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"Lost "Written By: Artemis Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters are
copyright to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties.
I make no money with this fic. Rating: NC 17 Warnings: implied yaoi, angst, violence, language Pairings: 6x2, mention of 4+3 Summary: Sequel to Interfacing: Found. Quatre
has some shocking information for Duo about his new lover; there's
trouble in Cairo... "Lost" 12) "D...Duo, what happened in the hangar?" Quatre asked hastily. It had worried him when Duo had stalked out so angrily, then a couple minutes later Zechs had come out. But the blond man had been sorrowed, unwilling to speak, and unable to meet their wondering glances. Only a very few words had been exchanged all the way back to the house. "I'll tell you what happened... He wouldn't let me touch him! Do you realize you've totally ruined my life!?" Duo yelled, and then stalked past the boy to cross the room to the open window. He looked outside onto the pretty courtyard. Everything was so well cared for in Quatre's life... his homes... his family... his personal army. Duo shot back around finally to face his stunned friend. "Why'd you have to fuck with my life?!" "Oh, Duo, I'm so sorry!" Quatre gasped, feeling the other boy's anger acutely. If Duo was willing to touch Zechs, then it must mean he really did want to try to get back together with the tall blond. But Zechs... [He was hurting too much still to be touched,] Quatre thought, his eyes blinking back tears with difficulty. "I hated to have to do that, you know that, Duo," he tried to say, but the other pilot interrupted him. "All I know is that Zechs hates me. And it's all because of you... you little meddling fool!" Duo shouted. He really didn't care if the entire complex could hear him. Even if Rashid came running to his Master's rescue. Heck, that'd just give Duo a reason to get into a fist fight. Something he was itching for about now anyway. "Duo!" Quatre felt his own gorge rising; he'd been putting up with enough of the fallout of what he'd done out of nothing but concern for his friend. "Zechs doesn't hate you - he's been through a lot and just isn't ready to be close to you or anyone right now!" He frowned as he spoke, trying not to yell back. "Damn it! Don't you see what a mess this is? What I did to him? What this has done to me?" he asked, and began to pace back and forth in front of his friend. "And now you expect me to form an alliance... All of us like one big happy family." He threw up his hands at that, totally giving up on how this would all work out. "Well, it ain't gonna happen, Quatre," he said, stopping in front of the other boy. "I can't be his enemy anymore and I certainly can't be his lover... So, what does that make me? Well, I'll tell you... It makes me nothing!" Quatre had folded his arms over his chest and let Duo pace and rant, but finally he had to speak. "Duo, there is an awful lot between enemy and lover! What about friendship? What about whatever the heck I thought you and I had as friends? Is that nothing, too?" Internally he was beginning to shake, fearing the answer. He'd been so lonely since Trowa had left after New Edwards; Duo had been a brightness in his life he'd needed. "Friends?" Duo asked. Yeah, he'd forgotten about that. He'd been so focused on his own pain in the last 24 hours plus that he'd very nearly forgotten his friendship with Quatre. "Oh, God, Quatre, I'm so sorry. It just hurts so damn much," he said, putting his hand over his heart and beginning to cry. "Zechs wouldn't even be alive right now if it wasn't for you." And with those words he collapsed sobbing into his friend's arms. "Duo, Duo," Quatre murmured, holding his friend tightly, a few tears loosening themselves down his cheek as well. [At last - this is what he really needs, to really cry it all out... *and* to be honest about it.] "He's alive and he does love you, Duo," he said soothingly, rubbing little circles on the other boy's back. "Don't worry about me. I'm just glad we can be okay." "We're okay, Quatre," Duo sighed through tears. [I don't know how he does it. He's so willing to help... I just wish I could believe him about what he feels. That Zechs really does love me.] Duo pulled back then to look into his friend's comforting eyes. "You're my best friend. You know that?" he asked with a shaky little grin. "Yeah, yeah," Quatre said, embarrassed, though smiling. He gave Duo a last squeeze, then let him go, wiping at his own eyes. "I just really think you need to give Zechs some time. Forgive me again for stating something uncomfortable, but he's still trying to cope with what's happened... being nearly killed and being accused of... you know." He didn't want to say the word. "Clearly he's a very caring individual." "You have no idea," Duo grinned more broadly, remembering his Wolf. It felt glorious to have happy images in his mind for a change. Images of a laughing, passionate and strikingly beautiful man. All his own. "He was the most gentle, considerate man I've ever met," Duo told his friend. "And he didn't even mind me going on and on about things," he said with a chuckle. "Wow, that's amazing, Duo," Quatre replied, smiling. "You two really were so happy, then?" [And I'll do everything I can to get you to back to that, I promise,] Quatre added to himself yet again. "Yeah... we were happier than either of us had ever been," Duo said and then his eyes started to water again. "It was perfect... too perfect maybe. And that's why it had to end." [I've lost everyone I ever cared for...] "No, Duo..." Quatre felt again the twinge. [I have to tell him now. I have to tell him what Zechs said.] He clasped his friend by the upper arms, looking into his eyes. "Duo, I need to tell you about something Zechs told me... about you." Duo blinked. "What did he say?" he asked, his heart pounding in his chest. "He said he called you Dancer," Quatre related quietly. "And he said he wasn't sure he could come to love the God of Death... I'd told him about that, sorry. And then, Duo... Zechs told me that he would love Dancer until the day he died. Those were his exact words." The chestnut haired boy looked dumbfounded. "He said that?" he asked in wonder. A warmness, a lightness overcame him and he felt like he would float away. "Yes, he did call me Dancer. He said I had the body of a dancer," he laughed. "And I called him Wolf... for lots of wonderful reasons." Duo felt suddenly delirious, giddy from what Quatre had told him, and he wanted to share everything about his lover with his friend. "We fell in love so quickly, Quatre. That first day we said we loved each other. We shared everything about ourselves.... stories of our childhoods, likes and dislikes, and sex like you wouldn't believe!" he said, blushing. "But there were times when we would just sit and hold each other and talk for hours... and sometimes not talk at all. Can you imagine me not talking?" he asked, laughing with bright eyes. "Only Zechs could do that to me." "Oh, wow, that's so romantic," Quatre said, getting dreamy-eyed for a moment as he remembered how being with Trowa made him feel. But he wasn't about to let this moment get away from Duo. "It sounds so beautiful... and *real*. Duo, it was real, it did happen, and there is still something there." He gave Duo a little shake as if to focus his attention on his words. "What has happened is unfortunate but the bottom line is the love you both found, Duo. Zechs will come around, I'm sure of it! You both need time... and we've got this crazy war going on. Duo, hold onto hope! If you accept nothing of what I've said to you, please, for Dancer and Wolf, hold onto hope!" By the time Quatre finished, Duo was shaking. It was a combination of fear and hope that made him shake. "I'll try, Quatre. Really, I'll try," he said and then thought how he needed to speak to Zechs again. He needed to say 'I'm sorry.' [But I don't think he'll want to speak to me...] Quatre brightened up. "That's my best friend talking!" Impulsively he gave Duo a quick hug. "You feeling better? Not going to take my head off again?" "God, I hope not!" Duo smiled, and ruffled his friend's blond hair. "Yes, I'm feeling lots better... thanks to you." "You're more than welcome," Quatre sighed with relief, still smiling. Then he remembered why he'd come up to Duo's room, besides to check on why he'd run off so angrily. "Duo, I just remembered - I was going to invite you back to my study - Zechs is going to use my computer to call a couple of his subordinates. In a few minutes actually. Will you come?" [I'll see Zechs again,] he thought, his heart thumping a little at the opportunity. He still believed that Zechs didn't want to see him, but he'd just told his friend he'd hope for the best between them. "Yeah, okay," he answered simply. "Thanks," Quatre beamed, then turned for the door. "I'd better get down there. See you there, okay?" "I'll go with you," Duo said, and followed on his friend's heels. Quatre watched as Zechs set up his device on the computer in the study, all too aware of Duo sitting very quietly on the other side of the room. At least Duo had begun to face his true feelings about Zechs. He'd let his anger go and had gotten back in touch with the Duo that Quatre liked so well. Zechs, on the other hand, seemed numb, as if part of his heart had shut down a little. And in this, Quatre's empathy was of no use. "You said this is a security device of your own design?" Rashid asked, watching over the man's shoulder curiously. They'd found the little box in Zechs's belongings, but weren't sure what it was. "Yes," Zechs replied, straightening as he finished his task. "It redirects and scrambles signals so that no one can either trace the message or get more than pieces of it unless they have the matching device on the other end or have a specially encoded security protocol. There are only three of these. [And what else it does, I'll share with you when I need to,] he thought to himself as he sat at the computer/televideo, which had been turned so that the others could see, though the person on the other end would only see Zechs sitting in front. He was hyperaware of Duo's presence in the room as well, but he forced himself to focus on his task at hand. [I will need to talk to him soon,] Zechs told himself firmly. [Explain what happened... but I need sleep first. God, I'm so tired...] "Who are you calling first?" Quatre asked politely. Zechs smiled briefly. "You could call her my right hand man, as it were. Lucrezia Noin. She's been abroad searching for some young friends of yours." [Heero and Trowa,] they all thought. Duo shifted minutely in his chair. [I'll believe he's alive when I see him,] he thought to himself. The call was put through. In moments, a woman with short, purplish-black hair that fell over one indigo eye responded with blank surprise. "Zechs!" Then her eyes narrowed. "What the hell happened to you? And...you're not wearing your mask..." Zechs sighed and looked back at the image of one of his closest friends. "Noin, it's good to see you, too. I will just say that I'm not at Lake Victoria and I'm not yet at Antarctica." She was staring at him, drinking in his appearance. Quatre wondered if she'd ever seen the Colonel's face. "Zechs," Noin continued, frowning, "please tell me... you've done it, haven't you? Is it really over? Are you all right?" [She cares for him,] Duo wondered, recognizing the endearing tone in the woman's voice. [She knew he was going to leave OZ,] Quatre thought with a start. [Oh, Duo, if only my timing could have been a little off!] Zechs took a deep breath to respond. "Noin - yes, it's over. I've left OZ..." "Damn!" she exclaimed, but she was grinning. "I'm proud of you, Zechs! You don't know how I worried about you. Once I heard that OZ inspector was on your tail..." "Noin," Zechs interrupted a little forcefully. "Do you have news for me?" Noin's expression turned wry. "Of course you'd ask. Very well. I've seen them, Zechs. I'm in Gibraltar, and I've seen both of them. Unfortunately I think I'll need to make contact in less than two hours, as I've gotten a whiff through the regular channels that someone else is looking for them as well. So we could be on our way to meet you in Antarctica by the end of the day." "Trowa..." Quatre gasped, and looked to exchange a glance with Duo. "And Heero, could it be true?" Duo shook his head, suddenly feeling the same sense of displacement he'd felt in the hangar. [Everything Zechs has said has been true... even to knowing Heero was still alive! How could he know that?] "You're... not alone there, Zechs?" Noin asked, having heard the voice in the background. "No, I have acquired a new alliance, Noin," Zechs explained. "So you're saying the pilot of 01 is alive... you have seen him?" "Sure, I have," Noin responded. "He fits your description of him to a T. He's still got his left arm taped up, but otherwise he seems to be fine. Remarkable, considering what he went through. So... what's this alliance?" She grinned, relaxing. "A romantic one, I hope," she added with a teasing chuckle. Zechs flushed, turning his face partly away from the others. "We can save the chit-chat for later, Noin. Really! I don't have much time and I have to ask one more thing of you..." Noin gave him a smirk. "Now, Zechs, your new ally is going to have to get used to me. Just because I'm searching for the woman of my dreams doesn't mean I don't love you to pieces..." "Noin!" Zechs blanched. The Gundam pilots looked at one another, eyes wide. She laughed. "Ooops, you mean now that I'm no longer your subordinate I can't talk to you like this? I've put up with OZ protocol long enough and so have you." Zechs groaned, wishing his friend hadn't decided to go casual on him over the televideo... right now. Though it was understandable; he'd insisted on the formality between them due to rank, but had no cause to continue that now in public. "Right. Well, about that other thing, Noin... the Princess?" Noin chuckled again. "Well, I left her in Sank with that old retainer..." "Pargan." "Yeah, that was the old guy's name. I think she wants to start up some sort of educational institute dedicated to the study of pacifism. Figures, huh? At least it will keep her out of trouble for a while." "Thanks, Noin," Zechs sighed. He did *not* need to worry about his sister at a time like this. "I must be going. Good luck on contacting the pilots. You may tell them that I will have pleasant surprises for them in Antarctica as well as the Gundam 01." "Surprises?" Noin winked at him. "Just what have you cooked up, Zechs?" "You'll see," he replied cryptically, sighing. She narrowed her eyes at him again. "Pardon me for saying this, but you look like hell. Unless this is what you do normally look like..." "I'll be fine, I just need a little sleep," Zechs replied. "I need to call Meiser now. I'll see you soon, Noin." "Yes, sir... oops, guess I don't need to do that anymore, huh?" "Whatever. Later, Noin." Zechs shut down the connection and sat back. "And that... was Lucrezia Noin. A very old friend from academy days and a baronet in her own right." "Who's the princess you referred to, Zechs?" Quatre asked. At first they thought the man had fallen asleep, his eyes having fallen closed. Then, after a long pause, Zechs replied slowly, "My sister... who knows nothing of me, which is as it should be. She was but two years old when our parents were killed. Now that the kingdom is liberated, she can lead our people in the Peacecraft pacifist ways. I... cannot." Duo avoided any further glances from Quatre, lost in his own thoughts. [Zechs is so complex... there is so much I didn't know about him. But then you've had your own dark secrets, haven't you, Maxwell?] Then he realized: [Someday I'll be fighting at his side... he'll have to see the God of Death emerge again. I wonder... will I ever get to see Wolf again?] Zechs was already making the connection with his other subordinate. The face of a man with short, reddish-brown hair came on the screen. "Colonel..." He froze, gaping at the image on his screen. "Colonel Zechs, is that you?" His voice was hushed, wondering. "Yes, this is Zechs, Meiser. You don't have to call me Colonel any longer." The man stared a few seconds longer; Duo wondered with a twinge if this man had any personal connection with Zechs. "Er... okay, Zechs. You know, I figured this was what was going on, but of course we engineers don't ask the officers about their business." "Yes. Well, I'm sorry for the shock, Meiser." Zechs leaned his chin on his hand, finding it difficult to stay alert. Noin's chipper call had fairly drained him. "Is that a problem for you?" "No, sir, er, no, not at all." The man recovered his composure. "We're still about four hours from landing at Barclay Base, but they tell me the way has been perfectly clear. Apparently there haven't been any searches near this area yet." "Good man," Zechs murmured. "Then I will presume you have clear flying the rest of the way." "We expect so... Zechs." "And the Gundam?" Meiser relaxed and gave a little smile. "It's finished, of course, except for the repair of the left arm which we will do as soon as Tallgeese returns, per your request. It'll be ready for your rematch in two days." "There won't be a rematch," Zechs replied quietly. "Anyway, I should be there in the morning. Tell the others... of my change in status. If they want to leave, they should be allowed to discretely as long as they can promise to keep our location a secret." The Gundam pilots stirred at this. Clearly Zechs was a man of confident power to be leaving OZ while there were men under his command, in his responsibility. They waited to hear what would surely be outrage at such treatment. "They won't be leaving, sir," Meiser said quietly, surprising them all. "I've been around the staff and engineering crew long enough to know how they feel about serving under you." Zechs paused to rub the bridge of his nose with fingertips; Duo remembered what Zechs had once told him about being put on a pedestal by his underlings. "I would never presume... thank you, Meiser. Even so, tell them, please." "Yes, sir." The "sir" came more easily, and they expected it might stick now, not as an honorific given to an officer, but a mark of respect for a man who'd earned it. "Safe arrival, Meiser. I look forward to seeing everyone sometime tomorrow. I will have some very special guests with me as well." "We'll take care of everything, sir!" The note of pride was unmistakable. "Merquise... out." He shut off the transmission and turned to his host. "There, it's all in place. Thank you for allowing me to contact my people." Quatre smiled. "My pleasure, Zechs. Everything is in motion on our end as well. I've ordered three carriers to be ready to take off from Al B'ir at dusk; two will be carrying our Gundams. We'll rendezvous with the Tallgeese to pick up with the third." "Ah, about that, Quatre," Duo murmured, arms crossed over his chest, his head bowed, eyes closed. "I'll take over the carrier with my Gundam myself. Got some stuff to do." The little blond gaped at his friend. "Aren't you coming to Antarctica with us, Duo?" He noticed that Zechs was looking the other way, lost in his own thoughts as if no one else was in the room. "Oh, I'm coming... just on my own," Duo replied, then stretched and folded his arms behind his head, yawning. "Call it my independent streak." [And the fact that I'm still not 100% sure this isn't an OZ trap.] Quatre sighed. "I suppose we'll see you there, then. Zechs..." "Hmmmm?" the older blond glanced back over. "You should get some rest. The Maguanacs can take care of everything else." "Very well." He rose slowly to his feet. "Gentlemen..." Quatre noted that Duo's eyes followed the tall figure out the door. [Duo, I hope you know what you're doing,] he thought to himself.
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