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"The Road to Hell is Paved With Second Chances "Written By: Jewel of Hell Disclaimer: Don't own nothin' but these words Rating: NC 17 Warnings: Yaoi, lemon, angst (sort of), abuse, torture, memory loss, mental instability, character death, violence, dark Pairings: 1x2 Summary: The war ended, and Duo disappeared. Heero
never stopped searching. When he found his love, locked in a research
facility with devestated memories, he swore he would destroy the one
responsible. "The Road to Hell is Paved With Second Chances "
Chapter Eleven Duo woke with a start, not sure what had disturbed his sleep. It came a moment later: unfamiliar sounds in equally unfamiliar surroundings. Alarm didn't quite filter into his foggy mind, because he could immediately see Heero. His lover (his lover!) was awake, watching him with tender eyes. Yawning, Duo stretched and looked around. "Mm, where are we?" Judging by the light coming in from the window, it was either late morning or early afternoon. "This is my apartment," Heero replied, sitting up. He smiled. "You fell asleep on the way, and I didn't have the heart to wake you." Duo looked around with interest. "It's a little spartan in here, isn't it?" A faint smile tugged at Heero's lips. "We can fix that easily enough. Now that I have you back, we can decorate to both our tastes." Giggling, Duo sat up and cuddled against Heero's chest. "Why do I have the feeling it will be to my tastes pretty much entirely?" Heero squeezed until Duo yelped around his laughter. "It's functional," he said, looking around with a critical eye. "Yeah, if functional means boring. What are we doing today, Hee-ro?" "Meeting our friends," Heero replied. "They've all been worried about you, and I think you're ready to become reacquainted." It was comforting, Duo reflected, how Heero spoke as if Duo's memory loss was just some trivial thing. It erased any possible insecurities, restoring a sense of confidence. So even though he was nervous about meeting people he'd known once and forgotten, he wasn't scared or worried. He smiled, nuzzling his nose under Heero's chin. "I'm looking forward to it. Heck, Trowa helped us escape . . ." Duo faltered, swallowing a little thickly, then continuing. ". . .escape the facility, so the others hafta be good guys, too." Heero kissed the bridge of his nose. "They are." Duo abruptly remembered the dream he'd been having, right before he woke. He was pretty sure it was a contributing factor. He couldn't really remember much about the dream, but he could remember an intense feeling. "During the war, did you . . . try to kill yourself?" Heero gave him a surprised look. "No. Yes, but not in the way you're asking. I self-destructed Wing. I almost died, actually it was Trowa who found me and saved my life. I didn't try to committ suicide, but I wasn't worried about dying." "Yeah . . ." Duo murmured, resting his head against Heero's chest. "I remember asking you if you had wanted to die." "I certainly expected to," Heero replied in a strange voice. "That was the last conversation we had before you disappeared." Duo squeezed his eyes shut. The girl Relena's face immediately appeared behind his eyelids. He still had a hard time wrapping his mind around what she'd done. He couldn't imagine being so hateful and petty he would try to destroy someone just because of jealousy. If Heero loved someone else, Duo would be heartbroken, but he wouldn't . . . He sighed. He wondered if he could convince Heero to let him kill the little bitch. He knew as intense as his hatred of her was, Heero's was a special kind of hate. "Can we not get up yet?" he asked, wriggling until he slid down between Heero's thighs. "Can we just fuck around for awhile?" Heero gave him a startled look, then burst into warm laughter. Duo once again got the distinct feeling Heero rarely laughed. His entire insides warmed tremendously. Heero got a handle on his mirth almost reluctantly. That question was just so typical Duo. Bad language, lazy behavior, whiny voice, and begging eyes. "Well, now," he teased, "the term 'fuck around' could have a few different connotations. It could be you want to play poker in bed? Or just lay around until we're all stiff and sore? Or-" "I mean as in having sex, soldier," Duo said with a displeased expression. "You, me, naked, certain parts of your anatomy grinding inside certain parts of mine-" Snorting, Heero silenced the impudent mouth with a kiss. "Enough with your vulgar talk," he commanded when he broke away. Duo looked flushed and breathless already. "Then find a way to put my mouth to better use, soldier-boy," he purred. Heero's body temperature raised a few degrees. The thought of Duo submitting, yielding . . . three days ago it would have seemed wrong to him. Sick. But this was his Duo, brash and headstrong and unafraid and cocky and reckless. Somehow without any help, Duo had come back to him. So he fused their mouths together aggressively, knowing Duo could take it. Wouldn't break. Duo needed very little prompting to get naked. Heero's eyes greedily drank in all that pale skin on display, devouring the long lines of his body that were still too thin but still utterly beautiful. Duo was a work of art. His hair, falling loose around him, formed a gleaming halo of cinnamon fire. Indigo eyes burning with lust, Duo crawled forward on the bed until he'd forced Heero onto his back. There would be, Heero thought dimly, plenty of chances for him to get what he wanted. Right now it was too easy to submit to what Duo wanted, so when Duo whispered to him in a sultry voice not to move, he obeyed. Firm, full, and slightly moist lips pressed a kiss right on the crown of his burgeoning arousal. Heero's eyes slid shut, raising his knees and planting his feet on the bed. The position could potentially give him too much power of movement, but he trusted his own control more than that. Duo wrapped his arms around Heero's upper thighs as he stretched out on the bed, and Heero felt the movement of his lips on his skin as he whispered, "Open your eyes, Hee-ro. Watch me." Raising himself up on his elbows, Heero gazed down the line of his own body at Duo. Shit he felt he could almost come just at the look in those dark eyes. That wasn't the face of a broken shell. It was the expression of a boy who knows exactly who he is and what he wants. Which was, at the moment, Heero Yuy. Duo licked his lips and lowered his head, eyes never leaving Heero's. It took a great deal of self-control not to close his eyes when those lips wrapped around the tip of Heero's length and a sinful tongue flicked out. The touches were light and fleeting, not quite firm enough to do more than tease. Heero, who could exercise inhuman control, gritted his teeth and didn't move or say a word. As much as he would like this to finish quickly and in a satisfying manner, the sight and the significance were such that he didn't want this to end. Duo released Heero to lick the hardened flesh. Now he merely feathered his lips across, butterfly kisses. Now his teeth nibbled ever-so-lightly over the throbbing vein. One of Duo's warm hands massaged gently around the base, and finally Duo opened his mouth to take Heero back into that warm, damp cavern. The heat, the slippery glide of tongue on flesh was incredible. Now that tongue dipped into the small slit as if curious to Heero's taste, and Heero had to close his eyes when the flat of Duo's tongue swept firmly over the tip. "Mmm," Duo purred, and the vibrations about made Heero jump out of his skin. Then, apparently, Duo was done playing. His mouth slid down on Heero until he felt himself hit the back of Duo's throat, and those muscles swallowed him down. Duo tried to imagine being brave enough to do this even a few days ago. Strangely, it felt as if his terrible experiences in that lab were the distant past. Or even someone else's past. Where was that debilitating fear? That constant alertness, watchfulness, and waiting? No, Duo felt fearless and alive. As if it hadn't even happened to him, or were as hazy as a dream. How had that happened? Was it because Heero loved him? For a moment he entertained the notion of Heero not being there. The thought frightened him, but it wasn't a mind-gripping panic. He thought he would be okay even if alone. At the moment, there were more important things. He swiped his tongue over the head of Heero's rather impressive arousal, eager for more of the taste of his lover. The thought of doing this for anyone else repulsed him, but because it was Heero he loved it. Apparently, having Heero anywhere inside him was intensely arousing. It was an interesting discovery. He was hard as a rock even though he hadn't so much as touched himself. Relaxing his throat muscles as much as he could, he slid his mouth down Heero's length until he felt the head touch the back of his throat. It was uncomfortable. He couldn't breathe like this. He ignored it. Swallowing hard, he concentrated only on giving his lover pleasure. Heero was utterly enraptured. The look on Duo's face was just as arousing as what his mouth was doing. Those dark eyes were gazing into his with so much love, so much trust it was maddening. It made him want to ravish this gem to within an inch of his life. To hold onto him and chase off anyone who got close. To kill anyone who so much as thought about hurting Duo. Was there anyone in the universe more amazing than his love? Duo's lips, thinned out from stretching so wide, wrapped around him in a beautiful red ring. Those pale cheeks hollowed out as Duo sucked, still swallowing, and Heero almost came. He fought it off, definitely not ready for this to be over. Duo did it again, harder this time, and Heero couldn't quite stop his hips from jerking up. He could see it startled Duo, could feel his throat muscles trying to reject the sudden invasion. But when Heero immediately tried to withdraw, Duo held him in place. Heero hissed out a gasp. Duo's eyes were giving him permission, telling him he trusted him, that it was all right. Tangling his fingers in Duo's hair, he gently tugged until his lover released him and came up so he could kiss him. Tasting his own essence along with Duo's flavor was strange and arousing. Then he slowly pushed Duo down to the bed again so he was lying on his back. Getting to his hands and knees, he lined himself up with Duo's mouth, teasing those full lips with the head until they were covered with a glossy shine. Duo's eyes glittered, sultry and teasing. "This is kinda kinky," he murmured, opening his mouth. Heero slid back in slowly. This position, quite different from the other, had its own merits. Once again Duo was at Heero's mercy, and once again he felt strangely safe. As Heero slipped into his mouth he relaxed his throat, trusting Heero wouldn't lose control and hurt him. Those cobalt eyes were watching him with avid attention, making him feel too hot, beautiful, powerful. Odd, definitely. He could see what Heero wanted to do, but knowing he wouldn't do it left him feeling sort of dazzled by Heero's sheer strength. Heero slowly rolled his hips, moving as if he weren't fucking Duo's mouth, and Duo's body quivered with the memory of it. That thick, hot length filling him. Opening him up. Burrowing deep and forcing him to accept it. Claiming him. Now he was doing it again. But his movements were longer and slower now, still aware of how easy it would be to hurt Duo, lust gleaming in his eyes. It was the most erotic experience of his life. Reaching up, he kneaded the backs of Heero's thighs, loving the feel of silken muscle flexing and bunching under his hands. Heero never varied that long, slow, leisurely tempo, his eyes never leaving Duo's. Quickly getting the hang of his rhythm, Duo swallowed every time Heero pulsed down. Eventually, as the pleasure grew in Heero's eyes, he could not deny it any longer. He pulled back when the first stream flooded out, and Duo eagerly swallowed. Some of it spilled past his lips, streaking down his jaw. The thick fluid coated his tongue and throat, the heavy flavor so intrinsically Heero . . . Heero went down on his elbows as he rode out his orgasm, and Duo couldn't ever remember seeing anything more beautiful than Heero's face in the throes of passion. And to know he'd been the cause was almost enough to push him over the edge right along with his lover. For several moments Heero remained still, legs quivering slightly, while Duo licked him clean. Then Heero pulled back, falling to his side and directing Duo to roll over onto his stomach. Duo's eyelids fluttered when a warm hand smoothed down his spine, following the curve and slipping into the cleft. "There's something I want to do," Heero murmured, leaning forward and nibbling around the shell of Duo's ear. "It might be a little . . . different, at first, but I think you'll like it. Will you let me?" Duo couldn't immediately think of anything that would feel weird-how could anything Heero would do to him?-but his curiosity easily got the better of him and he nodded. "I trust you." Heero kissed his temple, then brushed all Duo's hair off his back to the side. Tiny shivers broke over his skin at the ticklish sensation. Heero's lips fastened to the back of his neck, dropping biting kisses all over the warmed skin. It wasn't quite enough to sting, and it felt good. Those wet kisses trailed all the way down his spine, into every dip and valley, to where flesh rose again in a graceful arch, and Heero didn't stop. Duo's eyes widened at the invasive, intensely erotic feeling of of Heero's tongue sliding between his cheeks, sweeping into the heat. Heero's hands felt hot as they gripped and spread him open, now exposing him to the cooler air of the room, and that bold tongue dragged right over the clenching ring. Duo let out an embarrassing sound like a squeak/moan/whine. It felt weird. Too close. Too intimate. It felt good. Too erotic. Too little. Heero licked him once and pulled away, blowing little puffs of air across it until his skin felt chilled, until he was whining and squirming for more, because he wanted more, more of that feeling. Then Heero's tongue was back. Firm and insistent. Grinding across his entrance. Long bold strokes. It was more slippery than a finger, gliding easily over flesh. Like a cat Heero licked him, starting at his perineum and sweeping up to the base of his tailbone. It was so different, so erotic, Duo couldn't stop those whining moans. His face felt like it was on fire, and he turned it into the cool pillows both to muffle those embarrassing noises and in an effort to cool his skin. His hips lifted of their own accord off the bed, searching more contact. He was so hard it hurt. Then Heero's lips closed around the outside of his entrance, and the tip of his tongue was pressing at the center. Duo arched his back with the faintest cry when the slippery muscle wriggled into him. "Shit!" he panted. "Ahh, shit . . ." It didn't feel all that terrifically different, but the knowledge of what Heero was doing made every sensation ten times more intense. Heero's tongue was agile, and it was very clever. It slid around inside him until Duo thought me might go mad. There was no rhythm so he didn't know where to move, and he still wasn't sure if he wanted this to continue forever or stop right now because it was too much. The result was erratic movement on his part, muscles twitching spastically. He was panting harshly, so hot he almost couldn't stand it. Heero chuckled. Duo moaned, because the sound sent vibrations arcing up into his body. He could feel the sound as well as hear it. Shit. He was going crazy. Judging by his somewhat erratic movements, Heero thought Duo was having a hard time knowing what to do with himself. He could see how aroused his lover was, but Duo was so distracted by these new sensations he hadn't even tried to touch himself. It probably wouldn't take much more to send him over the edge. He sat up just long enough to grab the small bottle of lotion on the bedside table, then returned to his ministrations. While Duo squirmed and writhed, Heero applied the lotion to his first two fingers. As soon as he slipped his tongue free, he drove his fingers into Duo with one quick, firm-but not forceful-thrust. That was all it took. Duo let out a liquid cry as he came, spine arching up in a beautiful curve. His eyes squeezed shut, some tendrils of hair plastered to his flushed face and neck in graceful swirls. The rest fanned out on the pale-colored sheets, dark and vivid. Heero was mesmerized, able to see the muscles in Duo's shoulders twitching in little spasms as he rode his orgasm, expression one of utmost ecstasy that could even be mistaken for pain. It was beautiful. He kept up little pulses of his fingers, prolonging Duo's pleasure until his lover collapsed and went limp. His panting breaths slowly began to even out, the color in his face beginning to fade. Heero twisted his wrist to drag the pads of his fingers over Duo's inner walls, and he could see contented bliss creeping over Duo's face. "I like . . . feeling you there," Duo murmured. "Even if it's just your fingers. I like you being inside me." Heero bit his lower lip, fighting off arousal. He could happily spend all morning in bed, mapping every inch of Duo's body. But he had a lot to do today, and his friends were waiting to hear of his plans. He didn't want to keep them waiting any longer. Regretfully, he slid his fingers free of Duo's welcoming heat. "I like it too," Heero said, a little too much. "Come on, we should shower and get dressed and eat. The rest are waiting." Wufei was anxious. That was quite unusual, and he found he didn't care for the feeling. Even during the war, on his most dangerous missions, even in the capture of OZ, he'd never felt this low-level anxiety that curdled in his gut and made his stomach feel sour. Drumming his fingers against his thigh, he sat up straight from his graceless slouch and rose to his feet. It was almost noon. Heero had told him they'd be by almost an hour ago. The Perfect Soldier was anal about punctuality. What could be keeping them? "I'm sure they're almost here-" Quatre began, looking like he wanted to fidget. As if on cue, the door opened. Heero stepped in, and Wufei blinked. He still was not used to seeing Heero wear normal clothes. The stonewashed jeans suited him, with one well-placed tear on the upper thigh. His black tee shirt hugged his torso without clinging, showing off the build that was rapidly changing from a boy's lankiness to a man's litheness. But more importantly than his aesthetic appeal, Duo was behind him. Right way, obviously Wufei saw the difference. Duo hung back, thinner than Wufei remembered and a little paler. The shyness on his countenance was starkly out of place from the loud-mouthed American baka so caught up in making sure everyone around him was cheerful and smiling. It was disturbing. And for the first time, though he knew what Relena had done, the Chinese pilot felt a wave of poisonous hatred for the blonde girl. This was wrong. So wrong. Heero took a half step to the side, closing the door behind Duo and wrapping an arm around the boy's slim shoulders. "Duo, these are our friends. Wufei, Trowa, and Quatre." Wufei could see immediately that Duo derived a great deal of his confidence from Heero. He suspected that without the Japanese pilot at his side, Duo wouldn't be even this brave. He managed a smile that looked somewhat shaky. "Hi," he said, taking a small step closer to Heero. "Heero told me we . . . fought in the war together?" People were his business, and Quatre excelled. He immediately took the fore, perhaps sensing Wufei's (and probably Trowa's) discomfort. He smiled in a gentle way, managing to look both welcoming as if to a stranger and welcoming as if to a friend. Wufei didn't ponder too closely how that was even possible. "We've missed you," Quatre said, striding forward purposefully and yet a little slowly. Glancing briefly at Heero as if to tell him to move, he enfolded Duo in an easy hug. Wufei envied how natural Quatre made it look. Part of him wanted to do the same, to assure Duo he was in safe company. That the four gathered here were friends and allies who would not betray him. Like Relena. And how could Duo not have been put at ease by Quatre's manner? His smile now appeared more natural, and Wufei wondered if somewhere inside he still remembered his friends. He hoped so. "Good to have you back, Maxwell," Wufei said, hoping his tone sounded mellow. Judging by the slight smirk on Heero's face he failed at least a little. Even so, Duo still gave him a smile. Quatre took his hand and tucked it under his arm. "I put together some things to show you some of your past," he said, pulling Duo away from Heero and the other two. Heero didn't object, and as Quatre led Duo into another room of his house Wufei was glad of the chance to speak with the pilot of Wing alone. Trowa rose, as well, so the two of them took up on either side of Heero. "How is he?" Wufei asked. "Realistically." The look on Heero's face told him all he needed to know before Wing's pilot spoke. Only calmness radiated from his expression and his posture. He wasn't concerned. "He's doing really well," he said. Trowa stirred. "He was so . . ." "Broken?" Heero supplied in a dry voice. "I know." "It was bad, then?" Wufei inquired. It was Trowa's turn to answer with a look, and his normally blank green eyes were darkened with what Wufei suspected was a grim memory. "Very." For once Wufei wished his friend wasn't quite so . . . monosyllabic. Heero took over, and his cobalt eyes took the same look. "He was a terrified, trembling wreck," he told Wufei. Pain flooded into his eyes. "He couldn't stand to be away from me, even though I think he was afraid of me, too. At least, at first." "Shit," Wufei muttered, trying to imagine it. Heero nodded. "But . . . he got better. It was almost as if he was just tired of being afraid." "Trowa told me you lured that doctor," Wufei said, "but not what happened after that." "Duo killed him," Heero replied. "When the doctor came for him, he reacted and fought. And when I held the gun to Isenger's head, Duo stopped me and pulled the trigger himself. Since then he's . . . himself." "Has he remembered anything at all?" Wufei asked, having a hard time reconciling the two opposing images of Duo. "Some," Heero said, then admitted, "very little. But he remembered himself, which is the most important thing." "Yeah," Wufei agreed after a moment. At the moment he could think of no other questions except one. The most pressing. "A grave injustice has been done to him." "Yes," Heero agreed, and Trowa nodded. By their expressions, Heero was ready to kill and Trowa was ready to support him. Wondering if he was making a mistake, Wufei squared his shoulders and firmed his resolve. Mistake or not, it was the right thing. "Tell us what you want us to do."
tbc Chapter 12 |
