. Rating: NC 17 Warnings: AU, male/male pairings of a most ridiculous
nature; told from Quatre's point of view, so beware the fluff. Pairings: 1x2, 3x4 Summary: The GW boys are all cats finding their little paws in the big, bad world. For Dyna Dee. A/N: The author needs her head examined, as does
her friend and editor, Waterlily, who suggested it, but I wrote it
just the same in order to make you laugh and as an eleven chapter
gift to Dyna Dee! " Mixed Blessings a Cat Tail " See
the Cat, See the Cradle? Chapter 9 - Catnapped Each of my friends peeled off from the group as we passed his home: first Wufei at his ponds, then Duo, Heero, and lastly Mill wished me a good night at the hedge dividing our properties. I thought I'd be tired, but when I reached my laundry room bed, I found myself too warm and restless to settle down. I tiptoed to the kitchen, where I found my dinner, partly mauled by the dog, so I only ate around the edges, and my water, with a dog hair floating in it. After taking some refreshment, I wandered quietly into the front room. Rashid was sleeping, head under one wing on his perch with the cotton cover halfway over the side. It was warm, then, not just me, or he'd be completely covered. The dog was stretched out on the cool tiles in the entry, sleeping, thankfully. I climbed up my window perch where I could look out into the night, and there I thought back to my very busy day. Trowa, sigh. The running, the catnip, the pipe tunnel, the circus, but no matter what the activity or the diversion, Trowa persisted uppermost in my mind. I missed his voice, his reassurances, the scent of the wild that clung to his fur, his sweet tongue licks. When I tried very hard, I imagined the rough tongue gently scratching my ear. And then I must have fallen asleep. "There you are!" Miss Iria's cry woke me immediately, which was a good thing, because I only had seconds to retract my claws before I was rising off my perch and being cuddled tightly in her arms. Musn't scratch the mistress or it would be off to the groomer for me to get clipped! "I was so worried when you didn't eat dinner and I couldn't find you anywhere. Where did my sneaky little kitty cat run off to? Look at the burrs in your fur! You're not sleeping in in the hedgerows, are you darling?" Dear me, what was Miss Iria going to do to me, besides the brushing I knew would come my way? I could see that instrument in her hand already. A thorough sprucing could come next, including a, gasp, bath! "There, you look much better now." Oh, I have to admit it felt nice having her comb out the snarls and scratch all the right spots. When it came to checking my claws, though, I had to think quickly. I didn't want her to discover how they had grown. "You are such a pet," she told me in what was practically a purr. I licked her finger tips and snuggled and distracted her until she laughed and carried me into the kitchen. "Why you smell like livestock, I can't guess, but there's no time to get you to Alice's today." That was the groomer. I was safe for another day! Food! My favorite tender meat was there already in my bowl! But so was the dog. He even growled as I drew near. "Ruggles! Be nice! You know whose food this is - it's Cat's (although I could hear Trowa's voice telling me it was really 'Quat' that she was saying, I still felt it as' C-A-T') food bowl. Now go away. Oh, all right... Tam! Yes, you heard me. Get in here, now. I warned you... Ruggles is doing it again! Take your dog out of here! Now!" It was the dog's turn to be swept off his feet and carried away, accompanied by a great deal of grumbling from Mr. Tam. A tiny sadness darkened my heart, but not for long. As much as I liked being Miss Iria's favorite, I liked eating in peace with the dog gone even more. I had friends now and Trowa. I was no longer dependent on Miss Iria for all my happy moments. When I had finished eating and drinking, fully appreciative of finding clean, cool water in my dish (horse troughs were acceptable in a pinch, as were koi ponds) , I strolled the house looking it over for changes. There were none, except that Miss Iria and the dog were outside. "There you are!" piped the macaw from the front room, truly parroting our mistress. "I was worried... I wondered if you'd ever return." "Aw, you missed me, Rashid!" "We all did." "Ha! Not the dog." "Even the dog. He had nothing to chase but his own silly tail so he moped about." "I'm not sorry one bit." "You explored?" "I did!" "If you can leave out the word 'Trowa' for a minute, I would like to hear your story. To begin, tell me about horses." My poor friend. I know how he yearned for the world outside. "I didn't see one in the field, but I drank from a horse trough. The water was already mostly gone, or I would have soaked my fur!" I leaped into the tale of my day and night, leaving out the scary chase part, and Rashid supplied the "oohs and aahs". I only mentioned Trowa when it was important, like when I described the circus, which he didn't really understand, I could tell, but I tried to emphasize the horses running circles in the ring wearing feather head dresses. "Horse-feathers? Nonsense! They aren't birds," he opined, pleased to have known better than I did about the animal kingdom. I didn't attempt to correct his viewpoint, and, lastly, when pressed for the complete story, I told him about our near-miss with the humans. He was very concerned that men tried to catch us. "You should remain indoors for a few days. We don't know where they came from or what they were hunting, but if it is white long-haired cats-?" "Duo suggested that we all 'lay low' too. I think I could sleep all day, so it won't be a problem." "Ah, that is a wise choice. It's good to have a civil conversation again. That dog is a moron and Miss Iria and Mr. Tam argued more than once. She is not happy." "I'm sorry. Well, I'm back now so they can stop fighting," I said, knowing I was the cause of everyone's unhappy lives. I felt very sorry to have made them sad, but I couldn't help feeling so very pleased for myself. Long legs, leaping, running, a warm, rough tongue... Trowa. Sleep. My window seat felt perfect, the sun heating the glass and radiating it back all afternoon. I left my perch only once to drink and use the sandbox, and by dinner time I was starving. Arf! Arf! Arf! And so on... The dog must have been bored to death to have nothing better to do than chase me to the food bowl. I leaped to the counter out of harm's reach and hissed. The dog skidded into my water bowl, upsetting it, then stepped into my food bowl and sending the dry kibbles flying. Now, what would I eat?! My temptation was to jump down and bat that silly dog's yappy face to silence, when the door from the garage opened. Miss Iria came home to the racket of the dog barking at me wedged in between the coffeemaker and the toaster. I knew the counter tops and table tops were off-limits to me, and I'd never dared to break this rule, but that dog unnerved me this time, and now I was stuck. "Ruggles! Bad dog! Look at what you've done! The mess!" And if those words dolling out doggy-shame weren't a balm to my soul, the next were pure intoxicants. I shook with a sudden shiver of thrill and joy as Miss Iria's arms enclosed me in a loving circle of safety. "And poor Cat (which was Quat!). There, there... No food? You'll get your favorite. But where should I put it where you'll be unmolested? Ah, here on my desk." I loved my new eating place! The desk was really just a continuation of the kitchen counter, but with a cutout in the cabinetry for a stool. The best part was the window. I could eat and gaze into the back garden, and with only a few more of Miss Iria's newspapers, I could make a splendid nest to nap on. I was glad I'd held my ground, stood up to the dog and made my plight obvious to Miss Iria. I felt so, so... grown up! Wouldn't Trowa love it up here, I wondered to myself? I imagined the two of us snuggled together, food a paw's length away, sharing a litter box, and the luxury of having all the time in the world to nap. He could help me do away with the dog. Yes. I was positive he would be a big help to me. Then I heard the scraping of craggy claws on the floor and a yelp. The yelp was from the dog, exiting the room quickly. The other noise came from dear Rashid. The dog was terrified of him, having lost several clumps of fur to Rashid's sharp, edifying pecks, and had disappeared into another part of the house- quietly, too. Oh, poor Rashid! He had no roost of his own in that room and he wanted to spend time with me, so there he was hobbling and scrabbling his way into the kitchen. "I see," he declared, glaring up at me from the floor. "I protest this situation most plainly." "I'll share!" I said. "I very much disapprove of your being gifted with a new window seat, while I, the watchful eye of the household, am not!" He pulled out two tail feathers and waved them around. And he squawked and screeched something terrible as he dropped the pretty bright feathers in a fit of frustration. "I needed a place to eat," I explained. When I heard no remarks from Rashid, I looked out over the edge and saw the magnificent bird testing the rungs of the stool leg, I made a guess, for reachability "You're trying to climb up to the desk. That looks difficult," I told him. "It requires concentration. Wings are intended for flight. If I could fly, young kit, I would own every curtain rod!" "Oh, I'm sure you would and the top of the refrigerator, too!" "No doubt. Now, I shall find my way up there. Look at this, a ladder." "Look at you!" He had lit upon a way to get up and I was very proud of his achievement. Yes, he had claws and a beak that could snap bones, but he had only two limbs for climbing. What he did have, he used wondrously, I thought. With expert precision, he hooked his beak onto the wood ledge, catching it just so, and then leveraged himself up until one leg could catch hold. "That's amazing!" I offered him all the encouragement I could. "What a strong neck you have! You're almost there!" Once he'd established that foothold, he had only to pull up. I gave him a little push with a paw, which he pretended not to need and ignored. When he had both feet securely on the desk, I invited him to share my look-out spot. "Come see the view out the window!" "I will after I take a moment for refreshments." I had no idea what he could be talking about until I saw him pluck a single round fruit from the bowl on the counter. "What's that?" "A grape. You wouldn't like them." I wrinkled my nose at the smell when he bounced back to the desk, holding the nasty fruit and undulating with it while standing far too close to my nose. "Eew! Eat it then!" I couldn't watch him tear it apart and slurp down the wet parts. It looked a little like eating an eyeball. "And don't leave the skin here." "It dries up." "I don't want the mess." "Very well." I was scanning the edges of the lawn when he took care of the detritus, probably flicking the bits to the floor. I didn't care much as long as it wasn't in my space. Yucky fruit. "Finicky like the missus—"I think I heard the bird mutter, but when he returned to my side he said louder, "Ah, that is a pleasant view of the garden." "Yes, it is." And so we sat together, Rashid and I, watching the butterflies flicker about the flowers, the dragonflies buzz past the shallow rock that Miss Iria always kept brimming with fresh water, and the occasional bird drop to the rock's edge and sip. If only Trowa would just materialize in the trees. Like magic. I'd give up my new favorite spot in a heartbeat to be with him. If he came. I stared and stared, but he didn't appear. I know we napped most of the day, because the sun had moved when next I blinked. "What's moving back there?" I asked my half-awake friend. Of course the first thing I thought of was 'it might be Trowa!' "Eh?" Rashid squawked in a drowsy sounding voice. He blinked and looked harder. "Who? What? Oh! That's Randy Bandito." Rashid pinned me with a hard stare. "He is probably out hunting for food." "But he only goes out at night," I argued. Actually I was disappointed that it wasn't a certain handsome cat, but then I remembered my promise to the raccoon. "Oh! Oh, dear! I completely forgot to take him anything!" How could I have forgotten my responsibility to a friend?! I vaulted from the window seat over the desk and to the floor, only to remember that Miss Iria was filling my dry food bowl at the desk now. "How silly of me! I'm getting awfully forgetful!" I leaped to the desk in time to see Rashid carefully pushing my bowl toward me. "Don't forget this," he muttered. I felt very foolish. If only I could quash all thoughts of Trowa out of my head, there'd be room for other important things! There was no remonstrance I could come up with that was fitting, so I took it like a big cat. "Thank you." It was hard getting the bowl down without spilling most of the contents. I remembered where the food bag was stored and how Duo and Heero scooped into it. I found I could fill the bowl with no mess, which made me feel good, and that I could carry it out through the garage and out the cat door without losing much at all. The moment I pushed out the door, I heard the rumbling of Randy's voice. "You're okay!" I had to set the bowl down to talk and didn't want to do that on the patio, giving me plenty of time to wallow in guilty thoughts. What a terrible friend I'd become! I deserved the evil dog invading my home and stealing my food and my mistress! "No need to hurry," the raccoon crooned close to my ear. He seemed to understand my bowl-in-mouth-can't-talk dilemma and just fell in line beside me as I headed for the shed. "Watch your step through the turf." Why was he being so understanding and nice? Why didn't he just tell me how bad I'd been?! "There!" I said, licking away the taste of plastic bowl and meaty kibble. "I'm so sorry I missed this. I won't do it again!" "Hey, it's okay, buddy. Relax. I saw you take off with those other cats and figured you'd be doing the town for a few days. Don't worry 'bout ole Randy. I've been doin' for myself for a long time." "You are too kind," I told him. He may have been doing for himself, but he probably hadn't been doing well because he ate my offering with gusto. "I want to bring you a treat, something... special, but I'm not sure what you like to eat." "Oh, I eat..."he paused to swallow his mouthful, "I eat most anything I can find: bugs, trash cans have interesting things... fruit in season—" "Fruit! Yes, I can get you that! Wait here. I'll be right back!" He seemed perfectly content to stay put and eat, so I raced back to the kitchen. "Rashid! I need a fruit for Randy! Something I can carry." The orange he rolled off the ledge was horrid tasting. I couldn't bite it to carry it at all. My mouth burned! "Grapes are nice. Just hold them by the stem," he advised me. The stem was okay. I could bite that and lift the delicate round balls off the ground. "Thank you!" I left him behind again as I pranced with my fruit, but I could hear his sigh and comment: "Such a waste... on a raccoon." "Well, wouldya look at that. Now, that there is a real treat, Cat, a real treat. Thank you." Randy did look very pleased. "I think I'll take this back to my shed where I can enjoy it at my leisure." "Yes, please do," I told him. "You don't eat little dogs , do you?" "Live ones? No. No I don't." What if I arranged for it to be dead first, I nearly asked aloud. I didn't, though! "Oh, well," I sighed, "that's... okay. It's nearly time for Miss Iria to come home and I shouldn't like her to see you out and about." "No, that wouldn't be good. Well, good to have you back, Cat. See you 'round." "Tomorrow, Randy!" I shouted at his receding back. That evening when Miss Iria returned from work, she seemed surprised to find Rashid sitting at my side in the kitchen window. He winced when she called him "a darling", but I knew he loved it by the way he pressed his head into her hand and clucked. "Oh, you lost your beautiful tail!" She cried out and I wasn't sure if she actually shed tears. She smoothed the pretty feathers between her fingertips. "I must frame these," she said in a soft coo that made me feel all gooey inside, and probably Rashid, too, because he began to sing to her in a rattling voice. To his delight, the next day she bought him a proper wood perch that fit on the desk and attached a ramp from the floor to the desk, making the climb up far easier. Rashid was touched. His gaze often lingered on the new picture hanging nearby which showcased the two brilliantly hued feathers he'd plucked from his tail in a fit of temper. We loved the kitchen window seat. It provided us a view of the back garden and less sun in the morning than the front room. From there, I watched for signs of my friends returning. As it turned out, Duo and Heero stayed away for two days and we never saw Wufei or Mill all week- or, sadly, Trowa, not that I'd been expecting him to appear, but I'd hoped he would. Even then, my friends didn't visit me for long. The temperature was very hot out during the day and we all wanted to nap rather than go adventuring. By nightfall, things had cooled some, but Odin had resorted to locking Heero in his lab again. "New locks that Heero can't tamper with," Duo added with a snort, "or me." "He believes I am out 'tomcatting' and is afraid I'll be run over by a car," Heero revealed. "Well, he's right, in a way," Duo muttered and Heero glared at him. "Damn, it's too hot for me. I gotta go find me a fan." I hated to see them go. They hadn't stopped by for more than a couple minutes. I gave him my most effective begging face. "Please, a little longer?" "Don't you go giving me the stink-eye, Kitty-cat," Duo laughed. "I'm heading home." Heero followed him, keeping to the shadows, until they'd both disappeared over the fence. There was nothing left but to... follow a hopping cricket! The little thing was dark brown, plain, fatter and slower than a grasshopper and generally boring. And then... snap! It was gone! Eaten by a snake! Duo once described a snake as "a tail with attitude," and loved to chase them in the grass. I know Trowa liked chasing mice and went for the tail first; he had no compunction against snacking on a snake, if he could catch one. It was a captivating thing and I really couldn't not leap for it. Instincts were terrible. They drove you to do uncivilized things. They made one act before thinking, even if it was against one's better judgment. I'd fought my baser drives, and, so far, had been able to curtail the killing of smaller animals. But the snake was too much. I simply felt I had to have it! I wouldn't need to kill it! I would definitely not eat it; I'd just play! It slithered across the grass quick as a fish in water. I jumped and it passed through my paws like water. I sprang and it whipped around, changing direction faster than I could, but I kept it within sight and dashed after it. Looming ahead was the hedge separating my territory from that of Relena and Mill. I had a split second to wonder how she was doing with Trowa and whether or not I might see Mill, and then I was yanking at fur snarling in the twigs, pushing forward, and breaking through the shrubbery. "Oh!" I cried out in frustration as I watched the snake disappear into a hole in the ground safely out of my reach. The pretty lawn stretched for miles, it seemed. Neat and trim. Very plain, I thought, and not at all as interesting as Miss Iria's garden. I took my time sniffing for strangers. There was a whiff of squirrel, cat, Relena and her brother's musky scent, other older smells I couldn't identify, and people, humans. I remembered how peacefully she'd slept at the circus, reclined on a nest of simple straw in the presence of six un-neutered male cats. That was strange wasn't it? Why all those males were uninterested in a very pretty, young female cat? Why, Duo and Heero showed each other far more affection... oh. Maybe they didn't need a female. Could that be? Wufei seemed terribly attracted to Mill, and I couldn't deny my own feelings or the fact that Trowa was driven to protect me. I'd have to think that over more. And I didn't think it was the sort of thing I should bring up around Rashid. He sang sad songs of lost loves, lovely girl birds all. The cicadas hummed in the trees overhead; weedy-looking trees, I thought, that had grown up within the hedge and been ignored. Despite the sun, I felt cool air from the grass where there was a bit of shade, and there I spent most of my time, looking for anything interesting and hoping that I might get to see Mill. I didn't even consider approaching the manor house. Heero had drubbed his rules into me and one was to stay clear of houses that were not mine, and so I skirted the hedge. The buzzing of bees hunting the tiny white flowers mostly hidden in the shrubs acted like balm to my senses. My eyelids drooped. "Best I go home," was my last intelligent thought, followed closely by, "Heero's a little too paranoid, I think. This spot in the hedge will do nicely." The next thing I heard was the sound of a feet stepping on dry leaves close to my ear. Then came darkness! I was wide awake and able to tell I'd been covered by a canvas bag, when an instant later I felt a queasiness in my stomach and I was being lifted off the ground. I twisted and turned, trying my hardest to right myself, feet down, in the bag. I breathed hard, close to panic so I only heard part of what my captors were saying. "-Think it's the one that they were looking for-?" "—could be a stray—" "—reward for this one—" It was enough, though, to let me know I was in big trouble. The men trapped me while I was sleeping thinking I was Relena, probably. Once they discovered I wasn't the cat they were looking for, would they set me free? I was wearing a collar with my name on it! Trowa had read it! I couldn't rely on these men being able to read, though. I scrabbled at the bag, trying to snag a nail on a loose thread and rip an opening to fall through. Why oh why hadn't I heeded Heero's warnings and gone back home? "Never nap in a strange territory. Travel with a buddy." Heero was a survivor. It looked like I was not. Even bouncing blindly I could tell I hadn't been carried far—to the manor house, I guessed. "Mr. Khushrenada will be here shortly," came a sharp woman's voice. "You, get a cage!" A cage?! Oh, no! I squirmed around to free myself again, but the fabric was tough; my claws just slipped and scratched. I couldn't get a grip to tear. "This one's a fighter," I heard someone say. Then came a deeper man's voice, mellow and low asking, "What have we here?" I froze, my muscles locked in fear as something his voice, nice as it had seemed at first, chilled me to my bones. I guessed this must be the dreaded Treize Khushrenada. Relena's frightened words came back to me from the last time I'd seen her. She had warned us all of the dangers of the breeding program housed in the manor. What a stupid cat I was! I squinted from the glare of lights in my eyes as the bag peeled away. A firm hand gripped me by the back of my neck while others held me on my back, a very uncomfortable position exposing my vulnerable underside. "—too nice to be abandoned. Let's see what the collar says... Ah, yes, one of the Winner's. Just as I thought. I've been dying to get one of their treasured Birmans, but those people never sell. All kept in the family. And this one has a royal pedigree, I'm sure." I tried biting the hand at my neck, but all I could do was bare my teeth. "He's got spirit," the woman's voice said. "Think he's breedable?" "We can check now." "Luckily, checking to see if a male cat has been neutered is easier than checking to see if a female cat has been spayed," Krushrenada said. He sounded as if he were instructing a child. I hated him. I wondered if everyone working for him thought this was right to do? "Watch and learn. Simply hold the cat so that he's lying on his back with his stomach up. Now, if you would please, Lady Une, part the fur in his lower abdomen area so that you have a view of his testicles." Oh! I did not like being fondled there! Those were my privates and these humans had no right, no right at all! I squirmed and twisted, but that just made the hands hold me until it hurt, so I stopped. "- Take the testicle area in your hands gently. Are they large and hard?" NO! Too hard! "Yes, they are,' the woman replied and then, thankfully, let go of me. "Very good news, then. This cat is not neutered. If they feel like soft sacks of fur, your cat has most likely been neutered." "No, he's intact. So, we keep him?" "Let's see if we can get him mated with a few of our females first, and then, if successful, we might see about arranging a trade with our neighbor. I'm sure this cat belongs to her and she will be positively frantic that he's gone and will pay just about any price to get him back." "There are a couple females in heat," the woman said. "This one's young and probably never mated. We should find a more experienced female, but one not too old." "There's the grand-daughter of the Duke line- a five generation pedigree." "Dotty, yes, splendid choice. Here, take, ah... Quatre, here and put him in with her. Watch them! She often strikes out at a new male." What?! Oh, no! Again, I fought frantically, but ineffectively. These people knew how to restrain unwilling cats. I was carried through the house, with rooms larger than any I'd ever seen. Past a pair of heavy double-doors into a pristine, white room lined with cages and filled with the scent of cats and the sounds of cats, and the eyes of many, many white cats all glued to me. I let out the most unholy yowl I could, good and loud. Mill had to be someplace! He was my only hope now for rescue. "Miiiiiiiiiiiiill!" TBC
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