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"Sideshow"Written By: Clara Barton Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. The following
is an intellectual exercise with no intention of profit. That said,
these characterizations, words, and situations are mine. Please ask
before reprinting. Rating: NC 17 Warnings: language, sex, violence, BDSM, angst Pairings: 2x3 Summary: Duo visited Trowa a few
times every year, catching up to the circus on one colony or another
and showing up uninvited and unannounced in Trowa's trailer. But an
unexpected confession from Duo leads to a change in the nature of
their relationship. "Sideshow" Chapter Five It took every ounce of Trowa's not insignificant self control to not drop his jacket, cross the distance from the entrance of his trailer to where Duo knelt, and pull him against him. As it was, he had to pause, had to breath deeply and force himself to go through the routine of hanging up his jacket, of securing his gun and sitting down to take off his boots while Duo looked at him with those dark blue eyes that saw everything and Trowa felt a little raw, felt too much relief at Duo's presence and he needed too much to touch him, to feel his hair and his skin and his mouth and so he sat down on the couch, as far away as he could get, and he fought to get control over himself. There were new scars, a just healed gunshot wound on Duo's right shoulder that was shiny and pink and Trowa knew Duo would offer no explanation, and before - before this thing between them began, before the riots, Trowa wouldn't have given it more than idle thought, because Duo could take care of himself, had survived damn near any kind of death trap imaginable. But that had been before. "I would have come sooner," Duo spoke up, his voice soft, unsure of how welcome his words would be. Trowa arched an eyebrow. Duo shrugged, the gesture sensuous with his hands folded behind his head, and Trowa wondered how long he had been like this, because surely his shoulder was sore. "Didn't think you'd be too thrilled to see a boot print over my kidneys and I can't say I was too eager for a beating when I was still covered in bruises." Trowa swallowed down his first three responses to that. "There are other ways to discipline you, if you aren't in the condition to be bent over my knee," Trowa finally murmured. "Come to me when you can, Duo. I'd rather see you covered in bruises than not see you at all." Duo held his gaze for a long moment, and Trowa knew he had given too much away, but it was too late now, the words out there, and Duo nodded, accepting it. Accepting him. Trowa still felt a little shaky, his tongue too large in his own mouth and his heartbeat too loud but he rested one hand on his right knee and Duo came to him, crawled into his lap and put his hands on Trowa's shoulders and Trowa pulled his head down and kissed him, worshipped Duo's mouth and caressed his tongue until Duo was hard, until he was moaning and his heartbeat drummed against Trowa's chest. Trowa pulled back, looked at Duo's swollen lips, his flushed face and his closed eyes and he felt his heart constrict painfully. Karma's a bitch. He'd found himself thinking that too often recently. Here he was, desperately in love with a man he could not keep, could not hope to have by his side. It served him right, he knew, for all the things he had done. It served him right and this would only, could only, end badly. But it hadn't ended yet. He ran his thumb over Duo's lips, parting them and Duo licked at his thumb, opened his lips and sucked on it and Trowa hummed in approval. Duo opened his eyes and looked at him, his dark gaze filled with lust and something more, something that made Trowa feel immense and insignificant at the same time. Trowa ran his other hand through Duo's bangs, smirking when Duo nipped at his thumb and Duo smiled around the digit, his wide lips still wet and bright and Trowa pulled his thumb away and kissed him again. "Stand up," he said after he felt Duo start to shift in his lap impatiently, eager for friction and release. Duo did as ordered, standing up and his hands went to the back of his head again and Trowa stood as well. He walked around Duo's body, looked him over for anything he might have missed, any tattoos or other wounds, and he spotted the clown mask at the small of Duo's back. The half mask with the four pointed star for an eye and the wide mouth. It took a solid minute for his brain to process it, to identify it as his mask, the one Duo had seen him wear countless times. He reached out, traced over it and felt Duo shiver. "I said you didn't need to change your body for me," Trowa reminded him. "I know," Duo said, his voice soft and uncertain again. "But I needed to do it." Trowa swallowed hard, and he wondered if the other tattoos were the same for Duo, if they were a need. "All of your injuries are healed?" He asked. He hadn't seen anything aside from the gunshot wound, and obviously that was healed enough for Duo to work through whatever residual pain and soreness he felt. "Yeah," Duo said and his voice betrayed his anticipation, his understanding that Trowa wasn't asking out of idle curiosity. Trowa left him standing there and went into his bedroom, pulled out the slim metal case that held his tools, the things he used on his pets and he opened it and removed the riding crop and the blindfold before putting the case back under the bed. Duo was still standing, still obediently waiting for him. "Move your hands lower," Trowa instructed. "To the nape of your neck." Duo complied and Trowa put the crop between his teeth and tied the blindfold around Duo's head. His breath caught and Trowa heard him try to steady himself, draw in several deep breaths. Trowa held the crop loosely in his left hand and used his right to touch Duo, to run his fingers over his spine in a soothing line. "Red or yellow?" "Neither," Duo breathed, but he didn't sound so sure - certainly didn't sound on the verge of shouting green again, and Trowa had anticipated this. Maybe Shandor would have gone ahead and bound Duo's hands as well, but as much as Trowa respected Shandor, the partnership Trowa and Duo had was... unique in a lot of ways. It wasn't just that the two of them were dark and damaged, it wasn't just that they had suffered abuse for years, it wasn't just that they had killed, had lost everything and everyone. They had been through hell and back again but only barely, only just managing to stay sane and Trowa knew Duo needed this, knew that Duo could find release, could find peace and and he could belong if Trowa did this right. But if Trowa did it wrong... "Do you still trust me?" "Yes," Duo said, his voice catching. "Yes," he repeated, his voice stronger this time. Easier said than done, Trowa knew, and when he lashed out with the crop and caught the meaty part of Duo's flank he wasn't surprised when Duo took a step forward, when he almost lost his balance and he cried out in shock. Trowa let him compose himself. "Spread your legs wider," Trowa instructed and Duo shifted, balanced himself better and Trowa hit him again, letting the rigid tip catch his chest and Duo bit his lip and he groaned. He alternated between the tip and the slim rod, alternating between keeping his wrist rigid as he delivered the blows or letting it flex and he knew it had to hurt, the stinging, the burn and Duo cried out, rocked forwards and backwards but he didn't move again, didn't lose his balance. After ten blows Trowa paused, swung the crop as though to deliver another blow, but as it touched Duo's skin he gentled the touch, let it whisper across his ass and Duo whimpered. "You are doing so very well," Trowa told him. "Thank you," Duo said, his voice shaky, and Trowa could hear the thickness of tears, knew that Duo was only barely holding himself together and maybe he should allow him that, but Trowa needed to see Duo's face wet and red and his eyes bright and wild again. He delivered another harsh blow and Duo cried out, his hands fisting at the nape of his neck, clawing at his own hair. Trowa used his right index finger to trace over one of the welts left by the crop and Duo shuddered, leaned into the touch. "Your body is so beautiful," Trowa murmured. "So perfect for my discipline." He struck again and Duo cried out again, his voice a little hoarse, and Trowa knew that alternating the softer touches of his hand and the crop was making it worse, was breaking Duo's focus and self-control and that was what Trowa wanted, what he needed from him. He hit him again, the tip of the crop catching the fleshy part of his right thing and then he edged it along to Duo's cock, pressed his erection and spread the glistening bead of precum down the shaft. Duo moaned and then finally sobbed, finally cried as Trowa wanted him to when he struck his cock, when the tip of the crop slapped against the rigid flesh and Duo's teeth were gritted against the pain but Trowa heard him sob all the same, saw the way Duo struggled to breath. But his erection did not diminish, even after Trowa hit it again, even after he saw the tracks of tears leak through the blindfold and the muscles in Duo's arms jump. "So very perfect," Trowa said again, pressing his lips against Duo's ear and Duo shivered, tried to lean against him and Trowa hit him again, the blow making Duo's cock bob up and down and his knees shook. "If only you could see your own cock, Duo, if only you could see how eager it is for my touch, how eager it is for another blow." Duo gasped, moaned when Trowa hit hit again, this time on his left thigh, close to his cock, close enough for Duo to jump. Trowa stepped back, away from Duo's body and he left him swaying, reeling from the sensations and he watched Duo try to steady himself, try to regain his breath and prepare for another onslaught. Trowa kept him waiting, watched the glistening tear tracks dry on Duo's cheeks and his heaving chest rise and fall. He stepped closer again, flicked the crop close to Duo's body, letting the air rush against his skin but not touching him. Duo rocked again, anticipating the blows but confused when none came. "Beg me," Trowa instructed. "Beg for my touch Duo. If you want your discipline to continue, you must beg for it." Duo seemed to fight the idea, to resist having to beg for pain instead of just sexual release, but Trowa stood back and waited. "Please," Duo finally said, his voice rough. "Please discipline me." Trowa hit him again, three quick blows across his ass and Duo cried out after each one, sobbed again and it was different this time, it was truly Duo letting go, truly submitting and Trowa's blood sang, hearing the change in Duo's cries, feeling the resistance in his body sink away. After the third blow he set the crop down on the kitchen table, letting it thud and Duo jumped at the noise. Trowa ghosted his fingertips over Duo's sides, from his armpits to his hips and Duo whimpered again. Trowa knelt in front of him and blew hot air on Duo's cock. Duo gasped, clearly not expecting it, and Trowa licked him, laved the sensitive, abused flesh and Duo mumbled something incoherent. Trowa opened his mouth wide and bobbed down the length of Duo's cock, drawing him deep into his mouth and throat and Duo groaned, a low, primal sound of pleasure that electrified Trowa. "I like that," Duo breathed. "God Trowa, I like that so much." This was probably another thing Shandor wouldn't approve of. Not Trowa kneeling in front of Duo, not Trowa using his mouth on Duo's cock, but Trowa didn't see how this position lessened his control of Duo at all. It tested him, to be sure. He could feel Duo's muscles shuddering under his grip, as Duo held himself in check and didn't thrust forward, and Trowa knew it was difficult, oh so difficult not to actively seek pleasure after the sharp pain of a flogging. But Duo held still, let Trowa caress him and suck him and drag his teeth against the sensitive underside. "Please," Duo's voice was barely above a whisper. "Please, Trowa, can I come for you?" Trowa pulled back, replaced his mouth with his hand and looked up at Duo's face, at his bottom lip once again pinched between his teeth as he tried to control himself. "Yes, Duo. You can come for me." Trowa felt Duo's hips jerk and he moved forward again, catching the head of Duo's cock in his mouth and Duo swore and he emptied himself in Trowa's mouth. Trowa swallowed him, sucked at the head of Duo's cock until he was empty and shuddering and then he released him. Trowa sat back on his heels so he could look at Duo more, could see just how utterly devastated he was, how completely undone. He was gorgeous, beautiful in a way that took Trowa's breath away and made his heart hurt. Trowa stared at him for a few minutes, until Duo's breathing was normal again, and then he rose to his feet and went into the bathroom to get the aloe. He came back out and tugged the blindfold free. In the future, he would leave it on for this as well, because the anticipation of relief was almost as powerful as the anticipation of pain, but Duo had endured enough already. Duo blinked against the light, and his eyes were still bright and wet and half-wild and Trowa had to kiss him, had to see Duo's eyes widen and then flutter closed. "Put your arms down," Trowa instructed when he stepped back, and Duo obeyed with a slight from. Trowa ran his fingers over the shiny wound and Duo nodded. "Thank you." "Tell me, if it hurts too much," Trowa told him, because as much as Trowa wanted, needed Duo to feel pain, he wanted it to be pain of his own doing. Duo nodded again, but it was clear that he wouldn't say anything, was too stubborn and it was going to be a problem, some day soon Trowa knew, but for tonight he let it go. Trowa spread the aloe over the welts on Duo's skin, his torso, his thighs, his ass and his cock and by the time he was done Duo was hard and whimpering again. "You were very good tonight," Trowa told him. "You pleased me." Duo arched an eyebrow at that and Trowa smirked. "Would you like a reward?" "Yes," Duo said immediately. "Shall I brush your hair again or would you like to request something else?" Trowa tugged on Duo's cock a little, offering him the chance to get off again. Duo closed his eyes, swayed a little. "Could I get you off?" It was Trowa's turn to arch an eyebrow when Duo opened his eyes, when he blushed under Trowa's stare. "You wouldn't like something else instead?" Duo shook his head. "Not tonight. I want to make you come. I want to taste you again." Trowa swallowed hard. "Please?" Duo added. "Very well," Trowa conceded, gave in because this was Duo's reward and if that was really what he wanted... Trowa saw no reason to deny either one of them. Duo knelt down in front of him and set about efficiently undoing Trowa's belt and trousers, pulling them down with his boxers and Trowa didn't bother to step out of them, especially not when Duo immediately leaned forward to taste him, his tongue darting out to lick the head, the shaft, his balls. Trowa threaded the fingers of his right hand through Duo's hair, encouraging him and he explored, as he eased his mouth over Trowa's cock and tried to work his length deep into his mouth and throat. Duo choked and Trowa used his hold to tug his head back. "You don't have to go so deep," he told him. "Only take in as much as you're comfortable with." Duo nodded once and he tried again, not taking Trowa in quite as deep this time. "Very good. That feels wonderful," Trowa told him. Duo hummed in gratitude and Trowa moaned. "Oh yes, do that again." Duo hummed again and Trowa gave an appreciated tug on his bangs. "Very good, Duo." Duo worked at Trowa's cock with the same deliberate attention he gave any problem, any machine, any task and it felt divine to have Duo's entire focus on him, on his cock and his pleasure. "Would you like me to come in your mouth?" Trowa asked as he neared orgasm. Duo nodded his head, arched his neck so he could look up at Trowa with wide, eager eyes. "Make sure you swallow every drop," Trowa said and Duo nodded again. Trowa came with a low moan, Duo's name on his lips and Duo's mouth on his cock, sucking and swallowing him down. He eased back after a moment, after he came down from that blissful release. Duo looked up at him and Trowa smirked. "That was very good, Duo." "Thank you," Duo said and he grinned, his normal lopsided expression but it was genuine, as it so rarely was. Trowa pulled his boxers and pants back up and fastened them before sitting down on the couch. He motioned for Duo to join him, to climb back onto his lap again and Duo did so, resting his head on Trowa's shoulder when Trowa pulled him close. "I missed you," Trowa admitted, though he doubted he needed to say it aloud for Duo to know. Still, the words themselves meant something, the admission. "I came back," Duo reminded him. Trowa traced over the gunshot wound. "You brought a little less of you this time," he pointed out. "I brought all that I could," Duo returned, his voice quiet and solemn and Trowa knew he should drop it, knew this line of conversation would lead nowhere good. "There's going to be another war." "There was always going to be another war," Duo sighed and he burrowed deeper, pressed his face against Trowa's heart and Trowa knew that it was Duo asking him to stop, to let it go. "We didn't die in the last one," Duo said, speaking up before Trowa could. "We didn't die then." Which didn't mean they wouldn't die this time, that they wouldn't die now. -o- Trowa wasn't the only one relieved to see Duo. Even if none of the troupe suspected Duo was involved in something dangerous that took away chunks of his flesh, they knew what was happening on the other colonies and they knew that Duo traveled to places that weren't safe. Sylvan spent the entire day following him around. She spotted him in the morning, fixing one of the mechanical racing games, and went rushing back to her trailer to change into her white dress and Trowa had decided to spend most of his day following Duo too and he saw Duo's face when Sylvan approached him in her dress, saw his look of confusion and then his slow grin when he told her she looked like someone he'd read about in a book once and Sylvan's face went red and she grinned back. It was adorable, misguided, but harmless enough and Duo spent the rest of the day calling her princess, which seemed to delight her and irritate her in equal measure. Duo ate the evening meal with Trowa, Cathy and Besnik and Trowa allowed Cathy to get in a few jibes, to say that hopefully now Trowa would relax and stop being such a pain in everyone's ass, to say that it was only when Duo was around that he remembered to act like a human. Duo arched an eyebrow at that, at the scowl on Trowa's face because it was one thing for him to admit to Duo that he missed him, entirely another for Cathy to make him out to be a lovesick fool. After the show, Trowa did his usual patrol of the circus grounds and tried to decide what he would do to Duo tonight. He'd seen the welts on his skin that morning, in bed when Duo woke up and it had given Trowa a dark, possessive delight to see the marks. But he didn't want to overdo things, so perhaps it was time to teach Duo denial, to refuse him release. Trowa walked back towards his trailer thinking of just how much Duo was likely to reject that kind of discipline and he thought this would probably be the night when he finally had to punish him - but Trowa's thoughts were put on hold when he saw a cluster of lights by Simza's trailer. Frowning, he walked over and as he neared he could see several members of the troupe - Nicholae, Pesha, Besnik, Nadya and August - standing outside of the open door to the trailer. "What's going on?" He asked. August sighed heavily. "Sylvan. She was attacked." "When? Who?" Trowa felt the chill of rage settle into his belly, quickly followed by unease. Had this just happened? As he was patrolling? "During the show," August said. "She was cleaning up the food cart and - " "And some idiots tried to rape her." Duo stood just inside the trailer, and his face was illuminated enough for Trowa to see his anger, his disgust - and his bloody nose. "You stopped them." Duo nodded and Trowa let out a relieved breath. "Where are they now?" Duo sneered. "Gone. I should have stopped them but I was more worried about Sylvan." He jerked his head, indicating the trailer. "We should give them some space." Duo stepped down and closed the door behind himself. "Pesha, you and Nicholae check the trailers. Make sure everyone is safe tonight." Nicholae looked furious, but the task would at least let him find a use for his anger and Trowa was impressed that August recognized that. "Everyone else," August continued, "try to -" He trailed off as a wash of light illuminated all of them. Trowa turned, shielding his eyes with his hand. Colonial MPs. "There was an attack on this premises tonight," one of the MPs said, stepping forward. He was young, maybe Trowa's age, and he had the tall, wide build of a Terran. "Yeah," Duo said. "A girl was almost raped. She -" "I'm talking about the attack on the governor's son. Someone nearly beat him to death." Duo sneered and Trowa felt his stomach sink. "If the governor's son is the worthless prink who tried to rape a thirteen year old then it's a shame he wasn't beaten to death." "Was it you?" The MP asked, shining his flashlight on Duo's face, on the blood trickling from his nose and the bruise forming around his right eye. Trowa and Besnik stepped forward, in front of Duo. The MPs laughed. "Yeah, it's him. Look at this scum trying to protect him." The lead MP made a gesture with his hands and three of the others stepped forward. Trowa and Besnik pushed them back. "Don't," Duo warned. "'S not worth you two getting caught up in this shit." His voice was low and serious. He shouldered his way between them and stepped forward, held his hands up and, turning his head a little to smirk at Trowa, folded them behind his head. "Yeah. It was me." ~ * ~ |
