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"Paranormal"Written By: The Plotting Housewife Disclaimer: Gundam Wing belongs to Bandai, Sotsu
and associated Parties. This work is written for pleasure not profit. Rating: R Warnings: Humor, crack, ghost hunters, AU Pairings: 1x2, 3x4, 5x6, 13xUne, RxD Summary: The gang gets together to investigate
a haunted house. The ghosts are ready to scare them silly. Too bad
they don't know who they're dealing with. "Paranormal " Treize spent the next few hours lounging on the couch of the living room, lamenting the fact that he was stuck inside the house with his wife, his ex, and a whole team of ghost hunting grunts. He nursed his nose which had turned a nauseating shade of purple that spread up around his eyes and he cursed Trowa to kingdom come. "Serves you right," Une snapped as she sat nearby in a rocking chair. The creak of the joists making his head feel like a concrete slab that had seen too much foot traffic. Ugh. This was torture. He placed a cool wet cloth across his eyes and tried to ignore his wife who seemed hell-bent on annoying him to death. Still, it was better than that Winner kid. That boy was several cards shy of a full deck. His freaky ability to know what Treize was thinking gave him a serious case of the willies. And what had he said? His family was happy to see him again? Treize had been a little distracted by the pesky fact of finding out he was inside the House of Horrors to pay much attention to the little blond flake who grinned at him like he was a free pancake breakfast at the local church. But...is that who was haunting this place? It made sense considering it had been in the family for centuries. His great, great grandfather Treize the First had built it and there were many generations who'd occupied the house over the years. "Quatre says it's your family whose haunting this place," said Une. Treize lifted his head up, the cloth slipping down his face as he glared at his wife with one bruised eye. "Who's Quatre?" Une dipped her chin, looking at him like he was slower than molasses. "Winner, dear. The little blond kid that brought you the ice." "Ah." He dropped his head back down on the arm of the couch and pulled the cloth back up over his eyes. "The weirdo." "Don't talk about him like that. He's a sweet kid." "He's also weird." "Speak for yourself," Une muttered. "What was that?" "Nothing." As if it was bad enough that he was now stuck here with a bruised and painful face, Zechs and that Maxwell kid had to start laughing every time they looked at him. Not to mention being on the receiving end of Chang's resentful glares. It wasn't his fault. He'd simply asked Zechs to come back to him. Okay, maybe he crossed the line when he said he'd have the two of them fired if he didn't. Treize wasn't exactly accustomed to being told "no". As someone whom people often bent over backwards for, he'd been appalled with Zechs had told him to go fuck himself. But, did he really have to tell Une? To say she was pissed was the understatement of the year. She'd literally ripped him a new asshole, then shoved him out into the cold, snowy night with a pillow and blanket, and locked the door behind her. Furious, he went around to the back and kicked the door in. Unfortunately, he'd been met with the muzzle of a shotgun pressing against his nose the moment he stepped inside. Treize had sneered at her. "You don't have the guts." Une's lip curled and the ominous sound of the safety being clicked off echoed throughout the kitchen like a death knell. "Try me." Treize slunk back outside with his tail between his legs and spent the next few nights in the car. Even after that, he was still in the doghouse, but he'd at least been allowed to go inside and feed himself. The living room silent for a while. Only the creak of the rocking chair breaking through the thick blanket of quiet and the peace of Treize's fantasies about murdering the whole group and leaving their souls trapped to haunt the same house along with his family. Creak...creak...creak... Treize clenched his teeth in aggravation, his blood pressure reaching boiled lobster levels. Creak...creak...*moan*... Treize raised an eyebrow under his cloth. "The hell are you doing over there?" "It wasn't me, you dumb shit." Treize's veins turned to ice and he sat up quickly which was a ludicrous idea. "Ow..." "Quiet," Une hissed. They listened to the silence when another moan traveled through the air, seeming to pass right over Treize's head. He swore he could feel his luxurious locks of hair turn stark white. He barked at Une. "What are you waiting for? Go get the experts." Une shot up out the chair, swung the door open and ran down the hall. Treize suddenly realized he was now left alone in the room with a ghost. Too terrified to move, he sat, frozen, clutching the cloth in his hand, knuckles turning white. *Ooooooooh...* "Who's there?" *Treeeeiiiiizzzzeeee...* It was a distinctly female voice and it rang familiar in his mind. He quirked an eyebrow. "...Auntie Millie?" The group had gathered around the doorway like a pile of lookie-lou's to catch a glimpse of Treize shitting his designer slacks and he all but threatened to fire them. He allowed Dorothy inside, only because she had kick ass eyebrows like he did. She entered the room with a box-like device slung over her shoulder with a long strap, a long microphone in her hands, and headphones on her ears. He watched her slowly walk around the room with the microphone, stopping every so often, looking deep in concentration. Of course, these things take time, but then Treize wasn't exactly patient. "Well?" She held up her hand to quiet him. "Don't shoosh me, young lady." Dorothy shot him a look that made him blush like an adolescent school girl. Okay, I probably shouldn't piss this one off. He asked again, nicer this time. "You got anything?" "They're arguing." "Who is?" "Is the name Mildred familiar to you?" Treize slapped his hand down on his thigh. "I knew it! I thought that was her voice. What's she saying? Who else is here?" "...Someone named Cyrus?" "Great pappy, Cryus? Huh. How 'bout that. Who else?" She pulled the headphones off. "I don't know. They shut up." "Why?" "Probably because they figured out I can hear them. I got it recorded, though." Duo stuck his head through the doorway, glancing at Treize and snickering. "We should do an EVP session. Quat? Relena? You do the honors? I'm going to go to the van and check with Heero and Tro to see if the cameras picked up anything." Winner and Peacecraft came in then, the girl carried a small audio recorder in her hand, and the two sat down on the opposite couch and began to ask questions. "Who are you?" "Why are you here?" "Can you give us a sign?" Treize snorted. "I think we're well past that." "Ssh." He huffed watching as Peacecraft asked the questions while Winner sat silent, eyes closed. The backs of his hands rested lightly on his knees, the fingers turned up and thumb and forefinger touching to form a "O". His lips moved rapidly, whispering something Treize couldn't hear. "Why haven't you left?" "Why are you bothering the people who come here?" "Do you know you scare them?" Treize threw up his hands. "For Christ's sake, they're not five years old!" Peacecraft leveled him with a glare. "Well, do you have anything you'd like to ask? They're your family." He thought about it, drumming his fingers on his thigh, smirk curling one side up his mouth up. "Yeah. When is the Mothership coming back for Winner?" "Owww...." Treize groaned as Peacecraft pressed an ice pack on his black eye. That son of a bitch, Barton, had hit him again. Une sat nearby in her rocker looking at him like he was the biggest fucking idiot she'd ever known. Considering he felt like the biggest fucking idiot he'd ever known, he didn't blame her. She shook her head at him. "When are you going to learn?" He shot her a glare from his one good eye and refused to answer. She got up and walked towards the door, glancing at him over her shoulder. "You might want to keep your mouth shut from now on if you don't want your face to resemble ground beef." He grumbled under his breath about hot-headed peons and frigid bitches. "What was that?" He almost repeated it, but thought better of it. He still had all his teeth. He wanted to keep it that way. "Nothing." "That's what I thought." He gazed up at Peacecraft as she let go of the ice pack and stepped away. "Do you approve of this?" Peacecraft's lips curled up. "Absolutely." He sulked. "I'll bet your brother is enjoying this." "Considering what you did to him, are you surprised?" "I just missed him. I wanted him to come back to me. Oh, why am I telling you this?" "Maybe because I'm the only one dumb enough to listen to you." He glared at her back as she turned to leave the room. He dropped his head on the arm of the sofa with a thump that made his face hurt. He rested one ice pack against his nose, another one over his eye. "This sucks."
~ * ~ Chapter 7 |
