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"Going the Distance"Written By: Clara Barton Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. The following
is an intellectual exercise with no intention of profit. That said,
these characterizations, words, and situations are mine. Please ask
before reprinting. Rating: NC 17 Warnings: Angst, language, violence, sex, AU Pairings: 1x2x3 Summary: Duo Maxwell has just signed on to join Team Gundam Wing, an upstart League of Legends team looking to win the World Championships. Duo Maxwell, the first openly gay professional gamer. Duo Maxwell, the guy hated by almost all of Reddit. Duo Maxwell, the guy whose own brother hates him. Duo Maxwell, the guy who really just wants to find a team that doesn't hate him. A/N: This fic is an AU that has the boys playing
professional League of Legends. I'm going to try my best to not get
bogged down too much in game terminology or things like that, but,
well, I WILL reference the game and try to explain as much as I can,
as I go. I'm also way too lazy to make up "new" teams for
the league, so I will be using existing teams and players, with the
exceptions of Team Gundam Wing, Zodiac Gaming, and the Valkyries.
So… I will be referencing real people and real teams. "Going the Distance"
Chapter Twenty-Seven By the time the final weekend of the season rolled around a week later, Duo felt human again. He was still having trouble sleeping well, still wasn't the biggest fan of eating much, but he at least wasn't dead on his feet by nine at night. He was at least able to return to a normal-ish schedule. Normal-ish because normal would have been staying up until two or three in the morning, sitting beside Trowa and wrecking Solo Queue together. It would have meant going upstairs and stopping by his own room only long enough to change into pajamas and then furtively sneaking down the hall and into their room. It would have been crawling between them and curling around Heero. It would have meant Trowa's tongue and hands teasing him while Heero knelt at his feet and sucked him off. It would have meant Trowa fucking him while he fucked Heero. It would have meant waking up in a tangle of limbs, too hot and a little sore and definitely a little sleep-deprived. It would have meant grumbling with Trowa while they lagged behind Heero on their run, watching his ass and both no doubt thinking of things they would rather be doing to that ass instead of running behind it. But, because it was just normal-ish, Duo stayed up until two on his own - either Trowa went to bed earlier, with Heero, or he stayed up and played on his own. Duo went to bed alone, in his own room, and spent hours tossing and turning every night - morning, really - before finally falling asleep. He didn't go on morning runs with them, either, and even though Duo sat beside Trowa every day at practice, even though Heero was just two seats away, Duo felt completely isolated from them. He also wasn't the only one to notice. On Saturday morning, as Duo finished brushing his teeth in the bathroom he shared with Meilin, she banged on the bathroom door until he let her in. "We need to talk." "In here?" Duo asked around a mouthful of toothpaste. Meilin shrugged. "Why not?" In the face of her complete lack of concern for the fact that Duo was standing in just his boxers, he felt silly. "Okay..." Duo leaned over the sink and spit out the toothpaste. "What did you want to talk about?" "What the fuck is going on with you and those two?" She jerked her head towards Heero and Trowa's bedroom. "What do you mean?" Duo stalled, though he was pretty sure he knew exactly what she meant. Meilin's eyes narrowed dangerously, and Duo actually took a step backwards. "I mean, you and Trowa used to be glued at the hip in Solo Queue, and you used to go running with them, and the three of you had that annoying habit of just... staring at each other and smirking all of the time." "We did?" Duo knew he had done that - he had had to catch himself and force himself to look away, more than once. "Yes. You did. So, wanna tell me what's going on?" Duo shrugged. "Nothing. Just-" "It's not nothing. Ever since your little vacation in the hospital, Heero's KDA has slipped, and-" "What?" Meilin rolled her eyes. "His kill to death ratio has-" "I know what KDA is, Meilin. I just- you mean I'm making him worse?" "That is not what I said. For fuck's sake, all of you boys are idiots." She growled in frustration, and then drew in a deep breath. "What I said was that ever since you've been back, something has been off with Heero. I did not say you were making him worse." Duo stared at her, and under the strength of her irritated glare, he nodded to concede the point. "Okay, but you think it's related to me; that's why you're here." "Yes," she agreed. "So tell me what the fuck is going on. Because when I asked Heero, he just did his wounded puppy routine and refused to say anything - and then Trowa swooped in and was all 'just drop it,' and I fucking swear, those two might as well be dating for all that they..." She trailed off, and it seemed that she was either staring intently at the Frozen shower curtain - courtesy of Relena - or was staring through it. After a moment, she started to frown, and she turned to Duo with narrowed eyes. Immediately, Duo realized he was going to be in deep shit. "Duo." "Meilin." "Heero and Trowa are a thing, aren't they?" "Um, when you say 'a thing', do you mean like-" "I mean, they fuck each other." Duo sighed. He should lie. He should make up something, or- "You've got to be fucking kidding me." Or, he could keep his mouth shut for a second too long and she could figure it out on her own. "How did I not see it?" She ran a hand through her hair and groaned. "It's so fucking obvious! No wonder Trowa is so damn protective of Heero and-" She turned back to Duo again, as if only just remembering he was there. "And you." "Me, what?" Duo asked, defensive and more than a little intimidated. He was a lot intimidated. "You..." Her brows were drawn together as she studied Duo and tried to figure out how he fit into all of this. He could save her the trouble and just tell her, but a small part of him was still hoping she wouldn't connect the dots. A small, stupid part of him. "Which one did you make a move on?" "What?" "That's what happened, right? Sometime before you almost died, you tried to make a move on one of them, and I guess it came out during... No, no. They aren't pissed at you like that. They keep- they keep hovering and glaring at you when you don't eat, and... Oh my god. They made a pass at you, and you turned them down?" She wasn't entirely wrong, but she wasn't correct either. "What do you mean, they glare at me when I don't eat? I eat just fine." She rolled her eyes. "Duo, you're so bad at making it look like you're eating fine that even Quatre has noticed. He's going to ambush you about it in the van, by the way. Some kind of intervention or something." "Today? Before the game?" Duo was surprised they had noticed, surprised they cared, but he also really, really didn't want to deal with that before a game. "After, I think. Heero and I both voted for after the game, Relena, Sally and Quatre voted for before, and Trowa-" "Wait, there was a vote about me?" Meilin sighed. "Yes, Duo, there was a vote about you." "When?" She shrugged. "Yesterday. You had, like, two bites of dinner and then left to go practice again, and we voted." Duo glared at her. "I don't need a fucking committee to run my life, Meilin." She lifted an eyebrow in clear disagreement, but she didn't say anything. Duo sighed. "I just... I'm just not very hungry these days." "And how are you sleeping?" "Like crap, which is normal, so-" "No, sleeping like crap is not normal, Duo. Staying up until two or three is, for us, sure, but then you need to actually sleep. You aren't sleeping, you aren't eating, you aren't happy- Duo, have you talked to anyone about all of this?" Duo frowned. "About what? My life?" He shrugged. "I mean, I talk to Hilde when she has the time, but I don't want to dump all of my shit on her. I mean, she had to deal with me after Solo all last year and..." "So you've just been dealing - or not dealing - with all of this on your own?" Duo sighed. "It's not- Everyone has shit in their lives that they have to deal with. I'm not special or-" "Oh no, you're special. You're a very special kind of idiot. Does Hilde know about Heero and Trowa?" Duo shrugged. "Yeah, I told her about it in the hospital, after I'd gone and fucked up everything." Meilin raised an eyebrow, clearly curious, but she didn't ask for clarification. "So this just became a thing? You three?" Duo sighed again. "How long?" "I... I mean, we sort of messed around at the end of the spring split but... And then we've been... a thing or whatever for the last few weeks, until I went to the hospital and-" "Wait, they dumped you because you almost died?" Duo glared at her. "I- No. I don't know what happened. I just... The night before all of that, I..." Duo realized that maybe he was as much of an idiot as Meilin claimed he was. "What?" she prompted him. "I told them I needed space. But I just- I just meant I wanted to sleep in my room because I thought I was getting kicked in the side." He rubbed the raised line of his healing incision. "I kept waking up in pain and..." "And your body was trying to kill you for weeks and you ignored it," Meilin summarized. Duo nodded. Did Heero and Trowa really think he had ended things? They had been pissed, that night - and the next morning - about Duo saying he needed space. But they hadn't talked to him about it. They had, according to Meilin, been worried about Duo when he collapsed, and they had been there at the hospital that first night. But when Duo had come home... they hadn't tried to talk to him. Not except- Duo sighed. Last Saturday, when Quatre had wanted to go over the stats and Heero and Trowa had pushed against him, and then, for the first time, the three of them had been alone and they had been concerned about him and- and Duo had said fuck this. "You having a realization about something?" Meilin asked. Duo nodded. "Yeah. I'm a fucking idiot." "That's what I've been trying to tell you!" He glared at her, but she just smirked back at him. "Now that you've realized that, how are we going to get your shit back together?" "We?" She nodded. "Yeah. You backed me up when I was miserable on my birthday, and like I said before, I know what it's like to be the only one- Well," she smirked, "it turns out you aren't the only gay guy on the team, after all, but you are the only one who's out and... someone's gotta help you." Duo snorted and shook his head. "Help me what? Fix the mess I've made of fucking everything? Because I'm thinking a time machine might be what I need for that." "Why don't we start with a decent breakfast and, I dunno, the equally hi-tech solution of communication? Because that seems like your biggest problem - you aren't communicating with them or with us. Everyone wants you to be healthy and happy, Duo. And, you know, helping us come in first place. But when you just... hide from everyone, we can't help you." Duo sighed and shook his head. "Yeah, I guess. I just..." "Do not make me start thinking you're even more of a pain in the ass than your brother was. Is. Was." She shrugged. "Don't be worse than him. Because when I left that team, he said a bunch of shit to me and I punched him in the dick - and I don't think you want that same treatment." Duo raised an eyebrow. "You're threatening me into being happy?" "Is it working?" "I don't know yet." -o- Duo managed to eat more than half a piece of toast - he ate a whole piece and two strips of bacon while Meilin watched over him - and he did feel better. Not really because he had eaten more, but because it was finally nice to know that someone in the house knew - that now there was at least one person he didn't have to hide things from. And, all things considered, he was lucky it had been Meilin who had confronted him and figured things out. When they piled into the van to go over to the studio for the game that afternoon, the seating arrangements the same awkward ones from last week - Duo beside Trowa, Meilin and Heero in the back - Quatre waited until Sally had started to drive before ambushing Duo. "Duo, we're concerned that-" "It's not a problem anymore, Quatre," Meilin interrupted him. Duo, seated between them, saw Quatre frown and look back at her. "What-" "Everything's under control; no need to make a fuss about it." Quatre looked from Meilin to Duo, who felt his cheeks flame with embarrassment and failure because he couldn't even get his shit together enough for his team to trust him to eat on his own. He could also feel Trowa's steady gaze on him, and Duo turned, fully expecting Trowa to be glaring or scowling at him. But Trowa just looked thoughtful. Duo drew in a deep breath. "I'm working on it," he said in a low voice, more to Trowa than to the entire van, even though he was sure the others heard him. "Okay." Trowa turned away, facing back towards the front, and Duo tried to decipher the meaning in that one word. Did Trowa believe him? Did Trowa trust him? Did Trowa care? "How can we help?" Quatre asked, breaking through Duo's thoughts. "We're here for you, Duo. And- We care about you. All of us." Duo sighed and leaned back in his seat. "It's... I appreciate that you all care. But..." "You aren't on your own, Duo. You aren't in this alone." He turned back to look at Heero as he spoke up, and Duo had to swallow several times before he could respond to that. "I just... I'm sorry. I'm really fucking sorry about everything. I-" "Stop apologizing," Meilin cut in. "You were kind of an idiot, but you were looking out for yourself and no one else has been around to do that for awhile. We get it." She glared at both Heero and Trowa. "So stop apologizing for it. Just... start talking to us. All of us about shit." "I'll try," Duo promised. He looked toward the front of the van, returning Quatre's small smile before looking to see that Relena was peering around her seat at him, and that Sally was looking at him through the rear-view mirror. He forced a grin onto his face. "Well, now that the boring shit's out of the way, who's ready to kick some ass and win today?" ~ * ~ |
