"Regained "

Written By: Artemis

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters are copyright to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties. I make no money with this fic.

Rating: NC 17

Warnings: yaoi lemon, masturbation, angst, violence, language

Pairings: 6x2, 3x4, mention of 13+11, R+1

Summary: Sequel to Interfacing: Lost. GAIA, the new alliance, fights its first battle in Antarctica; Duo and Zechs begin to rebuild their relationship

"Regained"

Chapter 1


Vast whiteness stretched beneath him, and vast blueness above. "Antarctica," Quatre sighed with relief. The seven-hour flight was coming to an end. The alliance's new home was in the distance before him. //We have so much work ahead of us... I'll need to convince the others to join.//

His radio crackled to life then. It was Zechs letting him know everything was ready for them to land. In twenty minutes they would be on the ground.

//Zechs still seems so sad,// Quatre thought. Then he remembered what Duo had said on their way back to Arabia about his early morning talk with Zechs. How they had sat together, holding hands, and had agreed to start their relationship over. But what Duo didn't say, and didn't need to say, was that it was a clouded hope. That he was afraid things wouldn't work out between them. That nothing definite had been planned.

//I just hope he shows up,// Quatre thought suddenly. Maybe he shouldn't have let Duo fly off on his own. Taking another route to Antarctica. He could be so unpredictable, especially recently. And very passionate both in love and in hate, unfortunately for Zechs Merquise, who had experienced both ends of that spectrum. //Poor Duo. I don't know if he has the personal resources to figure this all out. All he has known in his life is loss.//

//I'll just have to be there... for the both of them,// he thought and began making final preparations to land at Barclay Base.

Zechs Merquise felt a coiled excitement within his belly as he landed his carrier at Barclay Base, Antarctica. Since he'd left Lake Victoria a week ago, his life had been revitalized, filled to the brim with hope and love and so much joy it could hardly be contained... and then all that had been ripped away in a double-edged accusation: "OZ officer", "Rapist". Only the second half of that truly hurt, for he was all but gone from OZ when he'd encountered Duo Maxwell in a GlobalNet chat room. Now things were better between himself and the black-garbed Gundam pilot, but the damage to his psyche had been done. Now... he could relax back into the safe Lightning Count persona with his return to a command position. For now.

//He still has no idea,// Zechs mused, directing the carrier to taxi in toward the hangar. //That accusation... to accuse me of such a crime of heinous personal violation... he can't know how that makes my skin crawl. The very thought of abusing anyone like that is so abhorrent to me, then to be accused of committing same... It's the complete antithesis of everything I am! I am Peacecraft enough in this, I suppose. Though I am a soldier and have killed in battle, for some reason this, *this* represents something far, far beyond that evil necessity. And perhaps... perhaps because I was so accused, I have begun to doubt, wonder whether I did indeed seek to take advantage of his youth and virginity... damn...// He sighed and set the thoughts aside.

"We're here," he radioed the base's tower personnel, who would then signal the hangar personnel to open for them. Not that there were so many to communicate with; Barclay Base would operate with a skeleton crew of about eight, the other twelve people already here from Lake Victoria being engineers and mechanics.

The hangar doors opened, and the two carriers taxied inside. Hastily Zechs disembarked, seeing mechanics doubling as hangar workers running past to see to Tallgeese's removal from the belly of the carrier. Then he saw a tall figure in an engineer's jumpsuit striding in his direction. //Here we go...//

"Meiser," Zechs greeted his chief engineer, extended a hand. "We made it."

Eric Meiser, who'd actually been surprised to learn once that he was a couple years older than the famous Colonel Zechs, was studying the face of the man with whom he'd thrown in his destiny along with the other refugees from Lake Victoria. //My God,// he thought, his mouth going dry, //he's absolutely breath-taking without the mask. I never, ever dreamed I'd ever get to see his real face... shit, but he's...// He cut off the thought even as he extended his hand to shake the hand of his superior. //He's your boss, Meiser!//

"Yes, sir," he managed to say, recovering his composure. "Welcome to Antarctica!" He noted that Zechs's handshake was precisely firm and professional and nothing else. Recovering his hand, Meiser gestured further into the deep hangar bay. "They've just finished setting up Gundam 01 now, sir. We only got in four hours ago ourselves."

"Very good, Meiser," Zechs replied formally, his sharp eyes taking in detail. Deeper in the massive hangar bay he could see the massive figure of Wing Gundam being installed into a construction niche. "Everything appears in good order. Thanks... this was a lot to ask of you." Beyond the man he saw Quatre approaching, having left his carrier as well. //And how soon will my Duo arrive, I wonder?//

"Thanks, Colonel... I mean, Zechs," Meiser responded, a bit flustered. "We could not remain in OZ knowing you felt it necessary to leave yourself, sir. We trust your reasons."

//They have no idea,// Zechs mused, his heart sinking. //Blind obedience is not healthy for any organization...// "Meiser, I want you to meet my new ally," he said, gesturing at the approaching young man. "Quatre Raberba Winner, this is my chief engineer, Eric Meiser. Meiser, this is Quatre, pilot of the Gundam Sandrock, the one we called 04."

"Pleased to meet you, er... Quatre," Meiser muttered, gaping at the smallish, blond boy. His expression fell; how the hell could this child pilot a Gundam?

"Meiser!" Zechs snapped, reading his subordinate all too well. "This is a *Gundam pilot*!"

"That's all right, Zechs," Quatre said calmly. "We Gundam pilots are often underestimated because of our size... which can work to our advantage," he said with a grin. When the chief engineer still stood gaping, Quatre held out his hand in greeting. "I'm pleased to meet you, too, Eric."

"Er, sure," Meiser murmured, blanching at having been called out by his superior. Why had he gotten so warm suddenly, hearing the sharpness in Zechs's voice?

"You'd do well, Meiser," Zechs was saying, gesturing the way as he began to accompany Quatre to the main facility of the base, "to watch your step around these pilots. They may be young, but they're highly skilled, incredibly focused, and very committed." //And deadly,// he thought to himself unwillingly, recalling Duo's "God of Death" persona.

"Yes, sir," Meiser replied, falling into step behind. "Sir, the Tallgeese and the Gundam 04 will be installed in the construction area awaiting your orders."

"None for now, Meiser," Zechs sighed. "Another pilot should be coming in a few hours. Be sure the hangar personnel are ready and have these carriers cleared."

"Yes, sir!" The dismissal had been clear. Meiser fell back to see to the order.

"Did you notice," Zechs murmured to Quatre as they walked, "that all insignia have been removed? I wasn't quite expecting that, though it is a relief. It makes it easier for all of us."

"Yes, I think it's a good thing," Quatre nodded. //It will save us from another one of Duo's tirades, at least.// He walked with the man in companionable silence for a minute and then decided this might be the only opportunity he had to speak to Zechs alone. "Zechs, I hope you don't mind me asking, but how are you doing? I understand you and Duo spoke early this morning."

The former OZ Colonel walked on, a single, curt nod the only indication that he'd heard the question. Finally Zechs indicated they should proceed down a hallway leading away from the hangar. "I'll show you the commander's office; we can speak more privately there," he murmured.

Once inside the office, Zechs gestured for Quatre to make himself comfortable. "Would you like some tea or coffee? I'm sure I can find some fixings around here somewhere."

"Coffee, if you have it, please," he said finally, looking around the comfortable, but spartan office. "Your base is quite impressive, Zechs. But then everything about you has impressed me so far."

"Thank you for the compliment," Zechs murmured, filling a pot he'd found with water from the office's private bathroom. "There seems to be some instant coffee, but that's it. I believe they're still unloading the supplies sent from Lake Victoria." He set the small pot on an electric heating plate to boil, then turned back to his companion. "Now," he began with a small smile, "I thank you for your concern for me, Quatre. Duo and I did speak at length." He sighed, sobering. "It's going to take us sometime to rebuild... what we had."

"Of course," Quatre nodded, pulling up a chair to sit. He could feel Zechs was still suffering a great hurt... a hurt that was laced in the man's tone and careful words. Duo, on the other hand, seemed to have set aside the majority of his initial pain. //Zechs is the one who needs time. They handle things so differently.// "This whole thing is a terrible misunderstanding," Quatre said gently. "But I'm sure the love that you both feel for each other will pull you through."

Zechs had found some ceramic cups that seemed clean. He set them with the container of coffee and spoons on the edge of the desk, then sat in a chair beside Quatre. "Love can't erase the past," he murmured, resting his elbows on the arms of the chair, then steepling his fingers. "Time, on the other hand, may work some magic. Trust... has been eroded."

"You think time rather than love will heal you?" Quatre asked, trying to rush to an understanding of this man after only a couple of days. And he did need to know. He wanted so much to help bring Zechs and Duo back together, since his own involvement in their breakup was all too apparent. "Please tell me if I'm prying too much, but when you say that trust has been eroded... is it Duo's love for you that you don't trust?"

"You're not prying," Zechs replied quietly. "You were instrumental in the whole thing." //He wants to help, and no wonder... he's the one who told Duo of my identity in the first place...//

He stood smoothly to check on the water. Seeing that it was not yet boiling, he turned back to face Quatre, leaning on the credenza, folding his arms over his chest. "No, I know he loves me now. I don't trust my own instincts - right now, they're still screaming 'protect, back off' - and I don't trust the part of him that is still alien to me. I don't *know* him in too many ways, Quatre."

"But surely you realize that you know him in the best ways," Quatre grinned, and then stood also. "Look, I've only known Duo a little over a month myself, but what I've seen is that he's very open with his emotions. He doesn't tend to hide the way he's feeling... good or bad. I actually find that very refreshing," he said and chuckled thinking of just how intense Duo could get.

"But have you been on the receiving end of it in the manner that I have less than two days ago?" Zechs responded with a wry expression. "You might not find *that* so refreshing. Not when your life is being threatened and you are accused of being a veritable monster." His expression went cold and his voice dropped lower. "You can't imagine how that made me feel, Quatre. To be accused of... that."

"No, I suppose not," the younger blond said softly, clenching his fists as he felt the other man's pain hit him like a tidal wave. "Please..." he said, a little choked by the severity of emotions. "Please don't think I'm trying to make excuses for Duo... Allah knows he wouldn't want that. But he was reacting to his own sense of betrayal." He stopped then, seeing Zechs tighten further. //The pain in him is almost unbearable. Duo, do you have any idea?//

Taking a slow breath, Quatre began again. "You wouldn't know this, of course, but when I cornered Duo in the fruit market about your identity, he wouldn't believe me at first. In fact, he tried to choke me... Thank goodness Rashid was there to pull him off me," Quatre said, stepping closer to Zechs. "He was ruined by the news, Zechs. I've never seen him so devastated. He was sick right there on the street."

Sucking his breath in sharply, Zechs turned around. Fortunately, the water was boiling, and he could slip back into the role of host while his heart quailed in terror of the thought of his Dancer so brutally torn emotionally. Stepping past the little Arabian as if he wasn't there, Zechs retrieved the cups, poured measures of coffee into both with barely shaking hands, poured the water, then managed to hand a cup to his guest before turning away again to take a sip from his. The horror of what Quatre had described shook him in ways he could not begin to describe.

"I'm sorry, Zechs," Quatre whispered. //He's torn apart by this. My God, he loves Duo... Dancer so much.// He stood motionless a moment, staring at the stiff back, hoping he had done the right thing by telling Zechs. When the man didn't respond verbally, Quatre became nervous and decided to break the silence. "I really think he slipped into his God of Death persona to shut himself off from the pain. His life has been nothing but loss... like yours. He just couldn't face losing someone else he loved... and still loves."

"Yes," Zechs admitted, taking a deep breath. "We both have had too many losses. Well." He took a longer sip from his coffee and fought to steady himself. //I don't have time for this... *we* don't have time... but time it will take. Duo, why aren't you here now? I need the real Duo around so I don't think about... that one... the one that hurt, the one that hurt me...//

//I can feel him aching for Duo now... good. And where is Duo anyway?// "He was genuinely pleased that you spoke this morning," Quatre grinned and then sipped his coffee. "This alliance will give you both a chance to work together. Learn more about each other."

Zechs nodded, taking another swig of coffee. "Yes, I think we need that the most, Quatre. I have a Gundam pilot to get to know, and he has an ex-OZ rebel to discover. He won't have seen me in my soldier's element at all, and he certainly hasn't seen me fight, nor I him."

Another deep breath. "Quatre, there's something else I have not yet told you." //This is too important to hold back from my new ally,// he thought somberly.

"What is it, Zechs?" Quatre asked, a bit of concern seeping into his tone as he continued to stare at that broad back. //God, I hope I haven't misjudged him.//

Turning around to face his ally, Zechs looked into the honest, aquamarine gaze of the small, blond boy, the pilot of the Gundam Sandrock. "Quatre, I trust you, and I'm about to entrust you with some information that is critical to our alliance. But... do you trust *me*?"

Quatre looked up at the tall man. //He's so serious. I wonder if he was this way with Duo?// "I'll admit to being cautious around you at first... when I didn't know your story. But I always *felt* your goodness," he said, putting his hand over his heart. "I feel the emotions of those around me... And lately that hasn't been easy for me," he grinned, knowing the man would understand. "But more than that, you're a Peacecraft and I admire and respect that family. And everything you've told me so far has been true." He set down his cup on the credenza and stood before Zechs in a self-assured stance. "Yes, Zechs. I trust you."

//He... *feels* the emotions of those around him?// Zechs wondered, gaping at the boy for a moment. Then blackness seemed to pass momentarily before his eyes. "You should not trust me because I am a Peacecraft," he muttered. "I have been a soldier far too long to be considered a scion of my pacifist family, I fear." Then he straightened, getting himself in hand again. "But I thank you, Quatre."

Zechs laid the cup down on the desk and moved smoothly behind it, sitting in the commander's chair. "Very well. This room is secure; the handful of officers I'd sent down here a month ago have been over this place top to bottom." He glanced up at the young man, very serious now. "Please, be seated."

Quatre nodded and seated himself in the chair in front of the desk. //So, he doesn't feel worthy of the Peacecraft name. Then maybe this alliance will help in that regard as well,// he grinned internally, and then turned his thoughts to Zechs's extreme caution. "Please," he said fervently. "Do you have something to tell me that will affect the alliance?"

The older man nodded. "In a good way, Quatre. But please forgive me for not informing you of this sooner. We will have support for our alliance from an unusual source." Zechs took a deep breath again. //Here we go...// "That supporter is an individual who happens to be highly placed within the Romefeller Foundation. He, like myself, is deeply disturbed by the direction OZ and Romefeller is going. But unlike myself, he feels he can do the most good by remaining right where he is... for now." //Treize, forgive me,// he thought to himself. //I had to. You must know that.//

"Hmm," Quatre sighed. //So this is why he wanted to be sure I trusted him. He wants me to trust his judgment on this.// "I think it's wise that you didn't mention this sooner," Quatre said calmly. "It's a lot to absorb." He leaned back in his chair considering the new information. "You told us that Romefeller are the ones we should be fighting now. And this supporter? You know him well, but are hesitant to reveal his identity?"

Zechs blew his breath out, relieved. "Yes, I've known him for many years. And until I have a chance to speak to him again, I would prefer not to reveal him just yet. He knew I had to leave OZ, of course. Actually, Quatre, he encouraged me to seek out the Gundam pilots and ally with them if I could. Ironic that two of them happened to find *me*." //And a worse and sick irony that I would fall in love with one of them! Treize will laugh himself silly at me when I tell him.//

"I'd like to know the identity of our supporter as soon as you feel comfortable," Quatre put in, making it clear that the confidentiality was all right, for the time being. "And as for us finding you... well, it's just lucky I guess that you and Duo have a thing for men with long hair," he chuckled.

"And I suppose someday I can laugh at that," Zechs murmured, then was able to give Quatre a genuine little smile. "Yes, I will ask our supporter about being revealed. He will have to be careful and in truth, his role in all this may be far more dangerous than ours. He must avoid discovery in that den of snakes."

//Zechs, I think you must need Duo very badly. Just as he needs you,// Quatre thought solemnly. Reference to their supporter within Romefeller quickly diverted the younger man's attention to matters of the alliance. "I understand about the danger he must be in. I think we might want to wait to tell the other pilots this information. Wait until we have their full support and you can say more."

Zechs nodded in agreement. "Yes, and I'll need you behind me," he replied, never so glad that it was Quatre Winner who'd befriended Duo Maxwell as in that moment. "Quatre, your understanding and reason are very welcome in this uncertain time. Thank you. Just the fact that you were able to bring Duo and myself through darkness into a lighter time puts me deep in your debt. I know your men went to great lengths to clear me."

"Thank you," Quatre said with a grin. "It has always been about seeking the truth." //And I won't rest until you and Duo are back together again,// he thought a bit sadly. "I am happy to give you any support I can," he added, and stood to stretch. "Gee, I could really use a nap. Unless there's something else you think we need to discuss right now?"

The tall blond stood as well, military-straight. "Nothing I can think of, and it has been a very long day already, so we should find our quarters. Besides, hopefully we have a mutual and larger-than-life friend with a long braid who will be blowing in here possibly within the hour. We'll need to be alert for him!" //At least I hope desperately it's sooner rather than later,// Zechs thought, anxious about actually getting on the path to recovery with Duo.

Quatre couldn't help but laugh at Zechs's new found humor. "I'll say we need to be alert. Duo can be quite a handful!" the young Gundam pilot snickered. "And of course, I also want to be at my best when Trowa arrives," he said, his cheeks pinking.

"Ah," Zechs responded, recalling Duo's mention of Quatre's "whining" about his boyfriend. //I am *not* going to think about Duo as being a "handful",// he told himself ruthlessly. //Way too suggestive...// "Trowa would be your boyfriend, yes?" He smiled, thinking it would be good for Quatre to have someone, too, who cared for him.

"Um, yes," Quatre said, shyly. "He has wonderful green eyes," he added and then blushed fiercely. //I can't believe I just said that!// "Maybe someday I can tell you how we met."

//Charming boy... Trowa is a lucky man,// Zechs thought, smiling at the boy's pink cheeks. "I look forward to that very much. Now..." He gestured at the door. "Let's go find those quarters, shall we?"

Quatre nodded brightly and together the two new allies left, each thinking with great anticipation about their first meeting with someone important to them in this place.

(tbc)


Chapter 2

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