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"Time for Me"Written By: Gypsie 1201
Warnings: Angst, Domestic/Emotional Abuse (hints),
Language, Post EW, POV Rating: R Disclaimer: I don't own Gundam Wing or any of
its characters, nor will I make any money from the creation of this
story. Feedback: All is welcome and much appreciated. Summary: Some times, walking away is the only option you have. A/N: Inspired by the song “If You’re Gonna Leave” by Emerson Hart.
"Time for Me " It’s late when the door finally opens and I hear him stumble into our apartment, more than likely reeking of alcohol and that sickly, sweet cologne he doesn’t think I recognize. This is the story of my life for the last few weeks, but in truth, I’d seen this coming for quite some time now. We’d been good together when we started out a little over a year ago. After dancing around each other for nearly two years, the passion and enthusiasm we had for each other had kept us very busy for the first few months and no matter how bad things have gotten since then, I’ll never regret the time we had together. But like I said, I’d seen this coming; I’d just chose to ignore it until it landed squarely in my face. Or on my jaw as the reality of it happened. After dealing with him either ignoring me or criticizing me all day long at Preventer’s headquarters then disappearing as soon as our shift was over for his little rendezvous so many nights in a row, I’d finally had enough and confronted him about it last night. It was probably a stupid move doing it while he was still drunk off his ass, but I was just so tired of the whole thing; the lies, the pitying looks I was getting at work, and, most importantly, the feelings of betrayal and inadequacy his actions were causing inside me. So I’d waited until he came stumbling in late last night and cornered him, demanding to know what was going on. When he’d tried to brush me off, complaining about being tired, I hadn’t backed down. I was determined to get an answer out of him that would make sense of everything that was going on between us. And some small part of me was still hoping we could work it out if he would just tell me what was wrong. That small spark of hope died real quick though when his fist came out of no where and I found myself flat out on the floor, holding my jaw, and watching him head for our bedroom for the night. I’d actually laid there for several hours after he’d gone, too shocked to even pick myself up off the floor. But when I did, I also made a decision and it was with a feeling of confused relief that I’d pulled an extra blanket and pillow from the hallway closet to make my bed on the couch. It was a decision that was only strengthened this morning when he’d actually had the nerve to accuse me of getting into a bar fight the night before because of the huge assed bruise that covered the left side of my face. But whereas before I would’ve gotten angry or felt insulted by what he’d said, I merely shook my head in pity and left for work a few minutes early. Too bad Heero didn’t take it so well. He’d taken one look at my face and I’d thought for sure he was ready and prepared to kill. I’d had to do quite a bit of fast talking to calm him down enough so that we could work on the case we’d been assigned. But I’d seen the worry in his eyes every time he’d looked at me today. Worry and something else that was entirely more than a best friend was supposed to show. That’s another story for another time though because even as those tangled feeling drift across my mind, the sound of a solid body colliding with the floor, followed by a muffled grunt, reach my ears and with a sigh, I stand from where I’d been sitting on the couch and head for the light switch on the wall. “What the fuck!” he exclaims just as I flip the switch, bathing the room in white light and causing him to curse again as his hand comes up to shield his eyes. The fact that he’s not slurring his words, as he normally does when he’s three sheets to the wind, gives me some satisfaction. He’s more likely to remember what’s about to happen if he’s at least partly sober. “Duo, what the hell is all this shit doing in the middle of the floor?” he demands as his eyes adjust enough to take in the boxes I’d left stacked around the front door. There are only three of them in total, each one small and light. Easy enough for him to pack them out on his own. “It’s your stuff.” I tell him from across the room. My little adventure from the night before made me leery of getting too close to him, even if I was pretty sure I could handle him if he tried to hit me again. I’d just not been prepared for it last night. “My stuff?” he asks. “What do you mean?” “It’s your stuff, Wufei. Or at least what’s left of it.” I say with a sigh and while I’d have liked nothing more than to have taken out some of my anger and frustrations on the things that I knew he treasured, I simply hadn’t been able to bring myself to do it. With a wave of my hand, I tell him, “That envelope on top there is the address and key to the storage shed with the rest of it. I prepaid for the first month’s rent. After that I don’t care what happens to it.” For the longest time, he simply sits there on the floor and blinks at me as his alcohol soaked brain absorbs the words I’d said, and the one’s I hadn’t. Finally though, I see the realization dawn in his dark eyes even as his face seems to crumble in on itself. “Duo--“ “Save it, ‘Fei, I’m just doing what you’ve been too much of a coward to do.” I cut him off sharply, not wanting to hear any more excuses or lies. The flinch he gives me at my words is pretty satisfying I must admit, but it’s the fact that he does nothing to contradict me that really makes me feel good. If it’s one thing Chang Wufei hates, it’s being called a coward. This time though, he knows it’s the truth. “Just take your stuff and go.” I tell him with a deep sigh as I turn toward the bedroom with every intention of making up for the restless night on the couch I’d had the night before. I had to be at work early in the morning and if I didn’t want Heero hovering over me again because of the dark circles under my eyes, I needed my sleep. Just as I’m reaching the hallway though, his voice sounding very tired reaches my ears. “Can we still be friend?” “Maybe.” I tell him without turning back, my own voice sounding just a little bit tired as well. “Maybe someday we can try to be friends again.” I hear him sigh as the full realization settles into his mind before he picks himself up off the floor. Then, as the first of the boxes scrap across the floor, indicating he’s conceding the fight, I start back down the hallway toward the bedroom door. “Don’t forget to leave your key.” I call back to him before stepping through the doorway and closing it behind me. And while it’s more symbolic than anything else, the feel of the heavy wood against my back is more reassuring than anything else that has happened today. Even while I’d been packing his stuff and calling the movers, it hadn’t seemed real. Not even telling him just a few minutes ago had brought that feeling. But with the door closed behind me, separating my old life with Wufei from my new life without him, it finally feels real. And surprisingly enough, I can’t help but smile. I might not know what my life has in store for me in the future, but right now, I can’t wait to find out. END
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