"Crisis"

Written By: Artemis

Disclaimer: Gundam Wing and its characters are copyright to Sunrise, Bandai, Sotsu Agency, and associated parties. I make no money with this fic.

Rating: NC 17

Warnings: yaoi lemon including rimming, angst, violence, language, reference to past NCS involving a minor, death, angst.

Pairings: 6x2, 3x4

Summary: Sequel to Interfacing: Regained. GAIA prepares to go into space and announce itself to the world; Duo and Zechs' relationship goes through its own crisis.

"Crisis "

23)

Embarrassment, fear, and hope warred within Duo as he was carried back through the halls to Zechs's room. The embarrassment had made him struggle at first when Zechs had so unceremoniously picked him up and slung him over his strong shoulder. Like a willful child, he had been scooped out of the public eye to be counseled in private.

But the struggle and the shame soon ended as they disappeared down the halls and the prospect of being alone together became real. Then a mix of fear and hope took over as Zechs's words from the hangar thrummed inside him. "There is nothing for me without you," Zechs had said. Oh, how Duo wanted to believe that. He replayed those words again and again as they made their way to privacy. Hoping to let go of the ache and the fear that he would never share this man's warmth again.

Upon reaching his room, Zechs deftly got the door unlocked and open one-handed, then entered and closed it again with his boot toe. Because of his burden, he did not look down to see that an envelope lay on the floor inside the door. As he walked in, his boot sent the envelope skittering to slide part way underneath the sofa beside the door.

Immediately Zechs strode to his bed and set Duo gently down upon it in a sitting position, then, still silent but for a little grunt, he sat as well, effectively wrapping arms and legs around his elusive lover. He felt Duo tremble against him, then realized they both were shaking. "Stay..." he croaked at last. "S...stay..."

As wonderful as Zechs felt against him, warm and solid, Duo could not return the embrace. He feared that the instant he took the other man in his arms, this, too, would end. He couldn't risk the pain again, not when he wasn't sure of Zechs's intentions. "I'm afraid," Duo said, shakily, his arms at his sides like some lifeless doll's. It felt wrong, so wrong not giving back to Zechs, but the fear was just too strong.

"I...I know," Zechs managed to say, his voice still tight. "I'll hold you for both of us then, until you know... until you believe. D...Duo, it's over. My nightmares are over, I feel it. I hated having to wait to tell you this morning... then you disappeared again! I wanted to tell you so badly... oh, God, Duo, I love you so much..." He began to rock gently, his arms tightening around the slender body of his beloved.

"Then you're really not breaking up with me?" Duo asked, bravely though he winced at his own question. "That's why I've been hiding from you... I thought that's what you wanted to talk to me about." He pulled back a little to look up into Zechs's face. "I just couldn't face that, Zechs... you leaving me." And then he ducked his head down, instinctively burying his face in his lover's chest. But he still resisted the urge to hold the man.

Zechs only got a quick glimpse of red-rimmed blue eyes before the cap ducked again and Duo hid his face from him against his coat. Gently lifting the cap off Duo's head and setting it aside, he pressed a kiss against the unruly chestnut hair, and ran his hand up to the root of the braid.

"I'm not breaking up with you, Duo, not in a million years," he sighed deeply. "It was the nightmares... I had to tell you about the nightmares... and my memories that came back when I was talking to Dr. Sally. And my last dream, just last night..." He shut his eyes tightly, remembering. "You came to me as an angel with white wings, Duo, and you brought my childhood friend to me. He helped me remember the rest... about the man... the gun. Don't you see? That's why I panicked at seeing your gun... that's why..."

Zechs shook his head, unwilling to recall the bad memories of Cairo. "But I forgave you... you didn't know, Duo, and I didn't either. I'd never faced a gun like that since. I don't blame *you*. It was him..."

The boy looked up again, loving the slight pressure at the back of his neck where he could feel Zechs's hand on his braid. "You dreamt I was an angel? That's hard to imagine," Duo said, shaking his head as he remembered angels in a painting at the Maxwell Orphanage. [I could never be like that.]

"And Sally helped you... that's great." [So he talked to Sally... Is that because he couldn't find me to talk to?] Duo felt a little pang of guilt at that, unhappy that he hadn't been a part of Zechs's recovery.

That guilt also made him feel like there was another piece of the puzzle still missing. Like the piece that explained what Zechs and Heero were talking about the day before. The conversation that had started Duo running. ['The sooner he knows, the sooner he can deal with it,' Heero had said,] Duo thought, still believing that those words referred to Zechs and Heero being an item.

"You were talking to Heero yesterday," Duo said, sharply. "What were you talking about?"

Zechs felt his heart pounding. Although Duo's little query about the angel comment was the first sign of real sanity he'd seen in his lover all day, they clearly had far to go yet. He took a deep breath, looking into the other's eyes, wondering at the vehement question. "My nightmares, of course," he replied, shaking his head slightly. "Heero advised me to tell you about them. I looked for you, but when I talked to you over the radio and it was clear you didn't want to see me... that's when I went to talk to Sally Po."

"Oh," Duo said with a sigh. [Damn, did I really blow that? They were just talking about his nightmares?] He looked at Zechs, at how close they were sitting, and shook his head. [How am I suppose to think when he has his arms around me?!]

Suddenly Duo felt closed-in and quite the fool. "Funny how Heero was always conveniently around," he said, wriggling to get out of the embrace. [God, I hope he's not thinking threesome!] "Whenever I went looking for *you* all I had to do was find Heero and there you'd be!"

"Stop fighting me!" Zechs growled with exasperation, tightening his arms around the writhing boy, shaking his head again with frustration. [How did he get so fixated on that?] "Heero and I had to *work* together, and otherwise, he was just *there*! What can I say, the boy is a good listener! He means nothing to me otherwise, Duo! I mean, he might as well have been my *mother* if I'd had one!"

"A better listener than me, huh?" Duo asked, incensed that Zechs would choose Heero over him for any reason. He pushed against Zechs and continued to try to work his way out of the man's arms. "What is it with you?" Duo asked, squirming madly now. "You won't make love to me, but you'll go running to him!"

"Duo, baby, please stop, I don't want to hurt you!" Zechs gasped, trying to hold on. "I'm not running to Heero! And the dream... oh, God, Duo, the dream meant that I'm healed, I know what made me panic and it has no power over me anymore! I *can* make love to you... please don't leave me!"

Duo froze as if a spell had been cast upon him, making him unable to squirm or push against the man anymore. He looked with awe and reticence into the ice-blue eyes gazing back at him through the long platinum hair. "You're healed...?" he asked, his voice timid and laced with continued fear. "You can make love to me...?" At that he shivered and looked with glassy, hopeful eyes at his... lover? For these things to be true it meant that he had almost lost everything. He had come within inches... seconds... of throwing this all away.

A painful, shaking sob escaped him, tears falling from his eyes with every blink. "You called me 'baby'," Duo said finally, breaking down completely and falling into Zechs's arms, wrapping himself around his lover.

"Yes, oh, my Dancer, yes!" Zechs exclaimed, relief flooding through him now that Duo was finally listening and not trying to escape his arms. "Yes, baby, I meant that. I love you and I have so much to tell you about the memories that came back." The unshed tears in his eyes brimmed over at last, spilling onto his cheeks. "I... I feel the change in myself, now that I know... but you have to promise me you'll never run from me, Duo, never again! I couldn't bear to lose you..."

He could say no more, instead pressing fervent kisses into his lover's hair. [Without you I would lose myself,] he thought, remembering how dead inside he had felt after returning to Lake Victoria Base after dispatching the murderous Alex and Mueller. [I was already losing myself...]

Still shaking from his sobs, Duo looked up, wanting desperately to see his lover's face. "Oh, God, I almost lost you..." he said, crying in earnest again. He swallowed hard, tasting the salty tears and imagining all too clearly the hollow existence that would have been waiting for him without this beautiful man in his life. "I love you, Zechs," he said zealously and without fear. "And I'll never run from you again. I promise!"

"Thank you, love," Zechs whispered quietly, turning his head so he could look down into the streaming eyes, then quickly kissed the tears on Duo's cheeks. "Dancer, sweet one, don't cry..." It didn't matter that he was crying himself; he wanted nothing more than to soothe his distressed lover right now. "We're going to be all right now, I promise. We're finally going to talk about everything. It will be all right..." Fervently he kissed away Duo's tears and looked into his eyes, hoping his Dancer could see the love in his.

The boy's lips curved ever so gently into a small smile as his lover's words and tender kisses soothed him and slowed his tears. "Yeah... talk," he said, nodding. "I'm usually pretty good at that, but lately... I'm sorry I did that to you. But I was totally convinced that you wanted to talk to me so you could..." He didn't finish the thought, but he did shake his head and give himself a swift mental kick. "I was a total idiot. God, Zechs you must've wanted to strangle me!"

A quick burst of sound half-way between a laugh and a snort erupted from Zechs, who lifted a hand to hastily brush at his own cheeks, then curled it back around his lover again. "I would never strangle you, love, but you must consider your Gundam to be communal property between us from now on, for I am *not* letting you hide out in that again!" He sniffed and held Duo tighter. "Or in Tallgeese, for that matter. You get any funny feelings again, young man, and we deal with them here... in my lap! That is, if I ever let you out of my arms again..." He managed a wink.

"I will gladly sit on your lap anytime!" Duo said, cheerfully. Then his eyes went wide, horrified that his remark might be considered crass... since for many weeks there had been so many rules to follow. "Oh, sorry..." he started to say, but then saw that Zechs didn't seem upset by it. [So, this must be okay. Wow! We're really okay now!] "God, I've missed this! Missed talking to you like this!" he said with relief and dove in for another fierce hug.

Zechs, too, hugged back hard, mentally echoing the sentiment. The solidity and warmth of the lithe body in his arms felt so good, soothing the heightened frustration that had nearly driven him mad over the past day. "Nothing to be sorry for," he murmured, closing his eyes. "We've begun yet another chapter... a very, very good one. I'm just so glad to hold you, talk to you at last. Last night when you came here drunk... I couldn't imagine what had driven you to do that, Duo. You were... frightening. I was so bewildered... And we couldn't talk then, either."

"That was the idea," Duo said with a derisive snort. [And completely stupid!] He looked up again, this time reaching his hand to Zechs's face, gliding his fingers over the man's handsome features. "I've still got a headache, but otherwise I'm okay... we can talk all day and night if you want," he said and smiled. [Feels so good... to look at him... touch him... and not feel that ache.]

"Ohhh, your touch," Zechs murmured, his voice dropping lower. "We need to talk and talk, yes, Dancer," he answered, "but that's not all we're going to do." He freed a hand, too, as they eased the tightness of their embrace enough to look at one another. Then he tipped Duo's chin up so he could look down into the cobalt pools still shimmering minutely with a few last tears. Their faces were very close. Zechs's mouth curved slowly into a smile. "In fact I need to do something right now..."

Then he descended upon Duo's mouth, opening the tender lips with his own, delving deep to taste of his lover, renewing the imprinting of that taste on his senses, though it had been just a day since he'd kissed Duo last. It seemed like a year had passed in that single day, a year parting them since that abortive oral sex attempt.

The kiss was sweet and precious to Duo like the forgiveness and promise it held. [This is it... we're finally going to be together again. I can hardly believe it,] he thought as he kissed back, letting Zechs know that he wanted this... needed him like never before. "Mmmm," Duo moaned, as he explored the other man's mouth with his tongue and felt himself tingle with the sensation.

Suddenly there was a loud banging on Zechs's door. They broke apart in surprise, then Zechs scowled at the offensive noise. "What the...?" He released Duo a little to pull out his beeper, but there were no alerts on it. His radio, deep in a pocket of the long gray coat, was also silent. Obviously it was no emergency. "Eh, forget it," he muttered, reaching for Duo again.

"Yeah, come here, you," Duo said, pulling Zechs to him again by the front of his coat.

*Bang, bang, bang!*

"Ah, damn, I suppose I should see what crass, ignorant fool is trying to break in," he snapped, more than a little irritated at the ill-timed interruption.

"A crass, ignorant fool with a death wish!" Duo said, fiercely and then chuckled. He liked how unnerved Zechs was by the interruption. It told him just how desperate the man was for them to be alone.

"Well, as I said I wasn't going to let you go, you're coming with me," Zechs replied, firmly taking Duo's hand in his as he got up off the bed. Trailing his lover behind him as if his arm were a leash, he strode to see to the door.

Opening the door a crack, Zechs barked, "What is it?!"

To his wonder, Heero Yuy stood there, eyes averted, holding up a tray of covered dishes. "You have to eat sometime!" he declared, then hastily put the tray on the floor, turned, and departed back down the hallway with a very determined stride, not waiting for a response.

Surprised, Zechs opened the door all the way up, stepping into the hall with Duo only long enough to see the shrinking back of their comrade, then he let go of Duo's hand to pick up the tray. "Thank you!" he called, then went back inside with the tray, leaving it on the sofa as Duo closed the door and locked it again.

As Zechs straightened, he spied the corner of an envelope peeking out from under the sofa. "Well, that was solicitous of him to think of our nutritional needs," he was already saying with a chuckle. "What is this?" He bent to pick up the envelope.

"Yeah, that was nice of him. I'm starving," Duo said as he padded over to the sofa to dig into the eats. He stopped cold when he saw what Zechs held in his hands. [Oh, shit! My note!] The last thing he needed right now was for Zechs to read his good-bye note. He had to distract the man and fast. So he slipped in front of his lover and ran his hands up his arms. "Come on... give me a kiss and then we'll eat."

The envelope still clutched in one hand, Zechs gladly gathered Duo in against him and bent to kiss him deeply. [Duo said something positive about Heero!] he thought with relief, then chuckled internally. [Being an unwitting part of Duo's recent madness, I can see that Heero is anxious to mend fences. Interesting that he thought of getting food together for us...]

"Oh, yeah," Duo said, licking his lips as the kiss ended. "Now that's what I like!" To further distract him, he began to strip Zechs out of his long, gray coat. "You need to get more comfortable."

The envelope was laid down on the arm of the sofa while Zechs yielded the morning coat. "I need to get a *lot* more comfortable," he agreed warmly, unbuttoning the long uniform jacket as well. "And I think I'm needing nourishment as well." After leaving the jacket on the far end of the sofa, he dropped down to sit, tugging Duo back down onto his lap.

"Hey," Duo said, laughing, and then quickly wrapped his arms about the man's neck and nuzzled his cheek. "Mmm, how comfortable do you want to get?" he asked, playfully, but before his blond lover could respond there was yet another knock at the door. "Go away!" Duo yelled out.

"It's me, Quatre..." came a muffled voice, though loud enough to be heard through the door. "I'm sorry to bother you, but I have your bags." Just before the shuttle was to taxi out to the launch pad, Trowa had discovered Duo's duffel bags stowed on board and had called for Quatre to retrieve them.

"Oh! Just a sec," Duo said, and wriggled off Zechs's lap. "Coming with me?" he asked when he noticed Zechs had hold of his waistband.

"No, that's fine. You're not going anywhere," Zechs replied, releasing him with a quick caress of his hand over Duo's ass.

"Yum, keep that thought," Duo said with a wink and then scurried over to open the door. "Hey, buddy."

"Duo," Quatre said with a sigh of relief. "You guys okay? I can feel it, but I want to hear you say it."

The boy with the long braid smiled brightly. "You bet! We're great! Thanks, buddy," he said, and then squeezed his friend's arm. "Thanks a bunch. You guys made this possible."

Quatre smiled, his eyes moist with tears. "I'm so happy for you," he said, and then held out the two duffel bags. "I know you guys need some time alone, but I thought you'd like your things... and I also put something extra in there." When Duo looked at him with curious eyes, he explained, "The photos from Cairo. I hope you can enjoy them now... with Zechs."

Duo nodded. "Yeah, I'll enjoy them now." And then very quietly he said, "Thanks for not burning them. I was really messed up when I said that."

"Oh, Duo, I know. It's okay." And with that Quatre nodded a good-bye and headed down the hall to find Miss Po for some company. [Trowa's only been gone a few minutes and I already miss him...]

Duo set his bags down and then looked at the man seated on the sofa, waiting for him. "God, Zechs, you're a sight for sore eyes," he said and hurried back into the man's lap. "Now where were we?"

Gratefully, Zechs collected his lapful up against him, enjoying feeling Duo close. He glanced over Duo's shoulder and back at the two duffel bags on the floor. [My God, he really *was* trying to leave...] "Getting comfortable... like this... and then we should eat something." [Because both of us are going to be needing our strength...]

"Mmm... snuggle just a bit more," Duo said, hugging his man tightly as he tried to absorb the feeling of being close again. [God, I almost lost this. I never want to be that scared again...] Finally, the smell of breakfast was just too much.

His stomach rumbled from nearly two days without food. "Gotta eat," he said, giving Zechs a quick kiss to the cheek and then slid off his lap to kneel on the floor before the tray of food. He removed the covers to find scrambled eggs, bacon, sausage links rolled in pastry dough, fresh baked brown bread with butter, and a plate of sliced fruit. "Wow! The cook outdid herself this time!" Duo cheered and dove in, not bothering to even make up his own plate... eating right off the tray.

Remaining on the sofa, Zechs scooted over to sit beside the tray, reaching past Duo's busy hands for a plate and utensils. Chuckling, he filled his plate. [He still bounces back so quickly... but that only helps me do the same. Cairo... mmm...] "Though it's very late for breakfast, I find I have nothing to complain about either," he murmured, eating more circumspectly while Duo stuffed himself.

"Late? Maybe if you're a rooster!" Duo said, chuckling and then swallowed before he choked. "The rest of us... living in the civilized world... sleep in!" He smiled brightly at Zechs and then squeezed his knee, remembering fondly how the man liked to rise early... in more ways than one. [Oh, those morning erections were impressive when I was awake enough to enjoy them.] He bit back a devilish grin and then shoved another sausage into his mouth.

Zechs's eyes grew wide, watching Duo manhandle the link of sausage. Then his gaze turned slightly molten, just enough to get the message across that he was enjoying the very suggestive view. "Good... you're practicing..." he murmured, then busied himself with buttering a slice of bread.

[Well, there's no mistaking what's on his mind... good,] Duo thought as his body warmed more and more to the prospect of lovemaking. "I had a good teacher," Duo said, heatedly. Feeling free to exhibit his desire, he slid another sausage into his mouth, and then pulled it back out slowly to allude to what he would do to Zechs when first given the chance. "Practice makes perfect," he said with a satisfied grin.

"Homework," Zechs agreed with a matching grin.

(tbc)


Chapter 24

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