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"Room With A View"Written By: The Plotting Housewife Disclaimer: Gundam Wing belongs to Bandai, Sotsu
and associated Parties. This work is written for pleasure not profit. Rating: R Warnings: Humor, Crack. Pairings: Heero/Relena, Trowa/Quatre (implied),
Duo/Hilde (implied). Summary: Relena couldn’t quite put her finger on it, but for some reason ‘Animal Farm’ came to mind whenever the gang got together and this New Years celebration did not disappoint. It also happened to be the night she conceded that Dorothy might actually have a point for once.
"Chapter 3: Lowering the Bar " Hosting an annual New Years gala was exhausting work. It required months of planning, an ungodly amount of money, and an abundance of hollering and hand-wringing. Of course, as Vice Foreign Minister, Relena Darlian was delegated to play hostess to world leaders, religious leaders, politicians, lobbyists, corporate CEO’s, heads of charities, as well as the owners of the ESUN’s most lauded media giants. She should have known not even her blue Versace gown would be enough to keep the spotlight on herself for very long. And true to form, Dorothy Catalonia arrived to upstage her in a brazen, bedazzled dress covered in real gems. Around her shoulders was a mink stole to ward off the evening chill. The retail empress and fashion mogul click-clacked her way into the estate like she owned the place in a pair of pumps that were worth more than Relena’s entire ensemble. It was just as well. It was kind of nice having the attention directed elsewhere for a change and Dorothy thrived on it in ways Relena never did. It gave her a chance for a breather, to mingle with her actual friends who were also in attendance. She swiped a few flutes of champagne and approached the huddled and gossiping group of women that she’d known since she was fifteen, handing a glass to Une and another to Sally. Une took her drink with an appreciative nod while Sally nudged her chin towards the twinkling socialite who’d already made herself at home on the lap of a top ESUN official. “What did she do? Scour Sanq’s diamond mines to make that dress?” Relena caught the murderous glare of the man’s glowering wife who was standing nearby and hoped to God there wouldn’t be a scene. She sipped her champagne and shrugged. “You know how she is. It is a beautiful dress.” “It’s also blinding,” Hilde quipped. “It’s a good thing the sun already went down. That thing sparkles so much, it can probably be seen from space.” Relena tipped her glass at the blue-haired girl and winked. “You look lovely tonight, too, you know. It’s not very often that we get to see you all gussied up.” Hilde gestured down at her blue dress and flushed with modesty. It was darker than Relena’s, more navy than royal blue, and obviously not a top-tier designer. “This old thing? I admit it’s no Versace, but I guess it’s not bad.” “Don’t be silly,” Sally chided. “You really do look beautiful. Where did you get it?” “Howard made it, believe it or not.” A bubble of laughter escaped before Relena could stop it. “Howard? The Sweepers guy? Really?” “Yeah. He’s actually really good. He makes his own shirts, too. That’s what he does when he’s stressed. He sews. Duo takes to his punching bag when he’s out of sorts. Howard takes to his sewing machine,” Hilde informed them, dipping her lime wedge into her club soda. “Well, he’s certainly got good taste,” Une mused. She caught Sally’s sideways glance and threw her hands up in a defensive gesture. “What? It’s true. At the very least, you can’t say he’s unoriginal.” Sally shook her head with a grin. “Unoriginal he is not. And with a dress like that, I’d say he has very good taste.” “I’ll tell him you said that. He likes getting compliments. To be fair though, this was from a pattern I’d found and asked him to make. I think if I just gave him free reign, I’d be wearing a dress covered in palm trees and flamingos instead of this,” Hilde said with a laugh and then turned to Relena, poking her gently in the arm. “So, where’s your fiance?” “Oh, he’s around here somewhere. I had to give him the “don’t be rude” lecture. Last I saw him, he was still upstairs sulking.” “That boy is not a people person,” Sally agreed. “No. He’s getting better, but it’s taken some work to get him to a place where he’s finally stopped scaring people with his death glare.” She swirled her champagne around in her glass and laughed. “The second time we met, he told me he was going to kill me.” “How romantic,” Hilde droned with a roll of her eyes. “God, he was so brainwashed,” Sally said. “Poor kid.” “That’s also why he was so damned good at what he did,” Une reminded her. “Yeah, but Duo was never like that,” Hilde said. “I don’t think any of them were as brainwashed as Heero was.” “Definitely not,” Relena agreed. “They all had their primary objective and indoctrination was a part of that, but it wasn’t everything they were. The only one that comes close is Trowa. But from what I’ve seen, he acclimated into this post war world much quicker and easier than Heero has.” “I think his sister and Quatre had a lot to do with that,” Une said. “Indeed. They’ve basically been with him the entire time. Quatre is so good for him.” “You’re good for Heero, too. You two just haven’t had enough time,” Sally assured her. “It’s only been six months.” “What are you hens clucking about and why wasn’t I invited?” They turned at the familiar drawl and spotted Dorothy a few feet away, posing like a mid-twentieth century pinup. “Seriously,” she continued, stepping closer. “What’s with the funeral faces and why is there a distressing lack of the swarthy opposite sex?” Hilde rolled her eyes, less than pleased with Dorothy’s interruption. There was no love lost between the two of them. Relena didn’t blame Hilde’s resentment what with the perpetual classist jokes at her expense. “Probably because they were too busy shrouding you like flies on a dog turd.” Unshakable as ever, Dorothy flipped her hair over her shoulder and rested an expensively manicured hand on her hip. “Honestly, Schbeiker. Jealousy doesn’t suit you.” She ignored Hilde’s bristled reaction and gave her a thorough once over. “Nice dress. I didn’t realize you were inviting commoners and charity cases to this occasion, Miss Relena. Dare I say you’ve been lowering the bar with each passing year.” “You bitch,” Hilde spat and was thankfully pulled away by Sally before the situation could escalate. Dorothy narrowed her eyes at the ranting woman and waved her fingers like a Hollywood starlet on the red carpet. “So nice talking to you,” she sing-songed, then dropped her voice just low enough for Relena to hear. “Trailer trash.” Relena swatted her hand down and leaned forward with a hiss. “Stop it,” she warned. “I didn’t invite you here to instigate fights.” “No, you invited me because I’m a generous donor of your soon-to-be-husband’s project.” Her blue eyes twinkled above the rim of her champagne glass. “In our world, Miss Relena, money talks. You know that as well as I do.” Relena clenched her jaw in irritation. “That does not mean you can come into my house and mistreat my guess, Ms Catalonia.” “How formal,” Dorothy drawled, lazily blinking eyes that were lined with tiny gems. “Speaking of which, where is Master Yuy and the other four social rejects you’re so fond of?” Relena opened her mouth to deliver a scathing retort, but was stopped when a loud whoop echoed off the walls, effectively silencing the white noise of murmured conversations among the guests. A moment later, she watched in horror as Duo Maxwell streaked right down the center of the ballroom, naked as a jaybird but for his cherished baseball cap and what looked like a kazoo sticking out of his mouth. If her jaw hadn’t already been on the floor, it certainly was when Chang Wufei came barreling through in Duo’s wake, waving his katana in the air and shouting Chinese obscenities. His pristine, traditional formal wear was stained in hot pink and covered with sequins. Not a minute later, Sally, Hilde, and the remaining three Gundam pilots tore through the room, shouting after the two men. As they disappeared into the courtyard, Quatre skidded to a stop and glanced around, suddenly aware of the spectacle that had just occurred as well as their riveted audience. He reached back and scratched the back of his head, his charming public persona instantly appearing with the toothy, dimpled grin that never failed to get him his way. “Sorry, folks,” he chirped. “This is simply a rehearsal for the action-packed evening our lovely hostess has prepared for us.” He met Relena’s shocked gaze and gave her a saucy wink that somehow communicated so much more. It was a wink that said, I hope you have a good imagination, Miss Relena because I don’t know how else we’re going to salvage this. She glared murderously at the blond man, sending her own silent message. You can start with disposing of Maxwell and Chang and you’d better do a good job of hiding the bodies, or else I’m blaming you. He nodded in acknowledgement and turned his thousand watt smile on the rest of the guests. “Right. As you were,” he announced with a flick of his hand and then he was off, disappearing into the courtyard with the others. Dorothy watched all of this with silent amusement and then turned back to Relena who immediately put a hand up and barked, “Not a word, Dorothy.” She grabbed the silver tray of a passing maître d’ and chugged down an entire flute of champagne, tossing the glass over her shoulder where it shattered on the marble floor before she reached for a second. “And you thought I was exaggerating when I said you were lowering the bar.” Dorothy’s smug voice reached her ringing ears, but her only objective now was to get so sloshed, she wouldn’t remember anything come morning. She ignored the woman in favor of swiping a fourth flute of champagne from her confiscated tray and knocked back half of it in one gulp. She made a face at the rest and dropped the tray onto the floor with a resounding clang. "Someone get me a scotch and soda, for Christ’s sake.”
~ * ~ Chapter 4 |
